[ SECRET POST #3132 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3132 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 068 secrets from Secret Submission Post #448.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I'm in a fandom right now where the fanon/headcanon has taken over and people have gotten very aggressive/defensive about policing opinions. If you don't ship the main ship, for example, you can get people harassing you about it. You also can't express your confusion over why other fans think something is canon when it's clearly not. If you do that you'll probably get harassed for being a jerk. If you're struggling with this kind of fannish environment, then I can absolutely understand where you're coming from. I'm very often in the "silently frustrated" camp just like you.

On the other hand, if you go around trying to convince people that they're doing fannishness wrong, then it's understandable that people are going to be annoyed by you. In fact, I would say that the central tenet of fandom is that we're all free to have and cherish our own versions of the text, no matter how alike or different from canon those versions are. So while I understand your frustration, I also disagree with your mindset that some people aren't "real fans."

Fandom is about allowing endless worlds to sprout from the core text, endless iterations that collect into one big multifaceted entity. So a fan who insists their inaccurate, wishful-thinking interpretation of the text is the right one is kinda "doing it wrong," but so is a fan who insists that canon is the be all and end all which must be followed.


Also, the way you expressed yourself in this secret did make me wonder if you could perhaps have Asperger's, OP. Not that one comment is much to go on, and obviously if you're pretty sure/very sure that you're not an Aspie then never mind. But if you've never considered the possibility before, you might want to do a little internet research and see if you find any info that rings any bells for you.

[(Anonymous)]

What makes you think Aspergers?

[(Anonymous)]

What makes you think Aspergers?

Mostly that I have a fandom friend who was diagnosed with Asperger's a couple of years back, in her late twenties, and something about OP's communication style reminds me strongly of her. Plus, she has always been kind of on the outside of our shared fandom, specifically because she is moved by different aspect of the story. (this is not a very solid reason, I acknowledge that.)

More specifically, it's the way that OP emphasizes her(?) struggle to communicate, and that she just doesn't get why people react to her the way they do. She doesn't try to explain what's going on within the other people in order to strengthen her point and vent about them (E.g. "They're all so desperate to believe their version" or "They don't listen to what I'm actually saying because they're too mad that I don't agree with them.") We as readers can easily imply those things, because we know how fandom works, but OP sticks to more objective, less emotional statements: [paraphrasing] "they don't understand what I understand," and "my opinion is not the popular one and people say I'm a troll."

It's really more of a "vibe" than anything, and OP, the LAST thing I want is for you to feel self-conscious or like I'm accusing you of something or implying there's something wrong with you. I just feel that - just in case - it's probably beneficial to someone with Asperger's if they know they're Aspie earlier, so they can better understand things they may struggle with, and also understand why there are things that they don't struggle with but that other neurotypical people seem to struggle with.

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt

More specifically, it's the way that OP emphasizes her(?) struggle to communicate, and that she just doesn't get why people react to her the way they do.

My fandom experienced a major changeover of fans a while back, and the new ones were hella cliquish. From some of the comments I read at the time, it sounds like a lot of them became friendly via IM, which seems to have cemented who is perceived as 'in' and who isn't.

Not saying this is the problem in OP's case, but sometimes it doesn't matter how friendly you are, what matters is if you're in the clique.