[ SECRET POST #2958 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2958 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 054 secrets from Secret Submission Post #423.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

05. http://i57.tinypic.com/2r709hk.jpg

[(Anonymous)]

You're better off. Most fandom people are more work in person than you'd think.

[dreemyweird]

?? Isn't this true of most people in general? I don't see how it's unique to fannish communities. In the end, social interaction with anyone isn't particularly easy.

[(Anonymous)]

Dude, that's everyone, not just fandom people.

[solticisekf]

In an experiment where people played ball and excluded somebody from the game, this person felt pain comparable to a physical pain. They measured the brain functions. So being excluded is no laughing matter, it's painful.

Also, hats? Is it a problem?

It could be a case of all the fans nearby being jerks. I don't think you can guess why and how. You can ask, maybe.
Fan gathering is not a peak of social interaction, anyway. Depending on a fandom... But take Star Trek meetings I've been to. I was uncomfortable because people were with kids, they had many inside jokes, too many people for anyone to make an effort to include me and I was feeling antisocial so didn't manage to get into things by myself.
Then I was at a Robin Hood meeting, where we all had a common topic - a fandom fic fest, it was only 8 people and we knew each other from blogs. It wasn't bad.
Or take a one on one online meeting. That could get awkward soon.
In conclusion I'd say meet people you've spoken to online, optimally in a 3-6 people group. Personally I don't like fan gatherings all that much. No enthusiasm.

[(Anonymous)]

Presumably some kind of witch fandom?

(IA with most of your other remarks btw)

[solticisekf]

Agree with all of them, you know you want to. :p

I'm 99% sure you're right. For some reason I thought the tip of a hat was a dark post on the background.

[(Anonymous)]

Hats? The TF2 fandom maybe?

[solticisekf]

Who knows.)

[(Anonymous)]

I'm sorry OP. That sucks.

[(Anonymous)]

Hmmm... could there be other reasons you're not invited, other than offence?

Maybe they think you can't afford it.... Maybe they plain forgot to ask you, and would feel terrible if they realised you *could* come, and they'd forgotten to ask. If you've never been to one before that might be the case.

Just a thought. It's easy to be thoughtless rather than deliberately excluding.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't mean to second guess you, but... are you absolutely positive? You've seen with your own eyes people saying "Let's not invite X, X is such a loser"? Firsthand experience here: feeling rejected and excluded is its own bubble of paranoia, you're not always the best judge of whether or not it's a real thing or your own demons talking. Every tiniest thing becomes incontrovertible proof that you're being judged unworthy or that people are consciously shutting you out. Sometimes... well, to put it nicely, sometimes people aren't actually thinking of you as much as you think they are.

[lb_lee]

If so, it might be for the best. If they're that passive-aggressive, would you really WANT to be around them?

--Rogan

Transcript

[(Anonymous)]

Image: a white woman wearing a black hat with feathers and a flower, that obscures her eyes

Text: I can’t fool myself anymore. I’m being excluded from fandom gatherings

I wish I knew what I’ve done to offend but I won’t ask bcz I don’t want to be excluded online too.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

My text block obscured the hat. It's a witch's hat. HP fandom.

Posting this was a way to let go. I like the people in the group but HP is not my only nor main fandom so I'm better off. Saves me gas $$ - side bennie.

Change is difficult but in this instance, for the best. I'd still attend if invited to a gathering...