[ SECRET POST #2944 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2944 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 058 secrets from Secret Submission Post #421.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: I don't know what to do

[(Anonymous)]

Absolutely go see someone about your own stress. Taking care of yourself is important! And I second the anon who said that maybe seeing you go will energize her and/or reduce whatever stigma she may feel about it, so you might actually be helping both of you. But please, take care of you!

Also, probably repeating what others have said, but you are not 100% responsible for her well-being. It's hard to watch someone self-destruct and do nothing, but it is not your fault if she's having trouble. You are allowed to put some distance between yourself and her problems, and honestly, even if you can't shake that sense of responsibility for her, you will not do HER any good by being a strung-out mess, yourself. Get out of the house without her, wear your headphones, whatever you need to do to get some healthy time to yourself, too.

If she seems like the type to be receptive, try talking to her about how her stress is affecting you, too. You can let her know it comes from a place of love and worry, but that you think it's damaging both of you and that you want both of you to be happier. You might also try setting some boundaries with her about when or to what extent you are willing to deal with her stress; depending on your roomie and your relationship, it can be anything from "Tuesday night is wine and whine night! No whining otherwise!" (my former roomie and I did this and it was wonderful for us) to "I'm going to set a timer, you've got five minutes to vent then you have to stop" to more vague but immediate things like, "Not right now" or "I'm sorry to hear that, but I have my own work to do" or even "I will hear you out if this is an emergency, but I will not listen to every minute detail about your classmates or single quiz grades." Setting boundaries is NOT cruelty; it's being humane to yourself.