[ SECRET POST #2638 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2638 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 055 secrets from Secret Submission Post #377.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[chardmonster]

Spoken like someone who never needs to hide their power level.

OP, the beautiful thing about fic is that absolutely nobody ever has to know you read it. You are not wearing a scarlet letter because you're suddenly into Korra slash and binged last night. You are not bringing a bound copy of When Hannibal Met Sonic to school with you. Your secret is safe!

Is this really ruining your life? Or are you worrying about nothing? Its easy to do that, but take a moment and breathe.

Also: if you reading fic would "embarass your boyfriend" to the point where its a problem, DUMP THE ASSHOLE.

[(Anonymous)]

I got the impression it was "ruining OP's life" in the sense that she can't stop reading it and it was getting in the way of other hobbies/commitments, not that she was embarrased about reading it.

That may be my bias speaking, as I used to use reading fic as a means of offsetting anxiety, and as a result read fic when I was supposed to be studying or sleeping. Fic was lovely and funny and made me feel good, but it's an awful feeling to have something eating away your time and to feel powerless to stop doing it.

OP - I feel for you. Maybe what your brain needs is a kickstart. Go for a long walk outside, take your boyfriend to the movies or an amusement park - anything to remind yourself that there's a good world outside of fiction too, and that you want to be a part of it.

[(Anonymous)]

OP here.

Yes that's very much what I meant, anon. Thank you for understanding, though I'm sorry you've had similar experiences. Your advice means a lot. I will try that approach, though I confess that there are very few activities available to me atm due to health and that itself is a source of stress and leads to fic. Did that approach work for you though?

[(Anonymous)]

It helped. I was reading fic all the time because I was unhappy all the time, so ultimately what really made the difference was resolving the broader problems (although I still binge on fic now and then when I'm miserable or avoiding something - there's no need to completely stop doing something you enjoy or that gives you comfort).

But little changes, getting out of my head and my room could really, really help. It sucks that your health is going to make that more difficult for you, but even simple things can break the spell for a while.

Try watching a movie instead of reading, or having guests over, or visiting friends or your parents (or going out and sitting with them in the evenings, if you still live at home). Stepping outside and sitting in the garden - and seeing the sun! the best thing for low mood - might even be enough. Bake something. Go for a drive or take a ride on the train while listening to music, or bring a friend or the boyfriend along. Play a board game with them. Wander around the shops. Buy a little herb garden to look after.

Whatever you are able to do, do it. And do it early in the day, so you start off well. Just a few little things that will draw you out of yourself. Remind yourself that there is a big world outside of your computer screen, that fresh air feels great in your lungs, that your body is happy when it's in motion, that getting something done (even if tht something is just finishing a dvd or not killing a basil plant) feels awesome.

I hope things get better for you, OP, I really do. I send you all the good luck and e-hugs I've got to give.

[(Anonymous)]

I will definitely try this, anon, starting today! Thank you for the advice and the good wishes. Wishing you all the best in life too. <<33

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

Obviously, whether fanfic is really ruining their life or not, they're very unhappy with themselves and their life. A therapist could provide some perspective.

[(Anonymous)]

This answer sounds like it's coming from someone who is blind to their own obsession with fic.

And yes, dump someone over one insignificant thing, that's really good advice. *rolls eyes*

[chardmonster]

I really hope you aren't promise breaker anon.

When you're dating someone who is shitty to you about your hobby, and your hobby is pretty damn innocuous, they're an asshole. You are allowed to dump assholes.

[riddian]

You are not bringing a bound copy of When Hannibal Met Sonic to school with you.

Oh damn, am I the only one who does that then?