[ SECRET POST #2925 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2925 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 046 secrets from Secret Submission Post #418.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Is this a situation you find yourself in a lot? Because if so, you really might want to work on adjusting your reaction or being honest about how you feel. Because it's not very nice to ignore entirely or react with the complete and total disinterest that "meh" implies. Were I a part of that friendship, I suspect I'd begin to feel undervalued and unappreciated and would not stay in it for long.

[(Anonymous)]

Sure if you need constant validation in yourself and your interests, a friendship with you might be in danger. But honestly it doesn't sound like any big loss based on this comment.

[(Anonymous)]

Or maybe they could talk about other things?

[(Anonymous)]

They could, but it's been my experience that people who behave this way about one thing, also behave this way about other things. I'm not saying my experience is the only one, it's just a different perspective that bears acknowledgment.

[diet_poison]

that is a very shortsighted thing to say - wouldn't you want to find out if that's true or not? or if you talked about a dozen things and then there's this ONE thing that makes them go "meh", would you just assume they're going to be like this forever?

[(Anonymous)]

No, I wouldn't just assume that, which would be why I asked OP the question.

[diet_poison]

wow really? you'd leave a friendship just because someone doesn't want to talk about who they're attracted to

wtf

[(Anonymous)]

No. I'd leave a friendship that felt one-sided and like my thoughts and feelings warranted disinterest at best or were outright ignored at worst, which is what OP was doing in this instance. And if that treatment spread beyond that specific scenario and into other facets of our friendship, yes, you better believe I would leave and find friends who treat me like I'm worth something to them.

[diet_poison]

I got the strong impression that the "treatment" did not spread to other facets of the friendship since this secret wasn't about friendships at all, it's about OP's reluctance to talk about this one particular thing. I think you're reading waaaaay too much into it.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh, fuck off with trying to make me feel like I'm doing something wrong. If I were "reading waaaaaaay to much into it" I'd be making statements, not asking questions.

[diet_poison]

did I hit a nerve or something? that's a pretty unwarranted level of hostility you got going there.

(but ok, if you don't want to talk about it, I won't)

[(Anonymous)]

Whatever. I don't think it's unwarranted when you (repeatedly now) try to invalidate my thoughts on a matter.

[diet_poison]

I wasn't trying to invalidate your thoughts and I honestly don't think I said anything that could be reasonably construed that way.

[(Anonymous)]

IA but more on the honesty level. If OP doesn't feel comfortable talking about it and to the point where they lie about their faves, they should just tell the people they are talking about it to they don't want to. There are other aspects to fandom life other than who's hot or not to talk about.

What I don't get is why they person they are talking to this about isn't more self aware that OP obviously don't like the subject. From their description it sounds like they are pretty repellent to the subject matter and if they kept doing it I doubt I'd want to talk to them about it again after getting an ton of detached responses.

[diet_poison]

Yeah, this. They should be straightforward about it. But really, it's just one small thing they don't want to talk about.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

I actually love to talk, and my friends often say I'm a good listener, I can talk about stuff that I personally don't find interesting, I'm not ignoring my friends. It's just this one thing I can't force myself to talk about, I don't know why I find it so embarassing. I have no problem saying when I think someone of the same gender is attractive, it's weird.

Re: OP

[(Anonymous)]

OK, that's cool. Glad to hear it.