case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2015-11-22 03:58 pm

[ SECRET POST #3245 ]


⌈ Secret Post #3245 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 067 secrets from Secret Submission Post #464.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

(Anonymous) 2015-11-22 10:14 pm (UTC)(link)
What do you mean by functionally dysfunctional?
kallanda_lee: (Default)

[personal profile] kallanda_lee 2015-11-22 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
By that I'd say I mean that we like each other, and manage to maintain something that resembles a relationship, while we're probably people who, separately of each other, should probably not be in a relationship. And certainly not a "normal" person, because we'd make them dreadfully miserable and vice versa.

If you get down to the details of it, it's actually harder to explain.

I guess one of the things is that it seems to be fairly casual in terms of what long-term things usually are - we don't really go for a progression, we don't really have common goals, we're not a "unit" financially or otherwise.

We both actually sort of prefer being alone a lot of the time.

We're sort of quirky, difficult, sometimes unpleasant people with pasts that the other doesn't even know the exact details (especially on my end, actually, for all he knows he could be dating an actual sociopath), but it just sort of...works.

I dunno. I'm not sure any of that made an sense.
Edited 2015-11-22 22:28 (UTC)

(Anonymous) 2015-11-22 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)
That doesn't seem dysfunctional, just casual.

I mean, I don't think a relationship has to be the things that society says it's supposed to be for it to be "healthy." I think it just has to involve not being abusive or disrespectful to your partner.
kallanda_lee: (Default)

[personal profile] kallanda_lee 2015-11-22 10:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't think we're abusive. I think both of us actually have great potential to be, though, in different ways. And it's weird, because we're both acutely aware of how much the one could fuck the other one up and vice versa, but as I said, we like each other, so we don't.

(Anonymous) 2015-11-22 10:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Isn't that the main difference between someone who's abusive and someone who's not though? Everybody has the potential to be an abuser, and the people who aren't abusive are people who are aware of that and don't act on the potential.
kallanda_lee: (Default)

[personal profile] kallanda_lee 2015-11-22 10:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Hmm, maybe you're right. I'll ponder on that one.