Sooo, you're not alone. I worked at a famous bra store in the fitting rooms. I wasn't out at work, 'cause I didn't want some homophobe to fire me for some stupid reason. There were two times in the two years I worked there that I had to go hide behind the curtain for a second and just think, "hot DAMN is she attractive." Then get on with my life.
So yes, it feels like being a leery lesbian, but no, it's not being a creep. I wasn't making advances toward these women, I wasn't making comments to my coworkers or even my friends later except to tell the story about hiding behind the curtain.
Sexual feelings have been demonized in so many ways from so many perspectives that's hard to reconcile anything regarding sex. But it's perfectly natural to find someone attractive based on the social expectations and personal preference of appearance.
The creeper part is if you start making comments, can't peel your eyes off them, start talking about them with someone you're with (whether or not they can hear you), or make some kind of advance. At a con, that's not what cosplay is for. Cosplay is for the fun of turning into someone else, so admire them for that and keep your other -ahem- admirations to yourself, and you're golden.
You can still be an activist. It doesn't mean you have to be perfect all the time, 'cause that's too much pressure for anyone. You can be sexual, just don't force your admiration on anyone.
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So yes, it feels like being a leery lesbian, but no, it's not being a creep. I wasn't making advances toward these women, I wasn't making comments to my coworkers or even my friends later except to tell the story about hiding behind the curtain.
Sexual feelings have been demonized in so many ways from so many perspectives that's hard to reconcile anything regarding sex. But it's perfectly natural to find someone attractive based on the social expectations and personal preference of appearance.
The creeper part is if you start making comments, can't peel your eyes off them, start talking about them with someone you're with (whether or not they can hear you), or make some kind of advance. At a con, that's not what cosplay is for. Cosplay is for the fun of turning into someone else, so admire them for that and keep your other -ahem- admirations to yourself, and you're golden.
You can still be an activist. It doesn't mean you have to be perfect all the time, 'cause that's too much pressure for anyone. You can be sexual, just don't force your admiration on anyone.