fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3188 ]

[ SECRET POST #3188 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3188 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 054 secrets from Secret Submission Post #456.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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What's the worst you've done?

I never do anything, but I like to find tumblr people's secret personal alt accounts for fun. I also go through a couple people's tumblr likes.

I've also found a couple of f!s people's tumblrs who've never linked it here.

I'm always so curious about how you go about finding things and connecting accounts because I am completely at a loss. So bad at sleuthing.

It's easy when they're into rare fandoms
DA

you're disgusting

a bit harsh. creepy maybe?

Looked up a city firefighter I saw at a carnival. Went thru the list of city firefighters and looked them all up on FB. But I can only view his profile pic. But damn was he hot as fuck. Like a RL superhero.

I one time watched a porno. It sure was some people having sex (maybe).

When I was in college in the mid-1990s, I was obsessed with this one band. This band had released a single that was long out of print and working with record stores to locate it was fruitless (and the internet was new and Napster hadn't been invented yet). So I thought, "I know! The band lives in New York City! I'll go to the library and find the NYC phone book, look up the band members, and see if I can find their addresses!"

So I did this, and found the address of the bass player. I mailed him a blank cassette tape and a letter saying something like, "Hey, I'm a big fan of your band, can't find [that one single] anywhere....if you have any copies of it lying around, would you be willing to copy it onto this tape and send it back to me???" And I used my college address on the return label.

He never replied (of course). At the time, I had no idea how creepy this was, either, internet etiquette being a new thing to me.

A few years later, I found an interview with the drummer of this band which mentioned his AIM screenname. I messaged him for a while and he was cool until he told me what college he'd gone to, and it was a college that my college was in a community with (i.e., students from either college could take classes at the other college as though it were part of the same institution). Right after I told him that I had gone to [my college], he stopped messaging me. I realized he might have recognized me as the weirdo from [my college] who had sent his friend a blank tape to his personal address, like a crazy stalker, and I was mortified. That was in the year 2000, and it was the last time I ever communicated with anyone in this band.

These days, that drummer is still making music and is also a really good photographer and gives interviews about his photography in art journals....and I just read an interview with him that gives his Twitter account. I would love to follow him on Twitter, but I'm afraid he'll remember me from all those years ago, and get freaked out.

SA

Can't edit -- on second thought, I don't remember how I got the guy's AIM name, but it wasn't from an interview. I was confusing that with the Twitter thing.

Not that this matters but whatever.

A reviewer gave me their PO box to send a free copy of my book. I ran the PO box through Google and got their real name off their amateur radio license, then ran their real name through Google and got their home address. They're pretty close to me, so I offered to drop it off on their doorstep. They preferred I use the PO box. (if it counts for anything, I also gave them the link to delete their personal information.)

Okay, that would freak me the fuck out if it happened to me. If I've made a conspicuous effort to maintain a certain level of anonymity: PO Box, pen name, etc. then that's a huge indicator that I DON'T want people digging to find my real identity, even if it's not a difficult search.

Re: Your creepy behavior

feotakahari - 2015-09-26 22:15 (UTC) - Expand

Saved the street addresses/Google streetviews of celebrity crushes' homes. I don't live nearby and probably couldn't even get that close, but I have them.

I very nearly committed street harassment the other day.

So I was driving home from work, and I saw a lady in a skirt showing rather a lot of leg. And these legs, man, these legs. I'm not a leg man, but these legs were simply beautiful.

And the impulse to wind down the window and let her know just how beautify I found her legs was overwhelming, which would have been monsterous, I know this I'd never do it, because it would have been a horrible experience for her, but I swear it wasn't a drive to belittle or devalue the women, I was thinking "I need to exert my power over her, I need to maake her feel small and weak and afraid" which is what I always assumed street harassers were about, but here the compulsion felt like when you're at a comic conventions and you see a stunning costume and you just want to gush about how great the costume is. Same feeling of "I need to let this person know how beautiful I find this".

Before you tall me, I already know I should feel ashamed of it, and I truly do. I'm just surprised with myself.

It's okay, anon. That's what beauty does to people, sometimes. But unlike a lot of people, you realized that it wouldn't have been taken the way you intended and that it might be a rather scary experience for her, so you refrained. More people would benefit from that level of self-awareness.

