Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2015-03-25 06:48 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2015-03-25 06:48 pm
[ SECRET POST #3003 ]
⌈ Secret Post #3003 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 043 secrets from Secret Submission Post #429.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
Re: Family Drama. Help?
(Anonymous) 2015-03-26 02:52 am (UTC)(link)There are some times when you have to suck it up, wade in at your own expense, and try to mop up something you are capable of handling. Other times, you need to flee for your own safety and sanity.
I personally cannot decide for you which you are capable of.
All I can do is give you an example from my own life, and maybe my own actions will give you some ideas. I have a twin. This twin threw over her entire genitive family in order to be with her boyfriend. This family includes parents who love her (who also run a very high maintenance dairy farm), siblings who love her, and unlimited access to home and resources that a small town can provide. But she was just mean and nasty and spiteful and hurtful so she could get her own way.
Her own emotional and personality disorders made her feel justified in acting like a complete douche to all of her family in order to curry favor with her boyfriend. This emotionally and physically devastated our parents, and me. My twin was in no way justified in treating our parents the way she did, and she has apologized for the way she acted, which has led to a lot of friction in my family.
At this time, I was a full time graduate student who lived a few hundred miles away. Hearing about how much havoc she was wreaking for my parents, I came home every few weeks, in spite of having a new life and a lot of work, to help out with their farm, since my sister flat out refused in spite of still living at home.
Stretching myself so thin between my family life and school, and getting emotionally clobbered, several physical conditions (epilepsy created by some other stuff) I'd had worsened to the point where they became dangerous. Still, I come back home every few weeks to help out my parents, and stay as a buffer between my parents and my sister. My sister moved out, but she is still constantly needling at my parents because she is a mean, mean person.
For me personally, I put my physical and mental health at risk to try to stabilize my family. I always will, because that is me. You just have to figure out where your priorities are.