[ SECRET POST #3309 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3309 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 053 secrets from Secret Submission Post #473.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: TW: Rape mention

[blitzwing]

No, because I didn't convert to anything. This is more "I escaped from a fundamentalist cult, only now can I see how truly bizarre and toxic it was."

Re: TW: Rape mention

[(Anonymous)]

DA but what kind of batshit feminists were you hanging around with that you consider it a "fundamentalist cult"? I've seen the extremists at either end and had the worst of it from both of them but most people of any belief system I meet are more moderate. If I want to believe that the extremists are representative of a group or movement, well, that's a choice I actively have to make.

Is it because you're non-binary and you interacted with a lot of those idiot TERFs?

Re: TW: Rape mention

[blitzwing]

but what kind of batshit feminists were you hanging around with that you consider it a "fundamentalist cult"?

Pretty much every feminist group I've been around in the last decade. I was a SJ/feminist blogger though, so I was probably more deeply immersed in the SJ/feminist scene than many feminists.

Is it because you're non-binary and you interacted with a lot of those idiot TERFs?

No, I've barely interacted with TERFs, if anything. That's the good thing about being a member of a fundamentalist sect (in this case, modern feminists), they protect you from those with opposing views that contradict doctrine. And by "protect" I mean threaten to shun you if you have any sort of polite relationship with members of the enemy out-group.

Not that I feel like I've missed anything by being kept from the TERFs.

Re: TW: Rape mention

[(Anonymous)]

SA: It sucks that you've had those experiences and I understand why you'd be wary of larger groups of belief systems.

My experience has been completely different. Maybe because I hang around with people similar in beliefs to myself but all the feminists I know are actively against the more egregious forms of sexism (including issues which only affect men) and extremely vocal in their disagreements with TERFs and other people who try to legitimise bigotry using feminist rhetoric they either don't understand or are wilfully misinterpreting for their own ends. They all think shirtgate and manspreading is nonsense that detracts from actual issues. And they often criticise feminist theory and disagree even with each other about interpretations of certain ones.

I totally get how the worst of the movement drives people away, though. Hell, I'm a feminist bisexual sex worker so I've had other feminists actively tell me I can't be one because of that. I've also had antifeminists tell me I can't be one because I don't fit in with the ugly manhating stereotype. O_o

Your Christian analogy kind of falls flat with me. I'm not American. The majority of Catholics in my country voted to legalise gay marriage and our equivalent of Plan B has been legal and free to anyone who asks for it since the 80s. You've been exposed to the worst of the worst and your beliefs reflect that experience. I've been exposed to people who use their political beliefs to make the world better and mine reflects that.

Re: TW: Rape mention

[(Anonymous)]

SA. Although if I'd been a social justice blogger and regularly had to interact with them I'd probably have gouged out my own eyes by now.

Re: TW: Rape mention

[blitzwing]

It sucks that you've had those experiences and I understand why you'd be wary of larger groups of belief systems.

Yeah, I'm largely avoiding adopting any social group identities unless truly necessary. I believe that such identities, while they have their uses, contribute to the things like I mentioned above, like out-group-homogeneity-bias. They often feed generalizations and stereotyping, which in turn feed oppression and hate.

I am glad you have found some fellow feminists that are critical and think for themselves. I have some feminist friends that are so as well (they are an extreme minority of my experience with feminists though).

Your Christian analogy kind of falls flat with me.

I thought it might be so, which is why I wiped it at the last moment. I'm sorry for having you read such a long-winded ramble, when it wasn't even informative.

Re: TW: Rape mention

[(Anonymous)]

I understand. Honestly, I do. When I was a teenager and emotionally immature because, well, I was also not physically mature I used to froth at the mouth a bit about people not identifying as feminists. Now I understand that what someone calls themselves is inconsequential as long as they act decently. Kind of glad Tumblr didn't even exist back then :D

Re: TW: Rape mention

[(Anonymous)]

DA

I kind of want to apologize to you, 'cause while it's only been once or twice, I've engaged you on your anti-feminist views before, and in very knee-jerk ways. I didn't think to listen to your side of the story, and now having read it, I think I get where you're coming from. What you're exposed to is obviously going to form your opinions, and your experiences have been overwhelmingly negative.

I do hope you continue to meet critical, self-thinking feminists, and less 'toe-the-party-line' feminists. Even if you choose not to take on the label again, it'd be a good thing.