[ SECRET POST #3314 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3314 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 072 secrets from Secret Submission Post #474.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: vent vent vent

[(Anonymous)]

On top of everyone else's helpful advice, definitely seconding having a system with your girlfriend so that she has a go to of something like a book or an anecdote that she can just start saying when you get into a panic attack.

Since you know your girlfriend is having a hard time knowing how to react, you could also try to work out a way to deal with panic attacks with her in particular, like focusing on looking at a particular body part while doing what you need to do to calm down. And if you go this route, make sure you tell her that's what you're going to do when you have a panic attack so she doesn't get self conscious.

If you guys can't work out a system like that, another option is to look away from your girlfriend when you feel the panic building so her silence doesn't affect you as much.

Whatever you decide to do, have a calm conversation about it with your girlfriend prior. Let her know that it's not her fault and it's something you're trying to work on, and then work on it. Thinking of working on your anxiety as an aspect of working on your relationship might actually help you make progress, as it might make it seem less personal and more like a job, i.e. something you don't necessarily like doing or would choose to do on your own, but something you have to do because that's how life works.

Disclaimer: layman's advice. Don't have personal experience with panic attacks, but have plenty experience with working on anxiety issues and working through relationship problems. Add whatever size salt grain you feel is warranted.

PS: if you only take one piece of advice from this whole thread, the advice to stop catastrophising is a gem. That shit never helps anyone, and once you start being able to challenge those thoughts a lot of things will start seeming easier.