[ SECRET POST #2776 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2776 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 085 secrets from Secret Submission Post #397.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[ariakas]

It's... kind of sad that you didn't realize that there was more to life while you were in fandom.

[(Anonymous)]

+1

[(Anonymous)]

Pretty much.

[(Anonymous)]

Believe it or not, not everyone has this awareness when they jump into fandom.

And for some people, fandom is the one thing in their life that doesn't suck shit.

[ariakas]

That's still sad though.

[(Anonymous)]

And that's sad. Not "sad" in the derogatory way, "sad" in the "man that sucks, hope things get better" way.

[(Anonymous)]

I actually didn't take that part literally? Should I have? I thought they just meant they realized how much time they'd wasted. Like when people are worried about something, and go "you know what, there's more to life than just worrying about this" and move on, or try to move on.

[ariakas]

People "waste time" doing all kinds of shit, though. I've met (and later visited) friends from across the globe through fandom, and even gained professional contacts through shared "fandom" hobbies like meta-analysis and vidya gaem playing. People in fandom still have spouses, kids, degrees, professional careers, etc., like anyone else with any other pasttime. It's sad that the OP didn't realize that these things weren't incompatible then they started.

[kallanda_lee]

This so much - and I ate how there's this assumption the one rules out the other. Nah, you can like fic, love movies, series, books and other fiction , and have a full life outside of that.

[(Anonymous)]

Also, it's really okay to prefer fic, movies, series, books, and other fiction to other things. There's more than one way to have a good life. I think it's good to force yourself to do new things from time and time and experience lots of things, because otherwise you won't know what fulfills you the most, but if you decide that it's the more "solitary" things, then there shouldn't be anything wrong with that. It shouldn't be seen as wasting life.

[(Anonymous)]

Well, if that's all that you're doing, then yes, it is wasting life.

[(Anonymous)]

So what should they be doing instead? This whole idea of 'wasting life' or 'wasting time' is one I don't really understand because it comes down to the idea of what you should be doing instead and that's highly subjective. I could consider it wasting time to watch sports while the person who does so finds it an enjoyable hobby. Some people think not working is wasting time while others look back on 30 yrs at their corporate job and declare that they wasted time. If you get hit by a bus at 30 was that time you spent at the gym to stay healthy and live a long life a waste of time? It's a ridiculous concept on its face.

[(Anonymous)]

You seem like one of those people who uses the phrase 'just to say we did' a lot.

[(Anonymous)]

No, it's really not. But you know what is? Constantly forcing yourself to do things that you know you don't enjoy and don't want to do just to prove to other people that you're not "wasting your life."

[ketita]

fwiw, I think for some people it's difficult to balance the two, or they just get sucked into fandom life and don't resurface much. If that's the case for OP, I'm glad they're happy now - but it's not the case for everyone...

[(Anonymous)]

This. Fandom is and always has been just one aspect of my social life. You shouldn't have to leave it or "grow out of it" to realize that.

[riddian]

This was pretty much my thought.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

Bad phrasing on my part. To be more precise, I should have said I have grown out of the fandom part of my life.

Re: OP

[quirkytizzy]

This was sort of my thought. As in, how old were you when you were most entrenched in fandom? If it was your teens or younger, then it's natural that learning there was more to life might have come LATER. Teenagers can be pretty myopic in the things we find meaning in.

Re: OP

[(Anonymous)]

OP

Teenage years, definitely. :) Althoughit was a case of being a myopic teenager (and I really was) compounded by using fandom as escapism (bad home life).