[ SECRET POST #3111 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3111 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Peaky Blinders - not a repeat]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 067 secrets from Secret Submission Post #445.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

Do you owe the person you're breaking up with an explanation?

Do you owe it to him to provide that explanation face to face?

(TBQH, to my ear "You owe the other person an explanation!" gives off a strong vibe of "You owe me a chance to argue or guilt you out of your decision--or at least get in a few zingers.")

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

I think (barring exceptional circumstances) you ought to do it to their face, but I don't think you owe any kind of explanation.

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

no

it'd be polite to, but you also don't owe anyone politeness

ofc you should at least let them know you are breaking up with them and what not to expect from you any more, cutting contact without a word wouldn't be the best idea because then they and anyone they asked about you might be worried that something happened to you and all. but there's a nice neutral between polite and asshole that doesn't require giving specific reasons besides "I don't want to do this any more"

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think you owe people much more than "its not working out" or something along those lines, but explanation or no, I think break ups should be done face to face.

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

I'm probably going to get called radfem for this, but it really does depend on the gender.

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

Why?

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

Honestly curious, what does that mean for same-sex couples in your view?

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

Pfft.

Re: When breaking up

[(Anonymous)]

Um, depending on how long you've been with the person, you might.

Break up after a couple of weeks? Obviously, things aren't working out. No need to tell him you can't the fact he rubs you the wrong way.

Been with the guy for two years? If all you provide is "hey I'm breaking up with you," and don't even have the balls to say it face to face, well, then you probably don't have any respect for that person. Ironically, you'd be doing them a favor by setting them free.

The only exceptions being if this guy is abusive to you, or if you've had plenty of honest discussions about your concerns with the relationship and he's been nothing but dismissive and has shown zero interest in doing his part to keep a healthy relationship going.