[ SECRET POST #2753 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2753 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 016 secrets from Secret Submission Post #393.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[anonymous4]

Manpain doesn't mean 'pain experienced by a man', though.

Manpain is when a character's wife (or husband)/partner/child/friend is harmed and the character says "Waaaaaah, you've hurt ME!" instead of "Waaaaaah, you hurt THEM!"

And it's uncomfortable to read/watch it, even when you can't quite put your finger on what's wrong.

[(Anonymous)]

This is a really good explanation.

[(Anonymous)]

THIS. this exactly. i wish more people used this definition.

the thing that makes me so uncomfortable is that it's ALL about them, and not about the other characters either. the other characters become mere cardboard cutouts to be killed off. no thought is given to the pain of the loved ones.

and it makes the protagonist come across as selfish and childish. this is someone we're supposed to sympathise with, but dealing with grief in this way (ESPECIALLY when the death of loved ones is something everyone has to deal with in life), serves to alienate the audience from the character.

[(Anonymous)]

I heard that as the real definition of manpain a long time ago, and it made sense when I heard it. The trouble is that in all that time I haven't seen or been able to think of a real example it. Instead people call it manpain and treat any emotional reaction from the man as "making it all about HIIIIIIIM."

[(Anonymous)]

Ah, unless "How could I let this happen to her? I HATE MYSELF" counts. That's the closest thing I've actually seen to a man making a woman's suffering about him.

[anonymous4]

I think Dr Who exhibits quite a lot of manpain, especially the tenth doctor. For example, when he has to wipe Donna's memory, because she can't survive having his knowledge, we're given a close up of David Tennant's face, which makes it seem as though the message isn't "Poor Donna, she has a time bomb in her head," but "Poor me, I lose all my companions."

[lentils]

I really wasn't fond of Ten before that, because of how he treated Martha mostly, but oh my god that scene was the nail in the coffin for me. I also didn't like how he DIDN'T LISTEN TO HER SAYING "NO DON'T DO IT" because watching her die would make him too sad. buuuut anyway, enough about my feelings lol.

[(Anonymous)]

It's definitely there in a lot of shows. I don't know anyone who watches Nashville and the fandom is almost nonexistent but the character Deacon is a perfect example of this bullshit.

[darkmanifest]

Exactly this. Especially when the character's manpain is so glorified that even when they played a role in getting that person killed through their own selfishness and stupidity, neither the narrative nor the other characters ever calls them out on it. Because they feel bad, and their feelings trump absolutely everything else.

See: The main character of Watch Dogs. Oh, sure, brother dearest, you got my daughter killed by fucking around, and your continued fucking around for pointless vengeance is putting what's left of my family in danger, but we cool, we cool.

[cloud_riven]

Yep yep. Like at what point does the suffering of the victims get some spotlight, or even the grief of others outside the MC?

Spoilers I guess for Walking Dead show, but there was that time Glenn would not let up on how the Governor stripped Maggie(sp?) and threatened her, and I was wondering if the show would keep going the "Oooh how dare he do something to my wife, because that makes me so powerless and stuff." Even the host and guests during the aftershow noted it, rebutting a fan's question of when glenn would get revenge to when Maggie would. Thankfully the show actually didn't go that route, and even had Maggie tell Glenn upfront that he was the one making it all about him iirc.