Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2015-10-31 03:24 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2015-10-31 03:24 pm
[ SECRET POST #3223 ]
⌈ Secret Post #3223 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
01.
__________________________________________________
02.
__________________________________________________
03.
__________________________________________________
04.
__________________________________________________
05.
__________________________________________________
06.
__________________________________________________
07.
__________________________________________________
08.
Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 050 secrets from Secret Submission Post #461.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?
At least some of it is that I genuinely find a lot of older people attractive. Most of the recent celebs I've been into have been people that have 10, sometimes 20 years on me. The experience has something to do with it too... I find it appealing, but I guess there's also a level of comfort to it? “They have all this experience, they can give me some pointers, we can take care of each other."
And even know I like a lot of things in fiction that are more taboo than an age difference, I guess it does add a bit of excitement to the pairings. And something else to “overcome", like other anon said.
Idk, I generally like to focus on the porn and not think about the reasons, but I'm sure there are reasons.
Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?
(Anonymous) 2015-11-01 01:41 am (UTC)(link)I know where you're coming from in regards to finding people/celebrities who are older genuinely attractive. I've been like that for a the greater part of my life.
It is rather difficult to put in words, isn't it?
And yes, I too do like to focus on the other aspects, like a smutty oneshot or drawn out lovin', then I really don't care if age is addressed unless the characters use their age differences to turn each other on, i.e. "you dirty old man". But sometimes, if the point of the story is the relationship, but it's is not addressed (or it's dealt with a grain of salt), it does bother me. Let me see how it works! Make it work! Make me believe it!
Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?
Thankfully I feel that most the age difference fic I've read did discuss the issues such a relationship would entail, or at least discuss (sometimes at length) the characters feelings and insecurities in the matter. Which is yet another thing I like about it, I guess; characters feeling self-conscious about an aspect of themselves (age in this case) and being reassured that they're 'fine, as is'.
Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?
(Anonymous) 2015-11-01 02:00 am (UTC)(link)Ditto on all of this :).
I think it's also the maturity thing sometimes, too-like, if you're 18, 19 years old, and you look around at the guys your age who are still acting immature, suddenly a man who's 30 plus years old, who's got his shit together and is more stable and settled and mature is going to look a LOT more appealing to you.
Obviously there are many exceptions and variations to that, of course-there are some 18, 19 year old boys who are WAY more mature than men who are 35, 40 years old. But if one is surrounded by immature young men, I definitely think finding older men who are more mature has a serious appeal.
As for why older people go for younger people? A chance to recapture their youth, I figure. Or if they've always felt "young at heart", they may have an easier time relating to younger (yet still legal age, this must be noted, obviously) people. They may feel people in their age group are too stuffy and focused on their twilight years and resigned to getting old, and they just can't relate to that or are scared to acknowledge it or whatever.
Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?
Now that you mention it I have seen it described in that way and I think it makes sense. (I don't think you need to be surrounded by people you view as immature, though that would certainly 'help' in this case. And say you find said older person attractive and are looking for a 'mature relationship', I suppose one might jump to the conclusion that someone with more experience might be more willing (or able?) to give you that.
God, IDK, this is why I don't examine my kinks.
They may feel people in their age group are too stuffy and focused on their twilight years and resigned to getting old, and they just can't relate to that or are scared to acknowledge it or whatever.
That I can see!
Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?
(Anonymous) 2015-11-01 06:43 am (UTC)(link)You're also right that one doesn't need to be surrounded by immature people to have that attraction, too. Sometimes some people just naturally feel "older than their years" in general, and that alone is enough reason for them to be attracted to older men or women.