Anon, it's okay to be stunned by the beauty you see in another person. And the fact that you refrained from calling at her because you know how it might be taken by the girl having a random stranger catcall them means you're self-aware, not creepy. Don't be hard on yourself over this.

I don't think you should be too hard on yourself. I think everyone has thoughts like these whether they involve sexual harassment or regular harassment. There are sometimes where I get so annoyed with someone that I feel the sudden and fleeting urge to shout at them and point out every single negative flaw they have because I want to knock the down a peg but I don't do it because I'm not an total asshole. Sometimes you can't help thinking things like that but the difference between being a decent person and being an asshole is the fact that you don't actually say them.

It is good that you didn't go through with it, but please don't let these comments convince you that this impulse of yours is ok, because it's not ok that you wanted to do this. This shows a very troubling side of you that does regard women as objects, and it's something you really need to work on. It's good that you recognise this, but you need to be better.

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:16 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:20 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:22 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:28 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:23 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:20 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:34 (UTC) - Expand

Thoughts like that happen, the important part is you didn't share them out loud through the window while doing a driveby (as that can quite often be alarming).

God knows I've seen so many people and I just want to let you know your coat looks adorable or your hair is amazing or hello you look awesome today but you're a random stranger so probably better not.

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:50 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-26 22:54 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Your creepy behavior

caerbannog - 2015-09-26 22:58 (UTC) - Expand

There was this minor internet celebrity a few years ago who unwisely opened his Facebook to fans. I was backreading his wall one day, partly out of boredom and partly because I totally had a crush on him shut up. Anyway, somewhere in 2008 (it was 2011 at the time) I found his cell phone number. So I messaged him to let him know to delete that post. Which is less creepy than calling him, but still, y'know, revealing that I was reading years of Facebook posts for a guy I barely knew. And then I decided it would be the right thing to do to scour the rest of his history, from the time he joined FB, to see if it was in any other posts, and then let him know to delete those too so no real creepers would get hold of it (read with sarcasm, though there were some people in his fandom who would have snapped up the chance). I found seven others. He never replied, but did delete the posts.

Also, probably because I felt like such a creeper about it, the number stuck in my mind. I still remember it, years later, without ever seeing it again. There are people I've called a hundred times and still have to look up the number every time, yet I can't seem to scrub my memory of that one. *sigh*

On a less lighthearted note, there's someone who deeply hurt a friend of mine. One night (also roughly 2011), I managed to find the place where she works, just with her first name, former married name, state of residence, and Google. Then I panicked and calling my therapist for reassurance that I wasn't a fucking psycho just for thinking about hunting this person down and giving her what for (I didn't have anywhere near the means or the guts to actually do it, and if I had, it would at least have been less "kill" and more "yell at"), and I know thinking isn't doing or even planning, but it happened. Sometimes I remember it and feel all...icky.

Manspreading in retaliation to someone who probably wasn't manspreading on purpose (or in hindsight)? Like, I made sure our thighs were snug even when he pulled back bit by bit. And every time he'd look over at me with this wary "what are you song face" I'd just side eye and glare. He couldn't have gotten off at his stop more awkwardly if he tried.

Thinking about it now, I was the perp jerk :(

I once checked a hot guy's Facebook (I knew him from Uni, so he wasn't a complete stranger). Good thing all his settings were set for private so I couldn't get too far.

If that's considered creepy behavior then probably 80% of people are creeps. Even good people get allured by facebook stalking

Re: Your creepy behavior

(Anonymous) - 2015-09-27 06:57 (UTC) - Expand

Masturbated in the bathroom of the house of a guy I had a crush on when I was a teenager, because he wasn't into me but he was letting me share his bed (for sleeping only) good god mixed signals man wtf.

Fannish-wise, I've never done anything creepy. In RL, there's this amazing guy I've been attracted to for a very long time. We see each other on occasion but it's not enough for me so I downloaded an app on my phone I know he uses in lieu of FB, and since his # is in my phone, he shows up as a 'friend' - and the app displays when he's online and when he was last online. I use it to track his whereabouts. If he's on it a lot, I know he's busy that day. When his "last online" time is more than six or so hours before, I know he's staying in that day. It's so not healthy of me, and he'd probably be creeped out if he knew, but it is what it is.

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