fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2931 ]

[ SECRET POST #2931 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2931 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 064 secrets from Secret Submission Post #419.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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People who complain about "microaggressions."

I don't give a fuck.

You just sound like a thin-skinned whiner to me.

Ironically, I tend to judge people who call other people "thin-skinned" or some variation, just a little bit. (Similarly, people who whine about stuff being "too PC")

I just can't be assed to care anymore. I've experienced microaggressions myself and they're no fun, but they're hardly something to get up in arms about.

After you've had whole life overturned and threatened, you find it hard to care about the little things -- the "inconvenient bullshit" as I call it.

It's fine if you don't care. Calling other people think-skinned because they care still bothers me, though.

Technically, I didn't say they ARE thin-skinned whiners. I say they SOUND like thin-skinned whiners to me. And that's just the simple truth. I'm not gonna lie and say I don't roll my eyes when I see it. Go ahead and complain, but just don't ask me to care.

That's just pedantic. And okay.

Is everyone only permitted to care about the things you care about, to the exact same degree as you do? Does that seem reasonable to you?

Did I say they couldn't complain? No. I said they SOUND like thin-skinned whiners to me and that I judge them as such (which is true). And that I don't give a fuck -- which is also the truth.

I don't give a fuck about Nascar and think the fans far too often sound like idiots, but that doesn't stop people from enjoying it. No one needs my permission. Doesn't me I won't judge you though. (Why you give a fuck about my opinion though is beyond me…)

They probably give a fuck because you sound like an asshole, and people tend to have strong reactions to assholes. But I'm sure you don't give a fuck about that either, because your life has just been soooooo harrrd waaaaah.

That's a really shitty attitude, and I'll tell you why: people who complain about microagressions aren't complaining about them because they happen infrequently, they're complaining about them because they tend to be a source of low level stress that is usually constant in an environment.

The thing about constant stress is that when you're on the receiving end it's a positive feedback mechanism. Cortisol release begets more cortisol release which has all sorts of physiological and genetic effects that are extremely detrimental to immune function, reproductive function, mental health, and can even contribute to impaired health of your potential offspring if those effects aren't ameliorated.

tl;dr stress, even low level stress, is POISON when you have to endure it all the time. They are right to complain. You are just wrong.

I know what it's like to experience micro aggressions. Hell, I got made fun of as a dirty Arab with mustache a ton as a kid (I'm a girl) all the time. Going to a restaurant often meant the waiters thought we were tourists because my parents have accents.

But you know what? It's still not that big of a deal. And a lot of that stress IS due to the result of people putting too much stock in these annoying but ultimately useless gestures.

At the end of the day, though, it can't at all compare to having to spend years separated from your family or be threatened with violence. Like at all. And when people go on and on about all the racism and oppression they've faced and the worst they've experienced is someone wanting to touch their hair or saying "ching chong ding dong" or whatever racist shit it is, I just can't take it seriously. No, it's not fun. But it gets blown HUGELY out of proportion.

Sure, call them out. But when you act like life is SO HARD because of petty bullshit like that, I just do not give a fuck.

Okay, just because some people misuse a term on the internet for pity points does not mean that there's not a real, serious issue attached. You should be well aware of that if you're claiming to have experienced it.

Not everyone is well equipped to deal with stress or has the luxury of avoiding it. Especially if it's something that's happening in the home environment as well as other places.

And being threatened with violence once is actually exquisitely comparable to a constant low level of stress for a long period of time. You can observe just about the same levels of lasting physiological effects from one as you can from the other.

Yeah and guess what?

I still do not give a fuck.

I really, really don't.

I still think they sound like they're complaining thin-skinned whiners.

And you can tell me how it's an important real world issue but you know, even if that's true in all cases (and it's definitely not) that's not going to make me give more of a fuck or stop judging the complainers.

Want to complain? Go right ahead. You don't need my permission or approval. Just don't ask me to care. Because I simply don't.

That's fine, you don't have to. I just hope that when the time comes when you're searching for compassion for your own issues (and you will eventually have to) you remember this.

Oh believe me, I'm well aware that my opinion isn't endearing. But I also think it's incredibly naive to think that people will do anything more than pay lip service to your struggles. You have to figure that shit out on your own.

THANK YOU.

I mean, it may be that tumblr is overusing or misusing the term microaggressions - but it's still a very real thing.

Being stressed out because you're getting shit for being trans or gay or you're the only black kid in you're class and the rest of the kids are picking on you - that has an effect.

If you don't think those things are REAL things that actually happen to people, then I don't really know what to suggest other than maybe walk outside your own sphere of the world for a while.

As I've been known to put it, any one microaggression doesn't sound like a big deal, because it honestly ISN'T a big deal. One locust isn't a big deal either, but it's never just one fucking locust...

I will say that some things labeled as "Microagrresions" can be pretty hurtful or shitty.

But I cannot with people who are so offended by men sitting in a certain way that they feel the need to take creep-shot to whine about on tumbldurr or to walk up and make some comment. I once saw a "movethefuckoverbro" post that whined about "male entitlement" because a guy sat on the FLOOR and nearly headdesked. This trend of acting like how men on the subway sit is OPPRESSION just annoys me and I hope it ends soon.

kinda ot, but taking pictures of people you don't know without permission and posting it on the internet is super creepy and it weirds me out how many people are okay with sharing photos like the subway one.

IA. Like that thing on the news today about that guy taking photos of people reading on the subway. Did he ask the permission of any of those people first?

That, and places like r/creepshots make me kind of paranoid.

IA

Just because you take a picture of someone's crotch to whine about how they're sitting doesn't make it any less a creepshot.

I agree partway on this. Taking pics and posting them is unnecessary and I can def see why it bothers people. But the spread-knees thing also bothers me because it isn't necessary and it involves getting in someone else's space and claiming it as your own (and I'm really uncomfortable with my space being invaded). It also gives me a vibe of being a self-important "alpha male" but that could just be me.

What bothers me about that tumblr is that most of the photos on it are of largely-empty buses and trains. Oh no, someone's taking up two seats when AMPLE SEATING IS AVAILABLE! If they're doing it when the bus is crowded and they're ACTUALLY depriving someone of a seat, that is a totally legitimate complaint. But that ain't what that tumblr is full of.

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[ SECRET POST #2931 ]

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