fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2464 ]

[ SECRET POST #2464 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2464 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 031 secrets from Secret Submission Post #352.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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10. http://i.imgur.com/neBjaq1.png

Congrats on your new horror movie stereotype survivability! I would definitely be the first to go.

Well, that virgin thing is only in certain kinds of horror movies -- and even in those, there are exceptions. So don't worry about it, OP! :Db

and even in those, there are exceptions.

Specifically, those who don't actually have sex while being stalked by the dude with the big knife. So just be aware of your situation, and don't have sex in spooky places, and you'll be fine!

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2013-10-02 03:16 (UTC) - Expand

Well, you'd no longer be used for a virgin sacrifice.

those often survive with witty escapes though.

This made me lol. Thanks Anon.

Unless OP lies about his/her virginity, gets sacrificed, and returns as a demon.

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2013-10-02 11:57 (UTC) - Expand

Didn't Cindy or whatever survived her first time in Scream, though? There's hope for you, OP.

Sidney :)

And yes, that was sort of the whole point with Scream.

Edited 2013-10-02 02:35 (UTC)

(no subject)

electromouse - 2013-10-02 04:29 (UTC) - Expand

So you can't be sacrificed to a volcano, used as bait for a unicorn or killed by one to lengthen its life, or be a Vestal Virgin of Rome. Big deal.

Seriously, we only have the horror movie thing going for us and even then, that trope is subverted more and more now-a-days.

So we virgins give you a loving farewell and hope you enjoy your life from now on as a virgout.

Virgout! Good one, did you come up with it? I might have to steal that.

(no subject)

forgottenjester - 2013-10-01 23:55 (UTC) - Expand

I had the same thought when I lost my v-card. Ha!

Well, if you hear a noise, don't go down to the basement/outside to check around and your odds of surviving should be pretty good.

You would be more likely to survive if your horror movie was The Wicker Man. Killing you wouldn't bring back any apples (or honey).

Okay, whether it was unintentional or not, the term 'sexual debut' made me think you'd made your first porno. Sorry. XD

Well, in a lot of horror movies, the characters show their non-virginity by actually having sex within the horror movie setting. So, you know, avoid having sex in a spooky camp that's been abandoned for years, or a creepy looking house, or on Halloween. And remember, it's usually less than ten people who die in any given movie, so there are whole towns and schools of people who have probably had sex in every movie that do survive.

But, for the love of God, do not take several of your closest friends and go stay in a cabin in the woods.

So, you know, avoid having sex in a spooky camp that's been abandoned for years, or a creepy looking house, or on Halloween.

What about abandoned amusement parks? Or spooky roller discos? Or by that lake where the sexy teens were killed one hundred years ago tonight?

Re: Just pay attention to your surroundings

(Anonymous) - 2013-10-02 01:04 (UTC) - Expand

If you ever find yourself confronted with a serial killer who actually asks if you're a virgin, just lie and say yes.

...Wait, maybe you'll wind up getting the serial killer who prefers virgins. Better just carry some pepper spray.

(no subject)

misty_anon - 2013-10-02 00:34 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2013-10-02 01:56 (UTC) - Expand

LOL, this made me laugh.

Just don't do it again.

I wouldn't worry. I'm pretty sure that trope has been aggressively subverted.

Didn't the virgin thing peak with Reagan? Now, it seems to be all about selfishness and deceit. So tip your waitress and don't stab people in the back.

...If it makes you feel any better, my first thought was "damn, now if I get bit by a (traditional, non-sparkly) vampire I'm fucked."

There's the movie Cherry Falls where it's the virgins that get killed, so if you were in that one you'd be good.

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