fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2694 ]

[ SECRET POST #2694 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2694 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[General Hospital]

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03.

[Homestuck, The Other Woman, Pacific Rim, Naruto, X-Men]

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04.

[The Ear, the Eye and the Arm]

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05.

[Warehouse 13]

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06.

[Alton Brown and Anthony Bourdain]

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07.

[YU-NO: A Girl Who Chants Love at the Bound of This World]

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08.

[Star Trek: The Next Generation]

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09.

[Magic: the Gathering]

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10.

[Smallville]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 046 secrets from Secret Submission Post #385.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 2 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I went to a religious school where the dress code was knee-length dark skirt of your choice - but idgi, obviously the people in this school CHOSE this school, and they should know what the requirements are, so why be incensed over the dress code? Obviously it's not the right school for you, and that's fine.

(incidentally, it was an all-girls school so there was no issue about contrasting with the boys)

That works fine for, say, college, and maybe even high school. But if you're a middle schooler and your parents are the ones choosing? It can really, really suck. I mean, I suppose you could just flaunt the rules somehow and get kicked out, but that's pretty drastic if you care at all about future educational prospects.

Well tbh religious schools here do actually screen candidates, and they interview the girls apart from their parents to establish if they're actually the right match for the school. And this happens before middle school, because here usually middle-high is linked.

Then again, I'm not somebody who thinks that being told what to wear for a few hours is tEH WORST THING EVARRR. Big whoop, they can wear whatever they want after school and on weekends. What, you think I loved the shirt colors we had to choose from?

AYRT

I guess I'm coming from a different place. (Namely, non-gender-conforming female going to secular private school.) I guess my school also screened candidates, but it was a purely academic thing. Also, there's no way in hell that most of the parents at my school would have let their kids opt out because they objected to the uniform.

I'm the anon above who argued about wearing a skirt in middle school. If I'd been forced to wear a skirt every day at school, I *probably* would have dealt with it, but I'm certain that I'd have been significantly less motivated, and my schoolwork may have suffered. It might seem silly, but I've found that being forced to dress in a feminine manner actively makes me unhappy, in a small but very real way.

When I say screening, the thing is, over here dressing a certain way is tied to being part of a certain segment of religious society, where it's mostly still accepted that women wear skirts*

(*there are a lot of complexities, but I'm simplifying)

Therefore, if you consider yourself part of religious society, it should mean that you generally accept that women mostly wear skirts, and if you wish to be educated in a religious institution it's expected that you know that it will adhere to the norms of religious society.

It's not so much objecting to the uniform as screening if the child is religious or not.

Yeah, I can see where you're coming from on that one. I'm not Muslim, but if I wanted to go to a Muslim school, I would assume that their dress code would include that I needed to cover my hair and have most of my skin covered; they're a religious school, their religion says that women need to dress like that. That's not unreasonable. (In your case, though, if the child doesn't want to be at that school, obviously that changes things.)

How often does the kid get to choose their school, though? And even then, where's the harm in letting girls wear pants, seriously?

As I posted elsewhere on the thread, religious schools do screen for religious-ness. If the kid is truly not religious (even if the parents are), they may not be accepted, or strongly encouraged to find a different school.

As for the harm, it's not about "harm", it's about if you choose a school that is part of a certain way of life, you are making the choice to accept the relevant tenets.

not all religious schools screen

*religious schools where I come from

This isn't a choice a public school gets to make.

Or even a private one really, developing people into upstanding citizens is too important to let their minds get poisoned by something which sounds positively medieval when they're at their most formative stages.

Wait, what? Who was choosing? The kids or the parents? Are we talking pre-college, and the kids are picking their school?

We are talking pre-college, and in these schools parents are strongly discouraged from pushing their child to it if the child isn't suited to the school or doesn't want to be there. In addition, the children are interviewed separately from their parents to establish if they're a good fit.
I'm not saying that sometimes parents don't mess up and push children to institutes they don't want to be in, but generally the feel is that they're trying to keep the religious school for religious people who want to be there.

Ok, to be completely honest, it sounds like your school is a major exception in that regard. Most religious schools don't have that kind of rigorous entry interview thing, and not all kids are happy to be going to a religious school, or any other private school for that matter.

as far as I know, most religious schools in the area have similar policies.

In reality kids being pushed to attend a school they don't want to isn't actually the school's fault, and the school shouldn't have to change their policy based on parents forcing unwanted decisions on the child. Either way the problem there is with the family, not the school.

Also I should add, these schools aren't private, they're fully public schools.

I'm not sure what your area is, but I think it's safe to say not all areas are like that.

I'm not saying private schools should change their policy because kids don't like it, but I'm saying it's completely fair for kids to resent a uniform for a school they didn't even want to go to. In that case yes, the main problem is with the parents.

You saying these schools are public actually changes it a lot. Were there other options for kids who didn't want to go to those schools to go somewhere else? Especially considering it's a religious school? (also now I'm curious to where you are from)

I never said that all schools are like this, I was purely talking about my own experience. This is how the system in Israel works.
There are public secular schools, public religious schools, and public arab schools. There is a "base curriculum" of certain subjects which all schools must teach in order to be considered public and get support from the government, but outside of that they have a certain amount of freedom in choosing which subjects to teach and how much of an emphasis to put on them.

The high school diploma is given based on matriculation, and you can matriculate in almost all subjects, including the religious ones, in government-overseen examinations.

For homeschooling and such, there is also the possibility of doing "external" examinations, meaning matriculating without going to school, so you get a high school diploma without having to actually go to school.

Ah, ok. I got the impression from your first comment that you were defending uniforms in general based on your experiences. Sorry, I think I misread it.

Thanks for the explanation :)

Well, I do personally think that people make a much bigger deal over uniforms than necessary, and that wearing clothes that don't reflect you for a few hours a day is not the worst thing ever. I think it stems from a culture that increasingly demands to be able to do what I want when I want otherwise I am oppressed, and I disagree with this fundamentally.

I can accept that other people feel differently on the subject.

I don't think anyone is saying that you're "oppressed" for having to wear a uniform...at least nobody here.

I'm kind of confused now as to whether that was ultimately your point, or not.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2694 ]

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