[ SECRET POST #2693 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2693 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 058 secrets from Secret Submission Post #385.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ], [ 1 - blank image ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

01. http://i.imgur.com/f51jneY.jpg

[(Anonymous)]

I've never done the "fake plagiarizing" thing, but I do know how it feels to have BNF friends. Or at least I know how it feels to witness the fandom lapping at their balls every time they release any kind of fanwork, regardless of effort, when it seems like you pour your heart and soul into something and just basically get treated like you and your stuff don't even exist.

[iceyred]

This is really whiny.

[(Anonymous)]

This is Fandom!Secrets.

[(Anonymous)]

And what does it say about you that you felt it necessary to make a mean comment in response?

[(Anonymous)]

People can sense desperation. Enjoy your fandom for yourself, don't look to others for accolades/validation, and the people who are into the fun you're having will follow.

Or not, but either way, you aren't wasting the energy on others.

[souljelly]

I agree with this. It sucks not to be noticed, I've been there, but worrying about it is a surefire way to drain the fun out of fandom.

I've noticed, though, that being friends with BNFs, especially if your friendship is very public (sending asks over tumblr, them tagging you in posts and things) makes your username more recognisable. So if you talk to a lot of people like that, I'd be surprised if people didn't already recognise you, at least in passing.

[blunderbuss]

Yeah, the move away from journals has made connections and community much harder to find. I know how you feel.

[diet_poison]

I also kinda wonder if tumblr hasn't really amplified the BNF phenomenon. Not having really been there Back In The Day I don't know, but it makes sense considering the way the platform works.

[(Anonymous)]

I hate this about fandom these days. Now instead of comment threads you have endless reblog chains that you have to read backwards if you want to follow them after they've happened, if you even manage to see them in the sea of gifs and one-line text posts that take over your dash.

Tumblr is entertaining but I don't find it satisfying at all as a social network.

[(Anonymous)]

IDK, I think you have to have a certain personality, certain priorities, and certain skills to be a BNF. If you really want to be a BNF, I think you'll need to put a lot of time into it and will need some kind of skill -- you'll probably need to write a long ongoing fic or maintain a blog that you keep updated with a series of graphics or insightful meta or funny recaps or something entertaining that keeps people coming back for more.

If you mainly just don't want to be lonely, maybe expand your circle to include other smaller-name fans, or branch into a smaller fandom.

(It's also a possibility you feel more like a no-name than you are? Obviously I can't really tell, but if you're friends with people and post fic, even if it's not the kind of fic that gets all the hits and reviews, you've probably still built a small audience for yourself. IDK!)

Anyway, I'm probably not qualified to give advice since for the past few years I've been into fandoms that are so small they're basically non-existent... so I'm lonely too but not because no one pays attention to me but because there's no one at all with my interests.

[(Anonymous)]

Aw, me too, anon. . . well, I've never fake plagiarized myself, and I don't have any BNF friends, but I am Fandom Invisible, thanks to -- I guess a combination of small fandoms, gen and rare pair preferences, and writing style. Usually I'm ok with it -- fandom's my self-indulgence and I enjoy writing for its own sake. But sometimes feel a little lonely when my fics get 3 kudos out of 10 views while others get hundreds and pages of comments.

Did plagiarizing yourself make you feel better? Maybe I'll try it. :\

[(Anonymous)]

I got 1 kudo out of a 100 views my fic must have been on par with My Immortal then ahaha

[(Anonymous)]

I've seen quite a few BNFs that dropped off the face of the earth and within a week, the fandom didn't care (hope those mommy erotica books are working out for you, but I'm not buying any). Fandom is fickle so don't stress too much about it.

[elaminator]

I'm not sure how true that is! Some people underestimate their popularity. However, even if no one would miss you...

There are so many people in fandom (well, depending on what fandom) and in the more popular fandoms fic writers feel endless, so I wouldn't take it personal.

If it makes you feel any better, I rarely notice who writes the fics I read. The ones I do remember are usually because they're multifandom, post a lot and get rec'd constantly. I can really only think of one or two off the top of my head...

[littlestbirds]

Not everyone cares about the popularity game though. You're probably noticed by people, you just want them to notice you and talk about you in a different way. Sounds a bit petty to me.

[(Anonymous)]

Did I write this secret in my sleep? Well, except I've never plagiarized myself. It's kind of like a "always the bridesmaid, never the bride" type of feeling. You work hard, pour your heart and soul into your works...

And it feels like nobody cares, even if you do get some fans, because you don't have as many as your BNF buddies.

I've just worked hard to learn to appreciate my tiny following, because they may be few, but they brighten my day when I'm down on myself the most.

