fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2813 ]

[ SECRET POST #2813 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2813 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Vocaloid]

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03.

[Homestuck]

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04.

[Luke Evans, Dracula Untold]

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05.

[Guardians of the Galaxy]

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06.

[John Green]

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07.

[Ace Attorney: The Adventures of Ryunosuke Naruhodou]

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08.

[Legend of Korra]

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09.

[Paul Hollywood of The Great British Bake-Off]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 038 secrets from Secret Submission Post #402.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Dear Ill Omened,

Your father and I have decided to purchase two shipping containers for storage purposes. We're just sorting out placement and contractors.

- mother dearest

How much stuff do they have that they need two shipping containers for storage?

Is two shipping containers a lot? Like are they a really big specific type of container? Because I am picturing generic plastic boxes.

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-15 23:20 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-15 23:25 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-15 23:28 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

ill_omened - 2014-09-15 23:38 (UTC) - Expand

They're pretty much permanently hosting someone else who's a packrat, and look after a lot of animals I suppose?

But yes, I don't know either.

What? Why not just rent storage space at one of those storage-mart type places?

I guess they've got a decent amount of land, are looking for some long term solutions, and it's cheaper then you would expect/there's no required planning permission.

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-15 23:38 (UTC) - Expand

I sort of lose track, my family is sort of weird, especially if you count extended family and the bf's clan.

But, the thing that struck me as weird: my nephew is apparently now dating a girl with the same name as his younger sister (my niece). Like, I get that this can happen, but I think it would sort of weird me out if my love interest was named the same as a close relative. It's not even a really common name, either.

My best friend had a crush on her dance partner who had the same name as her little brother and it never stopped weirding her out. Obviously not enough to stop liking him, but I think she was glad to get over him. It was a fairly common name, though.

A friend of mine has a brother named Brian who married a girl called Jane. Jane has a brother named Brian who also married a girl called Jane. Life is weird!

I don't know if I could. I mean, well, if they went by my brother's first name I'd have trouble, but at least my brother exclusively uses the full version of his first name, and it's not that common used that way, but the short version is much more common and I think if he just stuck with the short version it'd be ok.

My dad is another matter - both the short and full versions of his name are common, and it would be really weird for me.

Extended family would be somewhat less weird and I could probably handle it.

We have at least two of them, but that's because my dad keeps tons of spare parts around because he has so many types of work machines that he never knows what may break and he's got to have certain things pretty handy.

My older brother went with his sugar mama to China to find a manufacturer for his clothing line. This is after they went to London and Turkey for that same reason. His last business plan read that his company will 'crush the competition.'

He's a dirtbag, so when this blows up in his face I'll have popcorn ready.

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

scrubber - 2014-09-16 03:45 (UTC) - Expand

I have a friend whose mother has a few shipping containers worth of stuff on her rural property because she's moved house a lot in the last few years. This seems normal to me because of that.

Some family up North has security cameras on the outside of their house. They are convinced a family member that died last year is visiting them in ghost form. I don't have the heart to tell them that what they are seeing is dust/insects.

I'm not entirely sure whether that's sad or funny (or both). Are the cameras installed to help facilitate communication with the ghosts, or is it to keep the ghosts away?

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

kaijinscendre - 2014-09-15 23:53 (UTC) - Expand

...Have they never seen dust or insects before?

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

kaijinscendre - 2014-09-15 23:55 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

kallanda_lee - 2014-09-16 00:06 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-16 05:42 (UTC) - Expand

I had lunch with my mom today and she said a bunch of weird shit.

Like "I don't understand how any woman can be a lesbian, penises are so wonderful!"

And how lesbians can't have sex with each other because there are no penises involved and if they use strap-ons then they must not really be lesbians and that vaginas "close up if they go too long without being used" and I can't even remember what other crazy shit.

In the past she's also said bisexuality can't be real because "men and women are so different, how can you possibly be into both?" and how people can just magically be interested in the other gender if they want to.

She has some...weird thoughts about sexuality.

I would've been tremendously curious to ask her how she thinks straight men can be attracted to women, if "penises are so wonderful"?

Admittedly that's only scratching the surface of the weirdness, but it seems like a logical starting point.

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-16 00:21 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

inkdust - 2014-09-16 00:25 (UTC) - Expand

"Weird" is putting it mildly. I'd find it downright offensive and anger-inducing. :( Not to mention it's just...wrong. (Vaginas closing up? What the actual fuck?)

Edited 2014-09-16 01:21 (UTC)

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-16 01:47 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

diet_poison - 2014-09-16 02:28 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-16 02:44 (UTC) - Expand

You might ask her how women can be way into Benedict Cumberbatch, but still be all right married to someone who isn't Benedict Cumberbatch. Also, you might pity your mother, seeing as how she's never heard of or experienced cunnilingus. :-/

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

(Anonymous) - 2014-09-16 21:26 (UTC) - Expand

Procreated. God damn breeders.

/eyeroll

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

herpymcderp - 2014-09-16 01:50 (UTC) - Expand

Re: weirdest thing your family have done recently

diet_poison - 2014-09-16 02:28 (UTC) - Expand

This happened after telling a funny story to my mom about my coworker's rent-a-kid business idea.*

Me: Hey, I could make Grandma-I-Never-See really happy by convincing her I've reproduced!
Mom: That still won't get you an inheritance!
Me: ...what? You know this is all a joke, right? (Grandma knows I'm single and queer and adamantly childfree, even if she's baby rabid).
Mom: It doesn't matter, you're not getting an inheritance because we're going to make sure it's all spent! (I'm not sure who "we" are in this context - my mom and her siblings, maybe?)
Me: ...if she wants to spend HER OWN money, that's her decision (and one I support, honestly)
Mom: OK, but you need to know we're not giving you anything!

What makes this really fucked up? We're poor. None of us has extra cash, no one owns any property, and Grandma is the tenacious type who'll probably outlive a few of her grandkids. In fact, I earn more than both my parents combined. I'm doing pretty okay, I don't need their money.

*The rent-a-kid business: childless/childfree adults borrow kids who look like them for "family pictures" to send to breed-happy relatives who won't take "no kids" for an answer. Yeah, not the sort of thing that's ever going to happen in reality because creepy.

Weird. Having kids as part of an inheritance scheme seems convoluted, at best.

On a similar note, I come from a family with no money. Sometimes my mom jokingly threatens to cut me out of the will. I roll my eyes and reply with "Oh no, what will I do without that $50."

On the upside, at least everyone knows no one is sucking up for the sake of a non-existent inheritance. :)

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