fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2917 ]

[ SECRET POST #2917 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2917 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 040 secrets from Secret Submission Post #417.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I realized tonight that I don't feel insulted if someone says I'm unethical, immoral, or potentially not a good person, but most people do. It's really insulting to most people. But my response is, "well, am I unethical, immoral, or not a good person?" And then, "why does this person think that about me? Does it make sense when I try to see things from their POV?"

It's weird to me that this is how I react but it's not how most people react. I guess I want to ask how people feel when they're told those things. Why is it so upsetting?

Is this because of herpesmcderp's self-righteous meltdown over people eating meat?

DA

What did I miss...?

ayrt

It's about something I noticed and feel strange and confused about.

Speaking just for myself here, but it wasn't the accusation of acting I'm morally that annoyed me here. I had a long and basically rational conversation with herpy about why I disagreed about that. It was the part about him being so much better than everyone else and everyone who disagreed with him being a selfish child that annoyed me.

It's because you're a better person than us.

No. I don't think I get mad at people saying something that I'm doing is immoral as such. There are things that are around that statement that can make me angry, and there are times when I can consider that accusation wildly incorrect or hypocritical, and that would pass me off. But in itself, no, it doesn't bother me.

ayrt

What's weird is that even if I think it's incorrect or hypocritical, it still doesn't piss me off. I'm really calm and passive about it, and based on what I've seen I think that's kind of weird.

Well hey you do you I guess

To be clear I think it would have to be wildly and almost intentionally incorrect to piss me off. But at a certain point I think you almost have to take it as an attack. At least I do.

i don't really care tbh

people who use immoral and its ilk tend be too concerned being scrupulous for my liking

Well, I've struggled with self-esteem and finding my place among people for a long time, so people's approval is important to me. I try to restrict this to only the people who are important to me, but up to a point it's almost like a survival instinct.

On a broader level, I still think it's a societal self-defense mode. We're trained to see those who are immoral as outsiders and not-quite-people.

My response is pretty much "Well, of course I am, but what makes you think you're better?"

Could be a case of that stereotypical "truth hurts the most" thing. The people that feel most insecure about their own morals/ethics are get the most upset and defensive about it.

I don't think it's weird that you don't. I've made peace with he fact that I'm no saint. I try to be the best person I can according to my own moral code, but even then sometimes I'm just... not. I disappoint myself sometimes then, but I couldn't care less about other people's judgements of me, because a lot of people have crazy morals that I have no interest in trying to keep and besides, the best people in the world are still pretty bad people sometimes, so it's ridiculous to get that upset over something.

I get you. To me, it takes a particular arrogance to think others must accept your self-righteousness, or to never consider another's pov and not being able to make peace with that. It's not a matter of having to forfeit your beliefs and convictions, just self-reflection.

Basically we should all be the dude and relax some.

Usually, I brush it off until I have time to fully consider it later. A lot of the time I ignore it if it's a viewpoint based solely on arbitrary moral values*. On various occasions it's made me change my behaviour when I've realized that they had a point, and though their assumptions weren't fully correct they had enough basis in reality that I needed to modify my own perspective.

*religious beliefs

oh fucking please. if that were all that'd be one thing, but you are the most judgemental and hypocritical motherfucker on fandom secrets

you even make dethtoll look good, and he's a fucking asshole

I like dethtoll. :(

I usually do, but he's been an asshole lately.

lol

Denouncing a specific belief, idea, opinion or practice that you disagree with is perfectly legitimate.

Denouncing someone as an all-around bad person because they disagree with you on one issue is, number one, presumptuous--nobody is so perfect that they have the right to look down their noses at others--and number two, usually not very logical.

Any human being's life will be made up of millions of different thoughts, feelings, opinions, beliefs and actions. Sometimes even a generally benign, sympathetic, and well-intentioned person will legitimately manage to end up on what looks to you or me, at that moment in time, like the wrong side of a particular issue. But this one item does not summarize their entire existence. People just can't be summed up so easily.

tl;dr: Nobody's perfect. Hate the sin, not the sinner (and don't presume to be the authority on what constitutes sin, either.)

I think it's upsetting because most people think of themselves as essentially good people. Yes, with faults and flaws, but... essentially good. So implying that maybe their closely held ideal of themselves is incorrect can be very upsetting. I think it's why most people never think of themselves as racist or bigoted even when they hold opinions that are pretty damn racist and bigoted. It's because they know that being racist is bad, and they're not a bad person so therefore, the accuser is wrong and an asshole, etc.

For myself, I'm well aware that there are many views I hold that are sort of morally gray. I try to be a good person, but I know I don't always succeed and that if I fail, it generally is my own fault and not anyone else's. So being called unethical doesn't really do more than annoy me.

It depends on what action they're calling you out as immoral, unethical, or downright shitty behavior. If it's an opinion you're holding over a political issue or something unrelated to your own life, the person is overreacting and I can see why you wouldn't care if you were called that. Same if it's a clash with religious beliefs or whatnot.

However, if someone raped, mugged, killed, abused, or otherwise caused emotional distress and/or physical harm to another person and showed no remorse or didn't care if they were labeled immoral? That person is most likely a sociopath. Likewise anyone who sat on the sidelines and found these actions done to another as their source of entertainment is at the very least an asshole who is going to be detested by anyone with a conscience.

So yeah, it depends on why a person is being labeled that. It could range from being normal in brushing it off to being a sociopath.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2917 ]

Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing

Re: Something I realized and would like to talk about if anyone is willing