fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3011 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3011 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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(Transformers: War for Cybertron)

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03.

[iZombie]

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04.

[Amazingphil]

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05.

[How to get away with murder/Scandal]

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06.

[Russell Brand]

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07.

[Hand of Fate]

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08.

[Homestuck, The Nostalgia Critic, Channel Awesome]

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(An American Tail)

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[Mark Steel]

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[Once Upon a Time]

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[X-Files, The Lone Gunmen]

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[Divergent series]

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15.

[One Piece]

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16.

[Criminal Minds: Derek Morgan]

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17.

[Bad Suns: Salt music video]

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18.

[Accuracy of Death/Sweet Rain/Shinigami no seido]

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19.

[Steven Universe]

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[One Piece]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 023 secrets from Secret Submission Post #430.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Long time best friends.

Sure I have some long time friends who used to be best friends but they've since moved more into a "casual friends" capacity and I kind of like it that way? New best friends aren't going to joke about "that really embarassing thing in high school we know you hated" or try to tell me how I feel about something based on 15 year old evidence of how I felt when i was /twelve/.

Sure I can see how it might happen sometimes but I don't see it nearly as common or renowned as media stories would have me think.

And I'm glad for it.

I think the concept depends on neither party every changing or growing/evolving in some way. Or that you're both growing and evolving in exactly the same way.

People grow and change over time, especially between e.g. high school and adulthood. It's only natural that their relationships do the same.

I imagine proximity or similar experiences helps a lot. My old best friends really are more casual friends (now) because our experiences have diverged so far and friendship groups have changed.

Can't say I dislike them or anything but the closeness is gone and I'm okay with it. Since it was the highschool friendship where really, you're in a school with a few hundred other students, how long is that going to last outside of that environment when you move to different states and have different interests and meet more people outside of one tiny town?

Idk, I think it's weird.

*thoughts initiated by an old friend calling me their best friend and an "oh dear i only see you as casual friend" thought.

I've had a couple friends I've known for 15 years. We've had our ups and downs but I feel closer to them than ever.

Okay?

Just saying.

Nah I'm glad you're still friends, just don't see it nearly as common as the general gist of things. Or popular. Not sure it falls under renowned category.

Sure I can see how it might happen sometimes but I don't see it nearly as common or renowned as media stories would have me think.

Honestly, I think that's why there's stories about those kinds of friendships (fictional and real). They're actually more rare.

And even a lot of lifelong friendships I know of are between people who only see each other every so often and don't seem to contact one another much in between (but still act/feel as close when they see each other). This isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's just not exactly a "we go to the same cafe we've been going to for thirty years once a month!" thing either.

This.

I don't know, I guess it's because I still hang out with someone that I met before preschool and we hang out on a fairly regular basis and pretty much always have. But I can see where you're coming from.

I honestly don't know what I would do without him or his family in my life, they have become my second family and I really don't see that changing in the future.

I hear that. Our social circle basically entirely changed when we came out--only maybe two or three people survived the transition. And it's not that they're bad people or anything, or that we came out really badly, it's just that life happens like that sometimes. We were (quite literally!) not the person they thought they knew. That's pretty tough!

That said, those old friendships are nice to have, just to remind ourself that we DID have a life before coming out.

--Rogan

It's certainly nice to think about, but except for a SO I don't think I personally 'believe' in it - I'm too cynical and I'm not bothered by friendships changing with life. I used to be, I'd get so hung up on my old friends I'd ignore potential new ones.

But IDK guess I grew apart from that view too when I realise you can make new friends and don't need to deathgrip old ones?

They're still there, nostalgic once a year or so catch ups. But I wouldn't qualify them as 'best' friends anymore, since they don't know the current me so well and I don't know the current them so well?

Yeah, that's fair. I don't even really know that we've had a "best" friend in ages. We just know too many neat people. And yeah, getting hung up on the old instead of embracing the new is bound to cause heartache.

--Rogan

...I've been best friends with my now-SO for ...20 years now?

She has another best friend who she has been friends with 21 years. Maybe it's not common, but it's kind of awesome.

I would really hope you were best friends with you SO O_O

I wasn't best friends with my SO before we started dating? It's not that shocking.

Uh anon, I wouldn't expect you to be BF prior to dating. But if someone is currently your SO I would hope you were also best friends or on the way to it. You're misreading.

[ SECRET POST #3011 ]

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Re: Popular/Renowned Things You're Cynical About

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Re: Popular/Renowned Things You're Cynical About

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