fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3124 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3124 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02. [repeat]

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03.

[Sherlock]

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04.

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05.

[Video Girl Ai]

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06.

(Whiplash)

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07.

(Hannibal fan commenting on Neil Gaiman's American Gods series)

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08. http://i.imgur.com/WNtDaEJ.jpg
[Bram Stoker's Dracula, linked for porn / iirc it's rape in the story]

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09. [WARNING for rape]

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10. [WARNING for rape/child abuse]

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11. [WARNING for child abuse]
http://i.imgur.com/f8cCfkZ.png
[For the Love of a Child, linked by OP request]

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12. [WARNING for suicide]

[Welcome To Hell]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #446.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

possible tw for masturbation/sex-related stuff I guess?

...or start wanting to have sex.

I'm asexual, but I do masturbate, and lately it's really bothering me. I feel like if I'm not interested in having sex with anyone, I really shouldn't be masturbating, or if I'm going to masturbate I need to have sex with people. I'm not in a relationship so it's not like I have a partner that wants sex and I'm denying them or something but I still feel really guilty and like I have no "right" to masturbate if I'm not willing to have sex with people.

I know this is probably a weird problem to have, but I don't know how to fix it. How do I stop wanting to masturbate (or start wanting to have sex with people)?

Put some chili oil on your hands, I guarantee that will soon stop you wanting to masturbate.

Yeah, that would do it.

I think instead of stopping masturbating, you should work on getting rid of your shame related to it instead. Its fine to masturbate, whether you're having sex or not. Its hurting literally no one, and as a sexual person, I don't masturbate for the same reasons I have sex. They are separate activities.

Have you looked for any resources for asexual people? They might help.

Why do you think that?>

I think you're looking at this wrong. Instead of trying to stop masturbating or trying to want to sex, start working through that guilt instead.

You totally have the "right" to masturbate. And masturbation and sex are two totally separate things. Yes, they both involve genitals and orgasms, but otherwise, they're not the same at all. Even for sexual people, masturbating and sex are very different experiences, and someone might prefer to masturbate one day but want to have sex the next. It's okay to like or want one but not the other.

Also, a lot of asexual people masturbate. You're completely normal.

I know it's easier said than done, but try to uncouple all of these things. There's no reason for you to feel guilty. There's nothing wrong with you or with what you're doing.

IA with this, and well said. I don't really have anything to add to it, but if OP wants to masturbate I see nothing wrong with it.

A+

You can't control desire or lack of, but you can control the values you ascribe to them.

Nonny, diddle yourself all you want, and do it without guilt. It's your life, and your right, and you don't owe non-existent partners anything. Shit, you can't deny something to someone who's never asked for it, or if it was never offered to them in the first place.

Now, if it's cutting into your work or social life to the point where you're bailing on people in order to fuck yourself, then yeah, I'd say it's a problem. Otherwise... enjoy yourself. And be careful not to chafe.

I'll just chime in with the "decouple sex and masturbation" crowd.

I've never had sex. I've masturbated ever since I can remember. And I'm not asexual. I've just never had the opportunity to have sex with another person (despite being bisexual and polyamorous attraction-wise).

Do I want to have sex? Someday. Do I have to have sex? No. But masturbation is a great way to relax, deal with stress, etc. So get it on with yourself as much as you want, OP. You don't need to feel attraction or a pull to have sex to enjoy the physical sensations that come with masturbation. :)

My problem is that I will have the urge to masturbate at the most inappropriate times. I'll get really, really horny and turned on when I'm supposed to be focusing on something else.

Worse is when it's really really warm. When it's that warm I get sleepy, and when I'm sleepy and warm and content I get aroused.

This is fine except when it's in a classroom setting. I don't remember half my lessons some days...

Man, I get horny as hell when I am stressed out, like when I am trying to focus on something I don't really understand. Basically I'm saying studying for the university classes I have trouble in is a hellish mix of frustration and horniness.

I get this sometimes too. Sometimes I'll wake up with a start in the middle of the night and want to be screwed and fondled like crazy.

this kinda sounds like you need to masturbate more to me?

if you masturbate once in the morning and once at night like clockwork, it might alleviate the sexual tension that's causing you to feel this way? the only times I find myself getting turned on during inappropriate times is when I haven't had a wank in a while.

That was puberty for me. YEARS of that. Sometimes being a guy sucks.

[ SECRET POST #3124 ]

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