fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3145 ]

[ SECRET POST #3145 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3145 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

[Girl With all the Gifts/She Who Brings Gifts]

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02.

[Hannibal]

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03.

[Rookie Blue]

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04.

[Gakuen Alice]

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05.

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06.

[Linkara, Atop the Fourth Wall]

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07.

[Rookie Blue]

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08.

[Dawes, "Things Happen"]

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09.

[Yukigumi, Sagiri Seina & Sakihi Miyu]

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10.

[Brooklyn Nine-Nine]

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11.

[Good Omens]

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12.

[Arrested Development]

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13. http://i.imgur.com/FckwG6x.jpg
[The Walking Dead (possibly spoilers), linked for gore (not real, but TV/Walking Dead-realism)]

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14. [SPOILERS for M:I - Rogue Nation]

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15. [SPOILERS for Warbreaker]

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16. [WARNING for "NSFW, Nudity, forced kink, general fuckeduppery"]
http://s9.postimg.org/bzl9zbv3j/fs_pparc_twnsfw_twnudity_twgeneralfuckeduppery.jpg
[Hunter x Hunter; linked because ? nudity/abuse/or something? and I'm not really sure what's going on here]

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17. [WARNING for rape]

[The Phantom Of The Opera, James Barbour]

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18. [WARNING for rape]

[Lupin III - The Woman Called Fujiko Mine]

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19. [WARNING for death]

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20. [SPOILERS for the Talos Principle]
[WARNING for suicide]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #449.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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If your romantic partner wanted to wait until marriage, would you still date him/her? Have you been in that situation before?

(Let's assume they don't care whether you've had sex in the past, and that they aren't asexual.)

No, because I don't want to get married, so I'd never get laid.

Also if i were the marring type: stiill no, because you don't want to find out you're sexually incompatible AFTER you are married.

Sure.

Depends on the situation, really. If it wasn't a very serious relationship and I felt unsatisfied without sex, probably not.

If it was serious but I'm not sure I want to marry him and the lack of sex is a stumbling block in further developing our relationship to see if I do want to marry him, that would be a problem but, it depends.

If I'm already so in love with him (for example, if he was a friend I already knew very well who I fell in love with later) that I'm positive I want to marry him at some point, then I'd be fine with waiting.

No.

No. Sex is pretty important to me. I respect that as there personal choice, but I don't think I could deal with it unless we were going to get married right away, and I can't imagine ever wanting to just go ahead and marry someone I only just started to date.

I'm not sure. Wanting to wait can also be a sign of social beliefs that are very different from my own . Besides, you want to know you're sexually compatible before then.

I'd settle on waiting a while, though.

Sex is really not an important part of a relationship for me so that wouldn't bother me at all.

No, but because I'm asexual myself. Waiting until marriage sounds like they're expecting sex once the knot is tied.

I've been in this situation before. We later broke up due to other reasons. It was not a hindrance. I just had to get creative with our kinks.

Edited 2015-08-15 00:10 (UTC)

I wouldn't care. Would probably be a bit relieved, tbh.

It would depend on the situation, obviously. But in general terms, I'm kind of in two minds about it.

On the one hand, I think that sex is a pretty important element of relationships, and a lot of people who I know and whose opinions I trust seem to think that waiting until marriage is a bad idea, so I think it's probably a bad idea.

On the other hand, there's definitely a part of me that says that, hell, you've made it this long without sex. How much worse can it be? What's the worst that could happen? I mean, it's not like I'm going to get more unhappy about the lack of sex than I already am somehow. And if the tradeoff is being with someone you really like, emotionally and everything, that seems like maybe it's worth it.

I don't know.

Re: Until the wedding night!

elaminator - 2015-08-15 01:06 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Until the wedding night!

sarillia - 2015-08-15 01:44 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Until the wedding night!

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-15 02:35 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Until the wedding night!

sarillia - 2015-08-15 02:38 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Until the wedding night!

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-15 03:06 (UTC) - Expand

No, because good lord, could you imagine finding out you're sexually incompatible after you get married? Nope nope nope.

I would be the romantic partner wanting to wait until marriage.

But that doesn't mean you can't talk things over beforehand to make sure that expectations and interests are compatible.

No, because a) sex in a relationship is important to me and b) I believe that sexual compatibility is a very important part of a lasting relationship. I wouldn't want to marry someone until I was absolutely sure that we were compatible on a sexual level as well as on an emotional one.

Nah, probably. I think it's because I've been in lots of relationships where it's normal to have sex, so it would be weird to not have it.

My first serious adult relationship, with a guy who had been my best friend before we started dating, fell apart because of sexual incompatibility. No way am I signing a legally- and socially-binding marriage certificate without making sure that part of the relationship is solid. I get the historical reasons for waiting, but I think it's odd to think it's important to work through all other points of compatibility but assume it's fine to leave sex (and how you get along living under one roof) up to chance, as if those things weren't important.

No. I think that's a really odd attitude about life, and also I'm a very sexual person. So that wouldn't work out.

I would still date them as long as they don't mind me fulfilling myself in the meantime (I'm a woman, if it matters).

Though I am a little bitter about it. The last relationship I had where my boyfriend was "waiting for marriage", I respected that. We broke up after three years together. Six months after the breakup, he starts dating a new girl.. and loses his virginity a few months later. (We had mutual friends)

So, yeah...

Absolutely. I respect a person's right to his or her own body.

I would only have problems if they insisted we remain sexually monogamous, because that's not really how I like to roll, and I would hope someone who wanted to marry me wouldn't secretly be agonizing over that.

This will probably sound weird, but...

Possibly no. Sex isn't a big deal to me since I have a low sex drive. But, I do think sexual compatibility can be a big deal in a relationship and I don't want to find out that I'm sexually incompatible with someone after a legally and socially binding contract. It takes me a lot to muster up the drive for sex to begin with so that alone makes sex...kind of a chore for me. Then, to find out that my partner and I wouldn't be able to satisfy each other makes things even worse.

Hopefully that makes some lick of sense. I know it's weird thinking, but yeah. I would just really like to know where my partner and I would stand when it concerns sex.

I could wait until engagement - if it turns out unexpectedly that we're really, totally sexually incompatible, we could call it off. But I don't think I'd want to wait until marriage. The "not having sex" part is okay with me, but not pushing aside the danger that we might not work out in bed.

No. Sex is an important part of a romantic relationship for me. It isn't for some people, and I respect that, but whatever their reasons, I'm not going to get romantically involved with them.

Well, ignoring the fact that I CAN'T MARRY who I love, and that working out sexual compatibility is important, good god that is a foreign concept to me. Like, WHYYYYYYYYY????????

the lack of sex wouldn't bother me but I'd be suspicious as hell of their reasons for doing so, because I' not interested at ALL in dating someone who is either religious, conservative, or has inernalized homophobia

Re: Until the wedding night!

elialshadowpine - 2015-08-15 21:06 (UTC) - Expand

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