fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2649 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2649 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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04. http://i.imgur.com/eD4bGbG.jpg
[frozen, full nudity]

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[AlternateHistory.com : Malê Rising]

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[Amelie]

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

11. [SPOILERS for Superior Spider-Man]

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12. [SPOILERS for Believe]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

13. [WARNING for rape]

[Orwell]

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14. [WARNING for rape]

[Colditz]

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15. [WARNING for child molestation]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #378.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well essentially everything you've listed is why I recommended seeing a sexologist first and sex therapist second. They're a little hard to come by, but they deal with all sorts of questions including sexual identity. They also have the benefit of talking to many, many people in a professional capacity about exactly the kind of issues you're currently struggling with.

It's not strictly necessary, of course, but it's something you may want to take into consideration if you find that you are still struggling with it and unable to come to any reconciliation.

Good luck and good journey. :)

Ah ok...I didn't realize there was a difference between a sexologist and sex therapist so thanks for clarifying that!

Thank you! :)

I do have a question if you don't mind, you obviously have experience with this kind of thing and I'm wondering what your take is on the whole asexuality thing? Do you think it's something that someone should try to change with therapy or is it more along the lines of a sexual orientation like gay/straight/bi like some people say? There seem to be differing opinions on it so I was just curious what you thought.

Well, I think there are a lot of things that factor into one's sexuality in the first place. There is certainly a genetic component that limits what kind of things one is attracted to, but on the other hand one's mental health, physical health, the kind of medications one takes and even in some cases for women a the stage of the menstrual cycle can affect sexual desire.

What I'm trying to say is I don't think it's useful to be prescriptivist when it comes to sexuality... and what I mean by that is I don't think people's tendency to say "I'm straight" or "I'm asexual" and use those labels as guidelines to behaviour is very useful or realistic (ex. assuming 'I'm straight' means 'I can never have the possibility of being attracted to a same-gender person).

That said, I don't think that trying to become more sexual is something anyone should undertake if they are not comfortable with it and it isn't something they're doing because they want to explore their body with someone else. I think that's potentially very harmful, actually.

In essence, I think there's no harm in experimenting to see where your sexuality goes, but you shouldn't feel like you need to change it if it turns out that you have no sexual feelings for anyone. Asexuality is absolutely a real sexual orientation along the same lines as gay/bi/straight for certain people, but don't take that to mean that those labels and the way you experience your sexuality necessarily needs to fall neatly under one of those orientations all the time.

Bottom line: sexuality is fluid. Who we are attracted to and how much we are attracted to people in general changes over time and with life circumstances. :)

That's really interesting so thank you! Hopefully I can figure it all out. :)

[ SECRET POST #2649 ]

Re: I think I'm in denial about my sexuality

Re: I think I'm in denial about my sexuality

Re: I think I'm in denial about my sexuality

Re: I think I'm in denial about my sexuality