fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3218 ]

[ SECRET POST #3218 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3218 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 053 secrets from Secret Submission Post #460.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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I know Ian Q and Alex Hirsch talked about it on their twitters. Ian said people can draw whatever fanart they like, and if you don't like it just block them, and report the art if they think it's need. Alex said artists shouldn't tell other artists what to draw, and basically said they were in the wrong for it.

I see the ones who happily drive the girl to suicide are now upset that the creators don't approve of their cyber bullying.

Eugghhh. I'm just going through some tags now, and thankfully there's a LOT of people in the fandom absolutely disgusted that this came to pass. So glad the creators said something positive in support.

Then this turd amongst the gems, posted post-suicide attempt, WT actual F?? @zamii070 jjust wondering are u ever gonna applogize without being transphobic, racist, fatphobic, or a shitty person? like an actual apology for what uve done and bot a piss poor “pity meeeeeeeeee”video? just wondering lol

Wow. "Apologize to meeee, your fanart isn't about myyyy liking, mee mee meeeeeeee!" is all I see when I read vile shit like this.

Here's another one:
Why can't I just. Be able to enjoy things? I really just want to be able to watch SU and GF without feeling hurt and anxiety in my stomach because the creators say and do things which are hurtful to me. But apparently I fucking can't. I can't enjoy anything. I'm just not allowed. I'm shaking. I feel like crying. I hate this.

Is that narcissism or borderline talking? Because that sure as fuck is a personality disorder manifested RIGHT THERE.

ETA: Person who wrote that is reporting getting a lot of flak from it, people telling her she's a baby, etc. So she's now saying they're driving her to suicide and she's about to kill herself. In between reblogging stuff about Harry Potter etc.

Aaaaand with that, I'm out. Good night.

Edited 2015-10-27 11:40 (UTC)

I suspect it's a kind of self-suggestion feedback spiral?

Tumblr culture (Not All Tumblrs yadda yadda yeah I know, but y'all know exactly what I mean) encourages embracing as many underprivileged identities as you can. Now, neurodivergence and mental illnesses are genuinely a lot more common than the mainstream thinks (heck, I'm both neurodivergent and mentally ill). And they can theoretically affect anyone, and can be difficult to prove or disprove. So a lot of people will embrace those, real or imagined.

But to have Tumblr Cred with your mental illness/neurodivergence, you gotta be sure to have symptoms. And the Tumblr culture is big on validating those symptoms - not working with them or around them, or alleviating the harmful ones. Just validating them.

From personal experience, I know that you kinda have to validate your symptoms in order to do anything about them. You have to acknowledge that a symptom that makes your life difficult, is something that exists.
I've had many enlightening "oh wow apparently I experience this completely differently from the grand majority of people, that explains SO MUCH" moments. And then you work with that realization, and it'll make you more self-aware, and if the "symptom" is something that's making something difficult for you to do, and it's something you WANT (or absolutely need) to do, you can figure out how to do it, and/or get the required help.

Like for example, I like to go to a bar sometimes, but the noise level might eventually give me a sensory overload. Knowing that most people don't get that the way I do, is useful because that means I can't just base my own expectations on "oh well everyone else is doing fine so I should logically be fine too". Instead, I'll use earplugs if it's really noisy and I don't have to talk to anyone at the moment. I'll take some breaks once in a while, away from the cacophony. And I'll leave home BEFORE it starts getting bad, and will end the night having actually enjoyed it.

BUT a lot of the culture on Tumblr stops at validating your symptoms. There is a lot of peer pressure to prove that you're "not neurotypical", so people embrace their symptoms, and dramatic displays of things going wrong are a good way to prove your suffering. There is this trend of "we wouldn't have to adapt to the world of neurotypicals/able-bodied people etc., we should be allowed to be ourselves". And in theory, this should be like... public spaces taking into account that some people are neurodivergent or disabled or whatever. Wheelchair ramps and elevators. Teachers understanding that it's impossible for the autistic or ADHD kid to follow the teaching if there's randomly music playing in the classroom, or other cacophony. Available mental health services.

BUT instead, Tumblr culture and peer pressure drives people to embrace their symptoms. It seems to be like... "Could I have a bad symptom because of this? I probably could, or at least someone else could. I'll make sure to do that then."

