fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2467 ]

[ SECRET POST #2467 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2467 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Attack on Titan]

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[Harry Potter]

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[Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D./Phil Coulson]

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[Breaking Bad / Back to the Future]

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So, I have an awful boss. He's not great from a managerial standpoint either, but from a personal standpoint, he's just a genuinely bad person. He's a bully. He's verbally attacked me over petty things more than once. Always in public. Always with sarcasm. Twice now, the things he's chosen to do this over have been things I've been doing consistently for a year, and suddenly they are wrong (not prompted by any change in the business, just...'cause, apparently) to the degree that he has to bawl me out over it in public. One of these times was the middle of a busy shift with customers waiting for me. The most recent of these times, he asked me to explain the reasoning behind the order I was doing tasks in, interrupted me before I finished, then called me stupid.

The worst part of all of this is that afterwards he feels guilty, comes over and says "I'm not fussing" and "I love you." The "I love you" is always the worst part because he genuinely thinks that he does. His wife (co-owner) genuinely thinks he does too, and claims he's a "marshmallow."

The upshot of all this is, today, we had several customers come in, look things over, and decide not to buy anything. I was disappointed, obviously, but you can't win everybody over. However, he called me over, asked, "And why did we lose them?" and the look on his face was exactly the same as it had been just before he attacked me last time. This time he didn't, but even without him actually lighting into me, I was still incredibly stressed out all day.

I'm not expecting anyone to solve this here. I'm just venting. And clearly the solution here is to get a new job. Believe me, the applications are going out. As soon as I can go, I'm gone. But I'm starting to wonder if you can get PTSD from being bullied at work. He's really got me frazzled and I just can't stand him. To the point where the very idea of going in to work in the morning makes me want to cry sometimes.

I'm sorry you're having such a shitty experience at work, and I hope you find a new job with a boss who isn't a giant asshole soon.

Dude, what kind of boss even tells their employees they love them? It's so creepy that he sounds like an abusive lover. W.T.F.

I hope you can get out of there soon, man. Good luck!

OP

I should clarify by saying he is a much older man (in his 70s) and also goes to the same church as me. And my sister worked for this place before I did. So there is a personal connection.

That being said, yeah, it's a little weird.

You can definitely get PTSD from being bullied at work. Heck, my immediate supervisors at my last job were all pretty nice people (if sometimes incompetent), but the corporate atmosphere has left me completely scarred. I'm at a sensible office job now, with sensible supervisors who let me report my own hours and actively TELL people to "come take a break, we're taking a walk in the woods" and don't bother getting around to actually working again for a couple hours if nothing pressing is going on, and I am constantly writing down LESS hours than I actually worked just to make sure they don't think I'm cheating on my time cards, and looking over my shoulder for hidden cameras (which the old job did have and which upper management used to spy on me when I was working alone). This is two years later...

Bad work environments are just as capable of causing lasting emotional trauma as bad home environments, IMO. Bad is bad, and I'm glad you're taking steps to get out of there, because it really is unhealthy. :/ I hope you manage to escape quickly, especially because you may need some time to relax at a new job.

Yes, it is absolutely possible to get PTSD from workplace bullying. The PTSD can be as severe as for people who have gone through other traumas that would appear more "serious" (eg. natural disaster, assault.)

OP, if you can get out of there eventually, it sounds like a good plan. You don't have obligations to these people, it's not like you've sold your soul to them.

It would be best to get a new job lined up before you quit, though.

And your boss? Is a shitty person. The apologies and guilt afterwards sound word-for-word like an abusive spouse. It's creepy, tbh.

That kind of treatment is totally inappropriate in a workplace setting. You deserve to be treated with a basic level of respect and dignity.

That's emotional abuse. I really recommend you start looking for another job if you can (or just quit, but in this economy I get why you might feel like you can't).

I had a boss that used to to the exact same. We used to always say 'he's a great manager but a horrible human being'. I stopped working with him 10 years ago and I still wake up from having nightmares where I'm right back getting yelled at for stupid shit.

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[ SECRET POST #2467 ]

Horrible Boss - Not Fandom, Just Venting

Re: Horrible Boss - Not Fandom, Just Venting

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Re: Horrible Boss - Not Fandom, Just Venting

Re: Horrible Boss - Not Fandom, Just Venting

Re: Horrible Boss - Not Fandom, Just Venting