fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3157 ]

[ SECRET POST #3157 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3157 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 018 secrets from Secret Submission Post #451.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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How do I not feel like a douchebag for writing a lesbian having a brief romance with a straight guy? I acknowledge she's still gay, and it's not a "cured by the penis" thing, but I still feel like an asshole.

isn't that bisexuality?

OP

Not really, because she's canon identified as a lesbian. I'd have no problem with this if she were bi.

Why? Sometimes things are fluid. I certainly know "straight" girls who have had flings with other women.

I guess... It's just that she's never shown any canon interest in men, to my knowledge, and although I think it works in the story (like, it's a specific canon guy, their personalities match up, it's not just an excuse for porn), I have this nagging feeling about it.

You feel like an asshole because you've let the SJW crowd into your head. Kick them out.

I don't know how. :(

(no subject)

dancing_clown - 2015-08-27 00:02 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-27 00:13 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

dancing_clown - 2015-08-27 00:16 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-27 00:19 (UTC) - Expand

Why do you feel like an asshole? Just make it clear it isn't a "cured by the penis" thing and explore where her feelings for the guy come from to make it clear she's a lesbian.

Human relationships and sexuality are complex. This is a big part of the LGBT movement -- it's not "sexuality should be just as rigid and black-and-white as it used to be, only now with gays allowed too."

I keep forgetting to write OP...

As for the why, I think dancing_clown is probably right. Makes sense. I don't know why I feel this amount of guilt over fanfic. I'm bi, myself, and initially I had no problem with developing this idea and plotting it out and all, always with the knowledge that she was still a lesbian no matter what, but then all of a sudden I got worried about the implications of what I was writing, and ... blah.

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-27 01:38 (UTC) - Expand

Because your a ciscum het asshole erasing her queerness. DIAF ciscum.

I get that this is a joke, and it is an a+ parody of these assholes, but this makes me wonder: how come no-one ever reports DIAF as suicide encouragement, or whatever it is when people wish death on other people and case removes it?

hi noodles

Well why is she sleeping with the guy? Does it further her story or his? Experimenting? Forced into it? Sleeping with a dick is not going to magically make her straight or bi if she's firmly lesbian. Dicks aren't that amazing.

<- experimented with one dick owning person in uni. It was just awkward and not arousing at all. Still a lesbian. Neither of us could make eye contact afterwards. Just, mutual uncomfortable awkwardness. We gave up halfway in a "yeaaaah no" kind of way. It's funny in retrospect.

Yeah, lesbian here, threesome with a woman, her cis male friend came along, I went eh fuck it let's try it out, I was on ecstasy and still was totally bored and unaroused by it.

(no subject)

caerbannog - 2015-08-27 00:30 (UTC) - Expand

OP

They're friends, they're horny, the usual partners are unavailable, and they thought why not? Definitely not forced. It's absolutely her decision, and he's happy to go along with it (once he's sure she is). They both get growth from it, but it's definitely not screwing the gay away.

(no subject)

caerbannog - 2015-08-27 00:39 (UTC) - Expand

Because there's a lot of that shit around that doesn't really respect lesbians. Like remember the film Chasing Amy. If you try really hard to show that's not the case with your work, it's okay, but expect it to play into many people's discomfort/assumptions about lesbians just needing a deep dicking anyway.

Man somebody should slap Kevin Smith everyday, just for having made Chasing Amy

I remember the film Chasing Amy and Alyssa was the protagonist with an asshole boyfriend.

Edit: Alyssa. Of course Amy was also the protagonist with an asshole boyfriend.

Edited 2015-08-27 00:43 (UTC)

Don't get your feedback from tumblr. Talk to friends who happen to be lesbian, see what they think about it.

And if you still feel strongly about it, maybe it's a story best shelved.

I've never written that, but in a previous fandom I shipped the fuck out of a lesbian and a straight guy. I felt guilty about it, but the characters had way more chemistry with each other than any of their respective love interests. The showrunner made a few comments implying she was going to turn out to actually be bi, people got pissed about it, they killed her off and the show (which had already gone downhill from the previous season) staring sucking even more and I quit watching.

Anyway, I totally get feeling like a douchebag, but I think as long as it's not a "his magic dick turned her straight" thing it's okay.

SA

Er, that should be "STARTED sucking even more" not staring.

Embrace the reality that sexuality is fluid and people experiment, even gay people. Treat it practically and realistically. Have the character question herself or wonder what this means for her identity, rather than handwave that part of it away.

Nah, depending on how you wrote it, it could be interesting. :shrug:

Don't feel bad, especially since you are taking pains to not make it "cured by the penis".

I wish there was more allowance for this, fic that explores such relationships without trying permanently change the characters. I know there is a history is some regions of people trying to "cure" gay folk, and I think fics like this should exist to counter that.

Why is it necessary for her to have a romance with a straight guy? What value does it add to the story? Why do you want to write it?

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