Case (
case) wrote in
fandomsecrets2015-12-18 06:42 pm
[ SECRET POST #3271 ]
⌈ Secret Post #3271 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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[Mysterious Universe Podcast]
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[Elias Ericson]
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[Danny Phantom]
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11. [SPOILERS for Jessica Jones]

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12. [SPOILERS for Homestuck]

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13. [SPOILERS for transformers: more than meets the eye #47]

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14. [WARNING for rape]

Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #467.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

OP
(Anonymous) 2015-12-19 12:43 am (UTC)(link)Life unrelentingly sucks. I was abused as a child. I had a breakdown. I got through it and got better. I had a steady job that I was good at, went to university for better qualifications for a better version of that job. I got sexually assaulted and had another breakdown. The anxiety and the fear made it impossible to hold a real job. I started freelance modelling and gt sexually assaulted a whole lot more. So I stopped. Unemployment and the utter lack of jobs in my area made me attempt suicide but I fucking survived.
I got better (again) and I started doing cam work because it was safer than modelling and better than being penniless. My physical health started to steadily decline. My flatmate suddenly moved and left me essentially homeless. All my savings got eaten up paying for housing. Cam got steadily shitter and shitter as I became less able to cope with the demands. I'm now living hand to mouth and relying on family for food. I have a chronic and serious illness but because it hasn't been diagnosed I can't get any financial help (the doctor suspects MS but I can't even get tested until the new year and it's been months and months of tests for other things).
I'm sick of it being hard all the time. I'm sick of shitty things constantly happening and I just can't do it anymore.
Re: OP
(Anonymous) 2015-12-19 12:48 am (UTC)(link)Re: OP
(Anonymous) 2015-12-19 01:03 am (UTC)(link)I know this is stupid to a lot of people and ignore it if it doesn't help you but I will be praying for you.
Re: OP
About the dreams, I'd try to do something interesting right after waking up and to not think about the dream. That way you won't remember it. Also, sounds silly, but camomile tea really helps with anxiety. There's a book called What Color Is Your Parachute that says that you can always change your situation at least in some small way. It also says that you should always have two options, like "I'll enroll at College OR I'll work in retail" or "I'll be 100% healthy OR not not 100% healthy but still ok". I have a 2013 edition of the book.