fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2571 ]

[ SECRET POST #2571 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2571 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Revenge]

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03.

[Vatta's War - Trading in Danger]

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04.

[Dirty Rotten Scoundrels]

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05.

[Doctor Who]

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06.

[Sherlock]

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07.

[Mass Effect]

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08.

[Sleepy Hollow]

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[Star Trek: The Next Generation]

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11. [tb2]

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12. [repeat]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 022 secrets from Secret Submission Post #367.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Unemployed and Uninterested?
Poor Role Models?
Continuously Cheats?
One night stands that refuse to man up and take responsibilities?
Skipping out on child support?

I want to hear it all. Tell me your worst!

I'll go first:
Cousins then-husband smoked A LOT when she was pregnant. Her daughter now suffers from REAL bad asthma. Now they're divorced, and he refuses to pay child support or anything. Claims to be unemployed, but makes his money selling weed so he keeps getting away with not paying his fair share. I'm also fairly certain he used to hit her (My cousin, not his daughter, who he doesn't see often enough to hit) but she won't admit it.

A real winner of a dude.

I knew this guy's dad who only told him "get in the fucking robot shinji"

:( no love

I was talking about RL deadbeat dads, but sure, wtf, we can do fictional ones as well!

Yeah, Shinji's dad was a jerk. and his relationship with Rei was VERY suspect. But then, no-one had any good parents in that show.

http://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/791922.html?thread=647987570#cmt647987570

Don't know why this pertains only to dads. My contribution is a deadbeat mom - my aunt, had a bunch of kids, alcoholic and drug-user, ran off and left her husband, came back demanding love, continued to get drunk all the time... ugh.

My flist has two deadbeat dads, one deadbeat stepdad and one deadbeat mom.

When my mom and dad got divorced I was about three. Child support was not paid for about 5 years. It took forever before the Child Support authorities enforced. As soon as my little sister turned 18, they filed for the end of the support (there was still about 20k back owed).

They moved across the country and I (and my three sisters) did not really start visiting until we were in our pre-teens. And then it was only for a couple weeks in the summer. Eventually our relationship got better. Honestly, I think they didn't like young children and was only really interested once we became teens/adults.

But bless my father for raising four girls on his own with a 9th grade education. He survived an abusive relationship with a psycho (he gained custody of my brother when he finally got rid of her) and decades of back breaking work. He now has a whole brood of grandchildren to spoil.

That's a great photo!
Big families is the best. I wouldn't mind having a lot of siblings.

Don't know him. His current wife contacted me on FB without him knowing, and I talked to him through email a handful of times. He showed no real interest in me and contact soon dropped.

Never payed a lick of child support. My mom deserved way better.

Did you decide to accept contact with his current wife? I know I'm a third party here, but it seems like she's trying to make an effort to reach out even if he failed to. I'd recommend facebook or some kind of instant messaging for your both. Emails can get lost after a while and people lose touch quickly from that.

I worked child support enforcement for eighteen years. Nothing you post here can surprise me.

Seven death threats to try to get me out of taking seven different cases to court. After the first two, I started laughing when they'd threaten me.

The very infamous Mr. Brown, who had twenty-three child support cases while I was working the county. I was in the courtroom when the judge asked him just how many more children he planned on having. He answered, "I'm not near done spreading my seed around." I know of at least three more cases we were trying to establish paternity on after that - and, guess what? Mr. Brown developed HIV. And still convinced women to sleep with him without protection. Note: This was a very small community; everyone went to the same high school, everyone knew everyone's business - so they all knew he was HIV+. I should ask my friend who still works in that area if Mr. Brown has any more cases, but I'd be afraid to.

So very many young girls coming in to my office and trying to hide that the father of their child was a teacher. Or someone else they trusted who took advantage of them. My 'favorite'? The eleven year old girl who got pregnant at the age of ten by a family friend. The girl's mother didn't understand why I called the cops on statutory rape - "He's a friend of our family!" No. No, he is not. I wish I knew why the hospital didn't call the cops. I was moved out of that office before I found out what happened with the family friend.

I still kind of cringe whenever I think about this, but when I was 12 I was friends with a girl who had a somewhat abusive father. He did the whole nine yards, but he mostly hit his wife. He pretty much never hit her while I was in the room or in earshot, but the creepiest thing I ever remember when I accidentally wandered into the kitchen for a glass of water while they were in there and saw him with his arms around her from behind. It looked like an innocent hug.

Then he looked up at me and asked me very casually, "Do you know how to set a broken rib?"

All I could do was look him in the face and tell him that yes, I did know how to tape up ribs. I don't know what he thought, maybe he was impressed that I wasn't intimidated by him or just impressed that a twelve year old knew first aid. He left after that.

A couple months later he got his wife pregnant and subsequently hit her in the stomach so hard she miscarried. I didn't stay friends with that girl very long.

But... I guess there's a happy ending here, since I heard that she left him some years later.

First of all, wow.

Second of all, can I ask how you knew how to set a broken rib?

My dad was a paramedic/ambulance driver for years before I was born. I've known a lot of basic first aid since probably about the time I was six years old.

Beyond that, I took swimming lessons for years as a child- I made it up to the highest tier under becoming an actual lifeguard (you have to pay for certification for that). Aside from CPR, a bunch of that stuff gets reinforced a little, such as placing a head board for a broken neck in water rescue situations and dealing with other broken bones.

My dad cheated on my mom, dumped a $40k business loan on her, and then convinced his mother to write me out of her will, claiming I wasn't his kid. I was one of two grandchildren for her, and she was loaded. My mom and I wouldn't have almost been homeless from the business loan; I could have gone to a better school. And he was lying. Then he fled the country to avoid paying child support. Among other things, but that's the summary.

If I had anywhere to send mail, he would have gotten a picture of my middle finger every Fathers' Day. I celebrated my (maternal) Grandpa instead.

How about horrible-human-being dads?

My cousin S is severely autistic. Asshole uncle blamed my aunt for "making him that way" and really bought into all that BS about how unloving mothers are responsible for their children's autism. S lived at home for the first part of his life, even though he was really too much for Aunt and Uncle to handle, because Aunt was a stay-at-home mom and according to Uncle "the kids are your problem." After awhile, Uncle got sick of S and shipped him off to a group home, without telling Aunt or their other kid E. Then he decided he was sick of being married, kicked Aunt and E out of the house, divorced Aunt, and refused to pay child support or medical bills for for S because "he's not a normal kid" and "Aunt made him that way." And according to him, because S was in a home, he was "the state's problem now." Never mind that in the state they lived in, quality care cost a small fortune and A, being a totally-dependent single mom, had no resources at all...

The real kicker is that Uncle knew, before getting married and having kids, that his chances of having disabled/impaired kids was sky-high. He blamed S's autism on Aunt anyway.

Years later Uncle tried to buy E's love after paying almost no attention to her since the divorce. He decided he was going to buy her a car for her 16th birthday. E lived in the middle of a large city and had no need for a car (I don't think she'd even learned to drive yet), so she suggested he put the car money in a savings account so that she could afford college. Uncle's response? "It's a car or nothing." He then didn't give her anything b/c he didn't want her selling the car and paying for silly things like food and school.

My bio-dad killed himself. My adopted/step father mental, emotional, and then sexual abused me then cheated on my mother and left her with a ton of debt. My second step-father sexual abused me and got my mom to pay HIS back child support for him.

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[ SECRET POST #2571 ]

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