fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2559 ]

[ SECRET POST #2559 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2559 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 062 secrets from Secret Submission Post #366.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

NS, NF, etc.

HALP.

HALP I'M DYING.

YOU HAVE KILLED ME WITH ROFLMAO.

NS2 OH, GOD
MY SIDES
MY SIDES ARE IN ORBIT

I approve of today's not!secrets.

not!secrets bringing the A game today

that's the good stuff, everybody. that's the heat

The first one's not even a not-secret. That image has been around for a while, and the not-not-secreter didn't bother doing anything to it.

I would argue that there's humor in submitting it as a fandom secret. It's goofy.

It's just very lazy...just grabbing something off a random humour website and posting it unaltered is OK for a humour picspam thread, but you shouldn't get credit for it here.

Who cares? I've never seen it before and it's *hilarious*. Thank you, N!S anon!!

OMG HDU, you cheating bastards?

OMG both of these are perfection <3

Bless you N!S makers. Bless you.

File misfire number 1?

[Picture is a screen-capture of an "Amazon" product review of a box of "Kleenex Facial Tissue, White (pack of 36)". It has the watermak of the website "UhPinions.com"

The review goes like this:

Five stars, "A mother's struggle", December 8, 2013.

"I want to start this off by thanking Kleenex for selling these in 36-packs. I've put it on subscription, and if they want to start selling a 72-pack, sign me up. I have three reasons for needing this much Kleenex, and their names are Liam, Samuel and Hank.

This is how it goes in the house. First the Kleenex disappears. Then the toilet paper. Then they go for fabrics. And you don't want it to get there, unless you're ready to invest in a five gallon drum of Fabreeze.

This used to be a good Christian home. But it's not about moral judgment anymore. I'm way beyond that. I'm in survival mode. If I don't supply absorbent paper products, I'm going to find my dish towels hidden in the basement, stiff as aluminium. The other day, I almost cut my hand on a sock. I am sorry to speak so frankly, but with three teenage boys, a woman has got to be practical.

The funny part is, they think they're being sneaky, with their 45 minute showers and sudden need for "privacy", as if I'm going to walk in on them journaling. They slink around the house like unfixed cats, while I try to announce my location at all times. No one needs to ask me to knock anymore. I knock on the walls. I practically wear a cow bell. I'm not looking to catch anyone by surprise, believe me. I'm just trying to get through this.

The other day my husband was watching me unload the groceries, and he asks me, all sweetness and light, "Honey, what're you doing with all that Kleenex?"

I about knocked him off his chair.

Edited 2014-01-04 22:45 (UTC)

[Picture is a drawing of a man trying to throw another into a waterfall (I think it's from a Sherlock Holmes book?). It has the caption "SWAN DIVE into the best night of your life", and the person doing the throwing is saying "allie-oop!"]

It's Sherlock Holmes all right-- the famous Reichenbach Falls scene from "The Final Problem".

Thank you! I corrected page 2.

Yes, that's from Sherlock Holmes. It's Holmes and Moriarty struggling before going over the edge of the Reichenbach Falls.

I have no insight whatsoever into what OP means, though.

Thank you! I've added this to page 2.

It's a reference to one of the Old Spice commercials with the "man your man should smell like":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLTIowBF0kE

(warning for description of gross odors)

[Picture is white text with black outlines over a white background.]

I've noticed that a lot of secrets here on Fandom Secrets aren't really secrets that anyone would keep even from their pets. So I thought I would reveal a secret to this community, since it's anonymous anyway (one that isn't made up, of course):

Whenever a character reacts to or mentions the scent of dead bodies (usually in crime shows or movies), I always imagine it to smell exactly like the end of a period when the blood is brown and sludgy and has sat on a pad for a while. Usually mixed with sweat from sitting for long periods of time, like in a vehicle or something. Smells kind of like rotting gym socks and old blood. Or at least one mine does.

Yeah, I don't think I have to explain why this one's a secret.

Edited 2014-01-04 22:51 (UTC)

Original secret was posted in the post number 2518

http://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/915418.html?thread=699824346#cmt699824346

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2559 ]

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NS1

Re: NS1

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N!S1

N!S 2

N!S

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Transcript of Not Secret 1 - (It's about masturbation)

Transcript of Not Secret 2 - Sherlock Holmes?

Re: Transcript of Not Secret 2 - Sherlock Holmes?

Re: Transcript of Not Secret 2 - Sherlock Holmes?

Re: Transcript of Not Secret 2 - Sherlock Holmes?

Re: Transcript of Not Secret 2 - Sherlock Holmes?

Re: Transcript of Not Secret 2 - Sherlock Holmes?

Repeat - Smell of dead bodies in fiction, Menstruation (warning for description of gross odors)

Notes