fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2481 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2481 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

[game of thrones]

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02.

[Star Trek, Sleepy Hollow, Elementary]

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03.

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04.

[Junjou Romantica]

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05.

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

06. [SPOILERS for Percy Jackson]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

07. [WARNING for suicide/self-harm]

[Slipknot]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #354.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Sure I have. I'm good at sidestepping irrelevant conflicts, though, and if all else fails, I can always try to do exactly the above: get their ass booted. Then they're not my problem anymore, and I'm not frothing in rage.

Yes but while it is happening it sucks.

Sucks more than sexist, bigoted, homophobic behavior? Because OP can apparently tune all that out and go on their merry way.

Sexual harassment IS sexist behavior.

Do they all do it? Are we placing the entire subset of "gamer girls" under the umbrella of sexual harassers? I mean, the secret just talks about entitlement and free stuff, and the OP already thinks stuck snots are the worst possible thing.

Not all of them do, but I never said they ALL did it. But all of them are obnoxious to have in a guild (and generally bad for guild morale).

so what you're saying is...."people can't be angry when girls are sexually harassing people because that's sexist. Girls should be ~free~ to do whatever the hell they want even if it bothers everyone else?

I am female....but HELL YES am I going to be angry when someone of my gender is being an entitled shit because of their gender. I'd do the same if it were a man.

Please stop acting like because it doesn't bother you it is wrong if it bothers anyone else.

Ultimately, your rage is pointless. Do the responsible thing and either avoid them, or, if they cross the line, report them. It's the protocol for real life sexual harassment too.

Also, I like how this entire thing went immediately from "gamer girls are entitled and bitchy when they don't get free shit" to "all gamer girls engage in sexual harassment". Jumping to extremes like this is exactly why you have so much anger.

I said "If" I was talking about the situation the persona above mentioned explicitly. I'm not normally invested in games or gamer girls because I don't play video games.

But if someone is harassing someone else, there's a good reason to be pissed off at that person.

also NOWHERE did I say all "gamer girls" or all girls partook in this behavior.

Hell I didn't even MENTION the term "gamer girls". You're fabricating something to get indignant over from things I never said. Knock it off.

Well, the discussion at hand is about gamer girls, so what else would we be talking about? Sorry, maybe I was blindsided when you jumped in with your intense rage. It happens.

Though, speaking of fabrication, do tell how my advocating calling people on their BS and reporting them should indicate that I think "Girls should be ~free~ to do whatever the hell they want even if it bothers everyone else?" And where did the "because it's sexist" thing even come from anyway? Oh my, somebody is indignant over something I never said.

Okay.... that's a fair point. I'm sorry.

Still...why are you all "STOP GETTING MAD just report and forget about it"? Different things get to different people.

Maybe OP doesn't get spun up about guys who say douchey things in game play because it happens so often you just shrug it off. Maybe they're annoyed because they don't want to be associated with girls who do this if people were to find out they were a girl? They don't want people perpetuating this stereotype.

I was offering an actual solution to the problem. I imagine if the wrongdoers are punished, they'll be discouraged. If they're not in my guild anymore, I have no reason to be pissed. I do disapprove of the theoretical gamer girls out there who engage in the behavior, but I'm not in rage over it.

Eh, OP thinks bigotry and homophobia can be "tuned out" but entitlement in female gamers is beyond the pale. Nobody is saying that kind of behavior is kosher, we just think we could prioritize better.

*...er "when"

still specifying a particular occasion. Like IN THIS SITUATION.

Ultimately, your rage is pointless. Do the responsible thing and either avoid them, or, if they cross the line, report them.

Huh, wow. That's the same sort of response I've seen people give to women who are bothered by men being jerks to them in games. It's problematic there, and I don't think it applies the other way around, either. If someone is being obnoxious, then it's on them to stop, and it's not the responsibility of other people to not be bothered.

That's a matter of different approaches, then. You can be futilely angry and rage about it in a secret, or you can lay it out for the offender straight, "You're being an ass. Cut it out or I'm reporting you." I know what works for me.

You can be futilely angry and rage about it in a secret

Haha. For one, you seem to be missing the point of f!s. For two, why do you assume that people aren't doing both?

It's something that's legitimately worth getting angry about. If you're the same anon, you weren't just saying people should report them (which they should) but also that they should avoid them. The onus is not on the party being harassed/otherwise treated badly to avoid being harassed. It's on the people being jerks to stop being jerks. I'm not going to let them control where I go.

I find nothing wrong with sidestepping conflicts I find not worth my time, though I will usually attempt to call the offender out first. If it's something I really care about, I'll try harder, ending with reporting them. It's pretty simple.

Well, I'm glad that works for you, but that's not how everyone handles it. My rage is not pointless. Maybe you feels yours would be - ok.

Edited 2013-10-20 19:04 (UTC)

[ SECRET POST #2481 ]

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