Hang in there, OP! Maybe someday you'll have a breakout work and BAM! You'll be a BNF, too. :)

[(Anonymous)]

My suggestion would be to do some non-fandom things. I wouldn't give up fandom completely, just, you know, hit the gym. Go for a walk. Talk to someone new face-to-face. Read some non-fiction. Attend a church service of your choosing (maybe, I don't trust churches very much). Volunteer for a cause that interests you. The possibilities are endless.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm going through something very similar, OP. (I even was considering making a similar secret)

I had (or have?) a good friend who has recently achieved BNF status, and it's been almost three months since I last heard about her. I know she's busy and has a LOT of asks on her inbox, but... I miss her. I haven't told her anything, as I don't want to appear as needy.

Also, I do have a little more than a hundred followers, but I think it means nothing. I've tried talking to some of them, leave messages, idk, trying to making connections, but to no avail. No one seems to care and to be honest, I do feel lonely. *sigh*

Some of the answers to this secret have really good advice, though. I hope both you and me are able to feel better soon *hugs*

[pts]

I know that feel.

A former BNF:

[(Anonymous)]

Having been a BNF in the 'old LJ' days back when it was decent and pre LJ days when all we had was ff.net and yahoo mail, and now have dropped out of fandom almost entirely for personal reasons. (F!S is most of my fandom experience right now.) I prefer being invisible. Being a BNF is a lot of stress. There is the supposedly constant need to put out work. You have to be available. Then other BNF's who may not even know that well tend to get catty. You try to organize something and invite everyone to get involved and then get accused of favoritism when only certain people show up even though those accusing of you did get an invite to participate. You google your name and come across reviews of your works that are more or less hateful ripping apart of you and your character instead of the story. Being "Known" is not what it is cracked up to be. It turned into work, not fun.

What I got the most out of it was the rare review that brightened my day because I made someone else feel better with what I was doing. Knowing that I was going to post the next chapter of my fic made someone out there have a better day. I also got a great friend who is my friend in more than just fandom, fandom brought us together but we're beyond that now.

The best advice is find your niche and determine what you want to get out of fandom, then give it.

[augustbird]

sorry to hear this, op. :/

not sure what fandom you're in but i agree with one of the posters above that it's hard to get a foothold into big fandoms because there's a ton of fic being produced all at once. maybe look into writing in a smaller fandom for a while? i know i read a lot more widely in smaller fandoms because there's not a torrent of stuff getting created every day and it feels much more manageable to get through.

i'm not sure how long you've been writing, but maybe that plays a factor too. i feel like most of the fanfic writers i look up to have been at it for at least a decade. in my experience, i didn't become a decent writer until i massively overhauled my writing style thanks to creative writing courses i took at college--maybe look into getting some constructive criticism of your work to figure out where you need to improve?

lastly, i think it's really hard to write stuff and not get demotivated when you're comparing yourself up against other people who are getting a lot of attention. i guess this is where i suggest either writing in smaller fandoms or writing for big fandoms but posting on sites (lj, dw) where you know you'll get a limited audience/not posting at all so you don't have to feel bad about comparing yourself to other people. write to get the hang of the characters and write to improve--write for yourself, i guess, is what i'm saying.

also a lot of what gets popular and what doesn't revolves around what fics hit the major tropes/kinks rather than what's quality. most of my favorite fics that are gorgeously written get relatively little to no recognition. and don't forget that a lot of it has to do with sheer luck.

i hope you're not too discouraged, op! but if it's really getting to you, i definitely suggest stepping away from fandom for a while and doing some other stuff for a while.

[(Anonymous)]

for whatever reason, when I join a fandom I tend to end up, if not a BNF, a medium name fan. Probably because I started out BNF in one fandom so when I go somewhere else there are already people who know me? But anyway, the VAST majority of my followers and fans are just background noise. I only really care about talking to my friends. They're the important ones. If I make a post and I don't get any notes except one from a close friend, that's better than getting a thousand from randos I've never even met. So don't feel lonely. You are worth more to your friends than their fans.

[(Anonymous)]

It does help if your fandoms are tiny, because then it's some consolation that hardly anyone will even read your fics in the first place. I mean, my smallest "fandom" consists of people writing one or two fics a year, my second smallest has a lot of people but not many who care to read fic, and my third smallest is probably the one that gets me kudos and reviews, but only if I write about the main team. So it might be that you're writing about minor characters or rarepairs.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, even if you feel like your fics get no reviews (and it SUCKS, trust me), write for love of the source material rather than trying to become popular.

[blownwish]

Much empathy there. And I've done way worse than just faux plagiarizing. Sometimes I would impress other non BNFs with all the people I knew. Sometimes I would think to myself about how i introduced certain BNFs to a fandom they became BNFs in, then told myself they were so mainstream. Yeah, I was the hipster fix writer. Sad and silly.