[ SECRET POST #2576 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2576 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 040 secrets from Secret Submission Post #368.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[inkdust]

Ugh, can't delete from my phone.

Setting aside sentences (or worse, paragraphs) to describe a character that aren't in the natural flow of the story. Even worse, making a character remark on their own features in a way that doesn't happen, ex. "She ran her fingers through her brown hair." When you're running your fingers through your hair, unless you're the most narcissistic person ever, it's just hair.

I guess that can be boiled down to: I don't like descriptions that are obviously just included for the reader. They can run from annoying to painfully awkward for me.

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[(Anonymous)]

I don't like descriptions that are obviously just included for the reader. They can run from annoying to painfully awkward for me.

Yes. A very strong yes to this.

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[(Anonymous)]

I like to know what characters look like to some extent, though the details are rarely important. I really do dislike typical character introduction "what s/he looks like" paragraphs that follow the laundry list formula of hair, eyes, clothes, etc. I think I'd rather it be worked in more naturally, but I get what you mean by your example sentence, too.

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[inkdust]

The better quality the writing is overall, the higher tolerance I have for description, but I really want it to make sense to mention - like comparing / contrasting a physical feature of two members of a family, or looking at a significant photo. Or if a character suddenly brightens up for the first time and the narrator notices how blue/green/warm their eyes are. I think there are wonderful opportunities to sprinkle in description, but I really prefer it to be done that way, almost sneaking it in, rather than something to be established the minute we meet a character - unless their appearance is legitimately striking in some way. That's totally valid. And I'm all for a couple brief descriptors if the narrator is meeting someone for the first time. But if they look at their best friend they've known for years and mention all these physical traits? I find that off-putting because people don't do that in real life.

Wow, way to ramble. Sorry.

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[mimi-sardinia.livejournal.com]

A friend of mine let me read the editing notes on her fic, so I saw a lot of her editor's comments on how to improve the story over all. One of the things mentioned is finding ways to mentioned a salient feature, like hair colour or such, into the narrative, to help identify the character.

Like "The guardsman brushed his messy hair back as he and [Character] leaned over the map." It manages to give him a feature of messy hair, coupled with an action relevant to the hair, and given that it's being seen from [Character]'s POV, it's not the guardsman being narcissistic.

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[inkdust]

Yeah, that's a good example. Interacting with features rather than just naming them, and especially interacting with them for a specific reason and not just standing there idly. And there's definitely more opportunity for a character the narrator is seeing/talking to. The most awkward moments come when a writer desperately wants to give the narrator's appearance, because no one is there to see them.

Re: Your Storytelling Pet Peeves

[mimi-sardinia.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's kinda irrelevant when it's fanfic with canon characters, though if you're working with characters who have changed a bit from canon - like aging - you need someone else's POV on it, and over-description can happen if you're not careful. Same thing with OCs, too easy to slip into over-describing OCs if they're an important character.