[ SECRET POST #3246 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3246 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 055 secrets from Secret Submission Post #464.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

because it seems to me someone who has an abortion is rarely depicted as having profoundly painful feelings about it, even though they know it's absolutely the right choice for them.

I don't want to come off as critical, because I think this is very much a "you do you" kind of area, but honestly my experience with how abortion is handled in fiction has been exactly the opposite. Whenever abortion comes up in a story and on the very rare occasions it's actually something the character goes through with, it always seems to be treated like the big, traumatic deal. I always sit there thinking, "Can we please, just fucking ONCE, let an abortion be no big deal? Like, can we just have the character be like, 'Oh fuck, better schedule an appointment,' and then actually go to the appointment and have no internal conflict and be done with it? Cuz that would be great." I just wish fiction would sometimes acknowledge that conflict-free abortion is a reality for some women.

[blitzwing]

I just wish fiction would sometimes acknowledge that conflict-free abortion is a reality for some women.

Sure, sometimes it is. For a lot of people, there are negative associations from it. I did a fair amount of research on how women felt after having one, and at least from what I saw, there's a noticeable if not surprising correlation between the attitudes of one's family/lover about the abortion, and how the women felt about it. The ones that were pressured into it, or guilted over it, had to keep it a secret, or knew those close to them don't approve, were far more likely to regret it or to report traumatized feelings over it.

In other words, if you want a conflict-free abortion for a character, you can't just decide to write one, if you want it to be realistic and IC. You have to consider the relationships and circumstances of the character.

[(Anonymous)]

if you want a conflict-free abortion for a character, you can't just decide to write one, if you want it to be realistic and IC. You have to consider the relationships and circumstances of the character.

Fair enough. I mean, if you want it to be extremely in character. But then I'm in a big enough fandom that characterization is a very malleable, amorphous thing anyway. One of the main characters in my OTP is someone who, as I see it, would never want kids. Yet people feel no reticence about writing him as someone who can't wait, not just to have kids, but to bear them himself (which is yet more OOC). And for that matter, how many female characters in popular media choose to keep their baby, because the writers want a baby story line, when it would probably be more in line with their character for them to have an abortion?

So yeah, the whole "realism and characterization" argument cuts both ways. Myself, I tend to not be overly hung up on it. If the writer can make me want to keep reading, then it's all good. I think that's how most fic readers are.

[(Anonymous)]

Someone I know had one. It was very much "birth controlled failed, well, shit. Now it's a hassle." and her biggest complaint was the waiting room and recovery area had next to zero entertainment available. So her next paycheck she got a stack of magazines and some cheap DVDs and donated them to the clinic so others wouldn't be stuck achy and bored waiting to be able to go home. I thought that was awesome.

[(Anonymous)]

That is awesome. Your friend is awesome. This comment literally made my day, I'm not even kidding. If I knew how to forge metal I would make your friend a trophy for winning at life.

[(Anonymous)]

She seems like a callous person. Could she not even mourn for the life inside her that died for five minutes?

[(Anonymous)]

I assume that if she saw it this way, she wouldn't have an abortion in the first place.

[(Anonymous)]

There's lots of things living inside the human body that we kill as soon as we can without being expected to mourn them. If she didn't want a human being growing inside her, why would she mourn it?

[(Anonymous)]

Can you eat steak without mourning for the cow that gave it's innocent life for you? Some people are really upset and horrified by the idea of killing animals to eat them, and lots of aren't aren't. Some people even want it outlawed for religious reasons.

For lots of people getting a fetus removed is no more emotionally bothersome than preventing it in the first place with a condom, and some religions forbid even condoms because if God doesn't want you to have a baby he'll prevent it somehow so if you get pregnant it's God's will.

[(Anonymous)]

And she didn't think she was killing a person? That seems odd somehow.

[(Anonymous)]

Not sure if you're trolling, but a lot of people don't actually consider a fetus that's not even remotely capable of life outside the mother's body a person.

[(Anonymous)]

Are you anti-choice?

[esteefee]

What I mean by depicted is in the news media for the most part, those heartless wenches who have an abortion at the drop of a hat, or go to parties and then pop morning after pills. I'm not sure where else women are depicted as having abortions other than very occasionally in late night dramas and soap operas, and sure in those it's very distraught. If you're talking about fanfiction, hardly anyone in fanfiction has a voluntary abortion. In fact, there are exactly 3 abortion fics altogether in my fandom and mine is the only voluntary one. It's all about the happy bundle of joy in my fandom, and that includes in slash fandom. I think there need to be more voluntary abortion fic altogether in fandom before we can start worrying about *how* they're depicted.

[(Anonymous)]

What I mean by depicted is in the news media for the most part, those heartless wenches who have an abortion at the drop of a hat, or go to parties and then pop morning after pills

Ahh, okay, I understand. That would be really angering and would make me want to write narratives to counter it too. Perhaps because I'm Canadian, and live in one of the more progressive provinces at that, I don't have to experience nearly as much of that kind of demonizing and distorting of the reality of women who have abortions. Not that Canada doesn't have plenty of regressive, dogmatic conservatives, but the prevailing sentiment here is definitely that it's a woman's business, end of story. So I guess that probably influences my perspective on the whole issue.

Anyway, good for you for writing a fic where a character has a voluntary abortion. It is, as you say, extremely rare in fandom, and even though my ideal abortion scenario is one where a character has one without it being a big deal, I know that if I were in the fandom you write in, I would undoubtedly applaud your fic for involving a voluntary abortion at all. And, I mean, if it's true to your character that the procedure be hard for them, then of course it's a solid call to make as a writer, too.

[esteefee]

>the prevailing sentiment here is definitely that it's a woman's business, end of story

I envy you, truly. I think it used to be that way in the U.S. before the Reagan years changed the political landscape.

I do think about moving to Canada. Often.

In my story the character was really more "get it out of me, get it out of me now" in a body-horror sort of way (he canonically turned in a bug-hybrid at one point so the thought of having his body changed by pregnancy was horrifying to him) but after the abortion he felt some sadness in reaction and, of course, there was his partner to think about.