fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3300 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3300 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

__________________________________________________

10.

__________________________________________________

11.

__________________________________________________

12.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 076 secrets from Secret Submission Post #472.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I have a friend who is becoming a bit of a pain in the ass. She doesn't live close so I mostly communicate with her via internet (mostly twitter and tumblr).
Now, she is a person who prides herself on being so incredibly open minded, the kind of person you can rationally talk to about anything, she'll understand! And yeah, she used to be like that.
But since a year or two, she has gotten increasingly touchy and paranoid about everything. Recently, I complained about a certain type of thing I don't like people doing on twitter. It was a really general thing, but a few seconds later, I got a private message from her, complaining that I totally meant her with that comment and she was just wondering what she did to deserve it. I cleared it up (don't know if she believed me, though.)

Then one day later, she wrote a rant on tumblr about how she hates it when people vagueblog and it's totally rude and shitty and you shouldn't do it because she will always think you mean her and then she will feel so terrible!
And I'm kinda annoyed because a) now I feel kinda "vagued at" (her words, not mine) by that rant and I think it's damn hypocritical and b) she vagueblogs ALL THE FUCKING TIME. And c) now I'm not sure if I can write some general statements about things that bother me without having her think I'm vagueblogging about her.

Another thing: She is constantly whining that none of her friends care about her anymore and she doesn't have contact to them and waaah everyone is abandoning her. But... she has friends visiting her all the time and I think it's super rude of her to just dismiss them like that. Also, she never contacts me and other older friends of hers that don't live near her. And I'm kind of tired of running after her considering she always just complains or spams fandom shit at me that I'm not interested in.

Also, she whines that she is so terrible at social interactions. Thing is: She is perfectly aware of what she's doing wrong, she just is too lazy or self-obsessed to actually change it.

Then: She's an anti-shipper. She recently has discovered she's asexual and thinks now that all asexual people have zero interest in shipping. She keeps going on an on about how much romances and shipping annoys her, that she doesn't ~understand~ it and all. At the same time, she kept spamming everyone with her thought and gushing about the Ruby/Sapphire ship from Steven Universe. But because it's her, it's totally not shipping. Because shipping is stupid and everyone who ships characters is weird. All except her. Because she doesn't ship anyone, although she totally does.

I could go on and on about her. She has just become so aggrevating to talk to and I'm thinking about breaking off contact, but on the other hand, I'd feel guilty about being another one of her friends to abandon her.

Don't feel guilty. Some people are truly insufferable and can't be "fixed" through any amount of communication (which it sounds like you've attempted). People like that are just drains on emotional resources, and you're allowed to say you've had enough. I've had to do it before, and trust me, it's worth it to cut and run.

Well, I understand the guilt but not all friendships are meant to last forever. Sometimes they run their course, and it sounds like this one has. I certainly wouldn't stay it just to soothe your friend's abandonment issues because frankly, it doesn't sound like it'd make a difference. She's probably going to whine anyway.

Your friend has a great deal of control over how they treat people, so if they choose to behave this way, well, losing friends is their own fault, not yours or anyone else's. Maybe it'll be a wake up call for them.

Time to suggest she seek therapy. Seriously, it sound like she might me developing a mental illness and/or depression.

The personality shift could also indicate a tumor or a brain disease such as epilepsy.

She has some mental trouble but refuses therapy, and I'mnot that close to her. Her closer friends apparently suggested it before but she blew them off. Can't really force anyone to seek therapy.

Then one day later, she wrote a rant on tumblr about how she hates it when people vagueblog and it's totally rude and shitty and you shouldn't do it because she will always think you mean her and then she will feel so terrible!

Let me guess, she doesn't pride herself on self-awareness?

I hate to say this, but unless she's gotten into some hard drugs or super hideous people in the last couple of years, she's probably always been this annoying of a person. She's just been able to hide it better when you first knew her. I knew several folks like this, and they were rather narcissistic -- one had a problem to the point where he was ruining our circle of friends with his disgusting behavior.

In my experience, people who "pride" themselves on being X quality over just being X quality and not bragging about it probably aren't very X quality at all.

If you feel sorry for her and can handle her idiocy, it's up to you to stay in contact. However, if you cut her off, she will survive. She has the ability to make friends, and it's her responsibility to not drive them away with her toxicity, guilt trips and blackmailing. Keep your awesome friends and appreciate them. Life is too short to spend it with shitty people.

[ SECRET POST #3300 ]

Re: random rant (feel free to add your own)

Re: random rant (feel free to add your own)

Re: random rant (feel free to add your own)

Re: random rant (feel free to add your own)

Re: random rant (feel free to add your own)

Re: random rant (feel free to add your own)