fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3304 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3304 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Law & Order SVU]

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03.

[Leonardo DiCaprio]

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04.

(Penny Dreadful: Caliban/John Clare)

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05.

[Star Wars]

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06.

[Kumail Nanjiani, The X-Files]

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07.

[Shin Megami Tensei X Fire Emblem]

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08.

[Love Live!]

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09.

[Severus Snape and the Marauders]

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10.

[Sherlock Holmes]

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11.

[Making a Murderer, Dean Strang and Jerry Buting]

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12.

[Colony]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 027 secrets from Secret Submission Post #472.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm a virgin in my 30's. When I finally get a boyfriend, how do I bring that up in a way that isn't awkward?

Well, you don't necessarily need to bring it up, just throwing that out there.

NAYRT but in a similar situation and it... frankly seems both inadvisable and kinda dishonest not to bring it up?

I don't know. It's just hard to imagine how that would play out in a way that would be healthy and mutually satisfactory.

I dunno, I don't think I mentioned (though I was younger). I know it's odd, it just never really came up.

dishonest? lmao, no one is entitled to know your sexual history

I don't know.

Just to bring up one possible issue: what if knowing my lack of sexual history would have changed their decision regarding whether to sleep with me or not? That hardly seems impossible, and if it were the case, it kinda feels like the possibility would obligate me to share that information.

'P-Please be gentle tonight!' ʕつ ͡◔ ᴥ ͡◔ʔつ

You don't have to. It's completely up to you whether or not you think it's important.

For example: let's say you have a boyfriend you don't feel all that serious about, and you wouldn't really care about dumping. You don't feel like you really want to share much emotion or personal information, and you'd rather just have a lot of sex and learn about yourself that way. That might be a situation where you decide it's not so important if you reveal your sexual history.

On the other hand, you might feel very strongly about a boyfriend before you decide to have sex. In this situation you might want to tell him you've never had sex before in order for him to understand that you might not really know what you're doing or you feel nervous/self-conscious/etc. That would be a perfectly valid reason to want to bring it up.

The bottom line is there's no magical way someone you're having sex with is going to know that you've never had sex before. If you do want to bring it up, do so well before the heat of the moment. I suggest something along the lines of, "So, I've never done the deed so to speak. Mind if we take it slow?"

You can also employ the old, "So, before we get into things, can I ask you how your first time was?" which lets you start up a conversation about it without putting all the pressure on yourself.

Good luck, anon!

You could be vague about it, like, "I don't have much experience."

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