case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2014-11-08 03:35 pm

[ SECRET POST #2867 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2867 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 088 secrets from Secret Submission Post #410.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - random image ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Re: Topics you hate.

(Anonymous) 2014-11-09 04:16 am (UTC)(link)
Try having awesome sex with/by yourself. :) I'm not gonna lie, having sex with other people can be pretty great (although it's also a lot more trouble than jerking off ...), but sex with yourself can absolutely be awesome too.

There's no reason a lack of available partners should keep you from figuring out your own likes and dislikes and having a great time experiencing yourself. Knowing your own preferences also definitely helps when it comes to having sex with other people, even though it obviously doesn't translate 1:1.

Re: Topics you hate.

(Anonymous) 2014-11-09 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, believe me, I've had no issues with doing that. Quite frequently, for quite some time.

But, with all due respect, it's hard for me to see it as even remotely the same thing, and the idea of talking about masturbation as sex with yourself seems honestly kind of preposterous. Obviously it's difficult or impossible for me to talk about this in a meaningful way, because I have no experience with it (as see previous) and therefore don't have any firsthand knowledge to judge by. That said, it seems to me that there would be so much difference with the presence of another human being and just the physical immediacy of the situation, you know? The emotional and physical reality of it that I just don't know. At the very least, that's what I worry about. Along with, obviously, the other things that go along with that.

Re: Topics you hate.

(Anonymous) 2014-11-09 03:04 pm (UTC)(link)
There's no set progression from masturbating to making out to frottage to oral to vaginal/anal. Your experiences with one particular sex act stand on their own. I had sex, and then a few years after I stopped having it again, I finally started feeling comfortable in my own skin wrt my sexual wants.

Yes, the physicality of being touched by another person is definitely different. I wouldn't gauge it to be automatically superior. Some things feel better when I do them, some things feel better when a partner does them. In general, the partial unexpectedness of stimulation from a partner is definitely a different kind of sexual experience than the things you can do to yourself - but then again, the reverse is true. A partner can never quite react to your sensory input the way you can. They're different, and as someone who's had sex and who currently wanks a lot, I can't say I prefer one over the other solidly.

From the emotional angle, there's something powerful and cool about getting someone else off (not so much about getting come in your eye, but I digress). Then again, actually focusing on myself - not on getting off, but just on spending a few hours with nice music and a candle, making myself feel good? Acknowledging that I don't need a reason to do this other than because I want to? That can be pretty powerful stuff.

If you really want to have sex with partners, I wish you good luck with that and hope you collect some amazing experiences and impressions. Just don't think you're somehow incomplete because it hasn't happened for you yet.