fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2474 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2474 ⌋

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[Once Upon a Time]

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07. [SPOILERS for NCIS]

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08. [SPOILERS for Breaking Bad]

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09. [SPOILERS for Dangan Ronpa]

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10. [SPOILERS for Breaking Bad]

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

My boss is flirting with me big time and I'm reallllly loving it.

Caveat? He's married with 2 kids.

I feel like a scumbag.

You do not want to be in this situation. He's a scumbag. Don't encourage him.

I know it's a terrible thing, but I get compliments so very rarely and it's very hard to ignore this positive attention when I've been trying to work on my self-image and self-esteem recently. I feel like an asshole for not shutting him down but it's hard when i've spent my whole life feeling ugly. idk. Confused :/

Look at it this way: How would you feel if you found out your SO was doing this, and the other person didn't shut them down? Probably not too great, particularly when it's possible that your SO might mean to do more than just flirt.

Maybe think of it as not wanting to be the kind of ugly who scumbags think are one of their own?

In addition to what everyone else has said, he very likely isn't singling you out because you're wonderful--he's targeting you because he can see that your self-esteem is shaky. Sleazebags usually have a 6th sense for such things.

I think it's important to know that he's a scumbag and being involved with him would be wrong. You can't exactly control what flatters you, but as long as you don't act on it or encourage it I think you're cool.

Possibly your boss is just a flirt, but even if he's flirting only with you, don't worry about it. Flirting is harmless and pretty normal between acquaintances. As long as it doesn't go further, you're fine.

There is such a thing as innocent flirting. As long as he doesn't try anything more (and you don't either) then I'd say let it be good for your ego and don't stress about it.

"Flirting with me big time" does not sound innocent. At all.

...yeah, it does? Some people are flirtatious. It's a social trait, and doesn't necessarily mean anything. Unless OP can give us specific examples to put it outside the realm of normal flirting, we can still classify it as innocent if we want.

I'd call flirting innocent if it's coming from someone who flirts a lot, but only occasionally with any given person--in that case, it means very little. "Flirting with me big time," on the other hand, sounds like it happens every day, several times a day, and the boss is concentrating his attention on the OP. If you think that's harmless, you probably don't have much of a moral compass yourself.

I think you're assuming a lot based on five words from a comment from someone who probably isn't the best judge of flirting to begin with.

OP also admits to lifelong self-esteem issues, so I imagine they are not the expert on flirting.

Put yourself in your boss's kids' shoes walking in on the two of you. Or imagine them accusing you or your boss of doing things you're both not supposed to.

I would say the wife but that tends to somehow make people feel like doing terrible deeds is worth it even more for some fucked up reason.

=( All I can say is, be careful, anon. Don't do it, and if anything happens, you know that at least someone (even if it is just random people from the internet) has told you DON'T DO IT! IT IS WRONG!

This is not a dilemma. He's a scumbag and should be discouraged. Get your ego-strokes elsewhere.

[ SECRET POST #2474 ]

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