fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2611 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2611 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 045 secrets from Secret Submission Post #372.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The overly long answer that still doesn't cover everything: [TL;DR version: NOPE hahahhahahaha] Looking back on my life, I can see little things that were definitely pieces of the puzzle. I can remember being four and having feelings about girls, I even thought about two women having sex (my parents gave me the talk early, but my image of sex was just two people laying in bed together naked). But at the same time, I had a crush on a boy in my preschool. The adults seemed approve when I pretended to be married to a boy, my mom would always talk about my future husband and give me dating advice (yes, this was really premature and probably contributed to a lot of issues) and it wasn't like there were any kids movies where the princess married another princess, so I figured that liking boys was what I was supposed to do. I started really questioning when I was in middle school, and that's when I started getting into fandom and reading slash and consuming any media I could get my hands on that had lesbian or bi female characters. Then all through high school my hormones were fucking crazy and I wanted to have sex with everyone. I would be "gay" one week and then announce that some guy had "turned me straight" and then be "bi" for a while. I've since stopped talking to my high school friends but in retrospect they were endlessly patient. I dated a guy, heavily flirted with another, and was too shy to approach any girls. And it's not like we didn't have gay girls at my high school. I probably could've had a girlfriend. Anyway, to finally end this tale, it wasn't until I was 20 that I finally said with certainty that I was a lesbian. I don't remember the details of how I came to that conclusion, it was after an Easter dinner where one of my cousins loudly asked if I was a lesbian because I said I wanted to go to a woman's college and everybody went dead silent. And then I went home and spent all night staring at the ceiling and introspecting. About a year later I came out to my mom because I was tired of her telling me to marry Jacoby Ellsbury (YES SHE'S VERY ODD). I haven't told this story in a long time and it's probably gonna be a long time before I tell it again because it's kind of boring to relive everything but I did not mind sharing it with you tonight.

The disappointing answer - Sexily

Your cousin is a dick.

I feel like I should say something else as well, but that's all my brain keeps coming back to.

Meh. My cousin is human. It's what lead me to self-acceptance and I think it's kind of an awkwardly amusing anecdote.

[ SECRET POST #2611 ]

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