Self-suggestion is a surprisingly powerful thing. For example, if you happen to feel sorta iffy about seeing bare feet, but then you start convincing yourself that images of bare feet could give you genuine panic attacks, and you have an echo chamber of people validating that yes, it's possible to have panic attacks because of feet, and there's even some peer pressure to do it so you'll belong into the group... you can probably manipulate yourself into having a panic attack because of feet. And after that, the downward spiral can feed on itself. That way, people can eventually condition themselves into having worse and worse reactions to increasingly insignificant issues, instead of learning to avoid or alleviate the initial ones.

And I'm not saying recovery is easy, or that the initial validation is unimportant. For example, I still end up in sensory overload situations sometimes, and the actual neurodevergence that's causing it ain't going anywhere, ever. But I don't think stopping to specifically wallow in your harmful symptoms after you've recognised and validated their existence is a very good long-term solution.

Good post.

But I don't think stopping to specifically wallow in your harmful symptoms after you've recognised and validated their existence is a very good long-term solution.

YES. Well said.

From personal experience with this, and with living with/putting up with others also with illnesses/disabilities, I had to learn not to wallow in my suffering and symptoms. "Listen to me, validate me" can become not only a self-pity spiral almost revelling in each symptom, but an excuse to become a selfish, even abusive, git. Especially fun when it becomes a competition with others as to who has the most tough.

Taking some ｒｅｓｐｏｎｓｉｂｉｌｉｔｙ for yourself and your effect on others (where you CAN) is my byword.

The reason I'm fascinated by but also not going anywhere near most of sj-ish parts of tumblr is that over-familiarity - it's not unique to tumblr by any means.

Fantastic post. Very well put/explained.

Wait, wait, let me see if I've got this clear: She's shaking and crying and mourning that she's "not allowed to enjoy anything" and claiming she doesn't feel safe because the creators have condemned the bullying?

Please tell me I read it wrong.

I'm sorry. This isn't an isolated incident.

I think that since the show is in support of social justice (and humanism and acceptance), and this certain type of SJWs are in support of social justice, and mob mentality and the idea that they're the champions of absolute moral purity, and must destroy anyone who doesn't fit into their increasingly strict and idealised standards for it, that should mean that the show is in support of that, too.

And once the creators revealed that they don't actually support that (which people really should have been able to figure out from watching the show. The impossibility of perfection, importance of trying to understand those opposing you, and forgiveness of people's flaws are kinda huge central themes...), these certain types of people feel like a pedestal they were heavily relying on has been broken.

From what I've seen, it looks like these types of people, or at least some of them, have tried to adapt by deciding that actually it's just Rebecca Sugar, the show creator, who is on a pedestal of moral purity, and other people working on the show (especially the male ones) are tainted, but Rebecca is keeping them on her moral leash, or something. Certain fans have proposed that the moral purity of the show could be preserved by disallowing any men from working on it - I rather hope this one was a troll blog, but I'm not sure.

Some vocal members of the fanbase baited some of the crew members into entering rather unreasonable discussions about the subject, and then got angry when their responses to that weren't found sufficiently reasonable.
On a side note, I've noticed a new derailing trend rising, related to the classic Hitler comparison: The child porn comparison. When you don't want to actually come up with a reasonable comeback to the person you're debating, accuse them of supporting CP. It doesn't have to have anything to do with the subject of the discussion so far. Just pull some mental gymnastics to accuse your opponent's argumentation of supporting CP, because they hadn't specifically been opposing it (since it's generally assumed, and wasn't relevant to the discourse). Your opponent will then be too distraught, and too busy trying to explain that they don't support CP, to get across their actual point.

Then you can always later bring up That Time When the person may have supported child porn, to make them seem bad again.

Now that Matt Burnett (one of the show creators) has closed his twitter, apologised for not instantly handling the unreasonable situation well enough, and generally blamed and doubted himself because of the shitstorm, a certain segment of the fanbase is like "Rebecca must have yelled at him!" "I just hope he'll eventually apologise PROPERLY!" "Look at this dude having a self-pity party!" "The creators should learn to understand that just making a show like SU alone ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH, and they don't deserve praise for that alone!"

I'm a bit uncertain about these fans' perception of Rebecca Sugar. I mean, not just the "remaining paragon of absolute moral purity" part, but also the "must have yelled at him" part they have constructed as a "happy ending". This is the lady who, in a recent interview, explained that the reason for her show's characteristic, well, niceness, and the humor in it typically NOT being based on people being mean to each other, was that she's tired of meanness.

I think I'm going to go sit in a corner and read something nice and cheerful, like maybe Europe's Inner Demons or Salem Possessed.

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[ SECRET POST #3218 ]

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