case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2013-10-20 03:36 pm

[ SECRET POST #2483 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2483 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 054 secrets from Secret Submission Post #355.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 01:11 am (UTC)(link)
Ok, I gotta ask.

What the fuck is your issue here? "OMG someone on fandom secrets defines an adult differently to me. THIS CAN NOT BE! SOMTHING MUST BE DONE."

I'm noticing a bit of a trend with you throwing your weight around in a "I think this, and you don't.... because you're stupid, everyone listen to me, I know what I'm talking about better than all of you" kind of way, and you know, that's fine, however you want to get down, but I have to know, is this an ego thing for you? you boost your ego by picking stupid fights over nothing and browbeating people into shutting up? Is it an anger thing? are you just looking for a fight? is this a new form of trolling I'm out of the loop on? or are you legitimately getting bent out of shape over 1.a stupid joke followed by 2.A person saying they don't feel they can be defined as an adult because they refuse to act like an adult? I just need to know, what's going on here?

And no, I'm not looking for pity. I'm, by and large, very content with my life. If I'm looking for anything, right this second, it's for you to leave me the fuck alone, but the purpose of the last comment was to highlight all the ways I do not fit into the role (as I see it) of an adult.

but your problems are few compared to many people who do, in fact, consider themselves adults. There are people living with serious mental issues who consider themselves adults. There are people living in their parents' basements permanently calling themselves adults. There are people still in school calling themselves adults.

and you are ok with all these people defining adults the way they want, but when it comes to me considering that I have a long way to go before I can be called an adult, you apparently have a problem? I ask again, what is going on here?

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 01:28 am (UTC)(link)
Usually when someone says "No, I'm not an adult!" and are as old as you are, it stems from them not wanting to accept that they're not that young anymore or they want to shirk the responsibilities that go along with it. I can't speak for Chard, but for me I cringed really hard reading you describe that you aren't an adult because you play games and read comic books.

You're three or so years shy of thirty. You are an adult. The thing is, is that there isn't this one magical moment where it dings and you *feel* like you're an adult. You're always you, no matter how many birthdays you go through. And...you're not a teenager anymore. You're almost a decade over being a teenager, dude. :P

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 01:47 am (UTC)(link)
Oh I don't care about getting 'old' but yeah, a fear of responsibility is a part of it. an adult, as I define the term, may fear responsibility but makes the 'adult' choice to face it. I, as far as possible, do not make the 'adult' choices. I don't consider myself an adult because I don't make the choices necessary to be an adult.

The "playing games and reading comic books are not the cause for me not considering myself an adult, they're a symptom. maybe not symptom, symptom implies an illness or a disfunction, but they you see what I'm saying here, right?

I will consider myself an adult when I can say "That was the adult decision" about my life choices. So far I have not taken any opportunity to do that.

I am a "Grown Up" but I am not an "adult" as far as I define the term. in the same way that movies with "mature themes" are not necessarily for mature people.

Sort of like how the school kid in chards example considers them self an adult, but might not be legally an adult, you know? you're right, it's not about age, it's about the situation you're in, and the choices you make that define how much of an adult you are.
chardmonster: (Default)

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

[personal profile] chardmonster 2013-10-21 02:30 am (UTC)(link)
Oh I don't care about getting 'old' but yeah, a fear of responsibility is a part of it. an adult, as I define the term, may fear responsibility but makes the 'adult' choice to face it. I, as far as possible, do not make the 'adult' choices. I don't consider myself an adult because I don't make the choices necessary to be an adult.

Oh wow

Does your girlfriend know you have these issues? How old is she? Is she an "adult?"

Sort of like how the school kid in chards example considers them self an adult, but might not be legally an adult, you know?

Dude, I meant college.
Edited 2013-10-21 02:30 (UTC)

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 03:38 am (UTC)(link)
I have a sneaking suspicion that his girlfriend is in her late teen years.
chardmonster: (Default)

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

[personal profile] chardmonster 2013-10-21 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
I wasn't going to say that, but... yeah.

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 03:30 am (UTC)(link)
The very definition of adult is someone who is fully developed. You are almost thirty. You are an adult, period. Maturity doesn't equal adulthood, you realize that, right?
diet_poison: (Default)

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

[personal profile] diet_poison 2013-10-21 02:16 am (UTC)(link)
I think what bothers me about it isn't the assessment about his maturity (I really cannot say, there) but the implication that enjoying comics and video games make one immature.

They don't. Those are hobbies adults can and do enjoy, including those who are responsible/ambitious/self-supporting/healthy/whatever adjective you want to apply that you think describes adults more appropriately.

Also, I'll add: not everyone is super ambitious. Some people work to pay the bills. As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're supporting yourself and not relying on someone else to do it for you, you're being responsible in that regard. Maybe you want to do more, and maybe you should, but you aren't being irresponsible if you pay your own way (unless there's other info there that isn't apparent, or something).
Edited 2013-10-21 02:16 (UTC)

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 08:15 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. this turned into a real shit storm really quickly.

The comics, videogames, and lack of ambition are not examples of my lack of responsibility, they are symptoms. I know I can still be an adult and do all of that, but the fact that I choose, knowingly choose to spend all of my time on that specifically as in an attempt to avoid making adult choices, that makes me not someone I would call an adult.

(frozen comment) Re: Get some!

(Anonymous) 2013-10-21 04:37 pm (UTC)(link)
lol Look Peter Pan, you're an adult. You are fully grown, you have all your adult teeth, your bones are fused, your body is dying instead of growing. You. Are. An. Adult. You really need to deal with these issues you have with getting older, because you are way passed being a teenager.
chardmonster: (Default)

(frozen comment) Here is what's going on.

[personal profile] chardmonster 2013-10-21 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
You know those unresolved issues you said were set aside because you lost your virginity? I'm not sure they were set aside at all.

You're trying to fundamentally redefine "adulthood" so that it doesn't include you. This is AFTER you have a job, pay rent, buy your own shit, and apparently have a girlfriend. And instead of really tackling why this is, you're yelling at me for saying it.

What do you consider adulthood? Your parents? Whom I presume never, ever like or pay for anything you consider silly?

Aside: people might be calling you a manchild because you throw tantrums. All I said at the beginning of this was one and two sentence statements, you responded with an apologetic for your entire life.
Edited 2013-10-21 02:33 (UTC)