fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3344 ]

[ SECRET POST #3344 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3344 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia]

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03.

[The Vision/Wanda Maximoff (Marvel's The Avengers)]

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04.

[New Tricks]

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05.

[One Punch Man]

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06.

[Karen Page, Daredevil (Netflix)]

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07.

[Gamer's Guide to Pretty Much Everything]

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08.

[Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D]

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09.

[Good Omens]

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10.

[J.K. Rowling]

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11.

[Ace Attorney 6]

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12.

(Borderlands, Dameon Clarke)

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 056 secrets from Secret Submission Post #478.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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i wanna contexualize mine

Mixed. On the surface it is good. We talk, we're friendly and loving, they're helpful. Except their extremely homophobic and the only reason our relationship is so good is because I haven't come out to them as bi. So its only good because I'm hiding that part of myself.

Distant but trying to work on it, I guess. They've always supported me in the basic need sort of way and money-wise, but we'd get into arguments a lot so I ended up avoiding them to prevent all the yelling. My mom was pretty helicopter-y too. I never felt comfortable going to them for advice either.

My mother has been dead for 7 years. My father got out of jail for manslaughter 8 years ago and is a barely functional alcoholic. I see him maybe twice a year when he shows up out of the blue.

Good but distant in regards to my father. Which is weird because he raised me but now we live so far apart we never see each other.

Both my parents are abusive in different ways, to the point where I didn't realize my mother was abusive until much later. That said, I still have a relationship with my mother, I don't with my father.

My dad's been gone nearly six years, but I always had a good relationship with him, and have a good one with my mom as well. We had/have a lot of the same taste in things, we're on the same page politically, I can talk to my mom about anything, and could do the same with my dad, and my parents have always been supportive of my sister and me, and helped us out when we needed it.

That's not to say I never fought with my parents-I did. But it was when I was a teenager, and was typical teenager/parent sorts of stuff. Nothing too dramatic.

My dad was something of an overgrown manchild who hadn't updated his political views since 1986 and saw no reason to. He also tended to view his wife and child as pets and would get angry when we didn't do what we were told. After my mom divorced him he joined all the divorce support groups to keep mom from joining them and told everyone he could about all the terrible things she'd done to him, which in reality were literally all the terrible things he'd done to her.

My mother is a religious weirdo with control issues. You do the math. I learned to lie just to have a life of my own.

I love them both anyway, and I miss my dad every day, but the most important thing I ever got from either of them was some distance -- even if it wasn't necessarily physical.

Re: What's your relationship with your parents like?

(Anonymous) - 2016-03-01 01:31 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What's your relationship with your parents like?

dethtoll - 2016-03-01 01:39 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What's your relationship with your parents like?

(Anonymous) - 2016-03-01 01:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What's your relationship with your parents like?

(Anonymous) - 2016-03-01 02:40 (UTC) - Expand

Great, overall. My parents are really important to me.

My mom and I did bicker a lot, and in high school I had pretty serious depression and anxiety and her parenting style probably just made things worse. But overall, my parents were really good parents, I think. They balanced being strict and chill really well. We were all really well-behaved and high achievers in school, and never cared to get involved in any high risk activity. I think my parents and I especially have a better relationship now that I don't live with them.

Good. Really, really, abnormally good. Even when I was a bratty teenager rebelling against TEH EVUL ADULT SOCIETY, I still mostly got on well with my parents. I think I might be the only person I know who has a good relationship with their parents, which used to sadden me, but I get that sometimes people have to cut ties with family for being horrible, or if they just plain don't get along.

I have a close relationship with my parents. They've been married 35 years, love each other, love me, and go out of their way to help me if I ask for it (I rarely do).

But secretly I feel like my mother has been punishing me my entire life for ever daring to need my umbilical cord cut, and if she died tomorrow, I would feel relieved to be free of her emotional control.

Pretty amazing. Honestly, my mom and I are incredibly close and do a lot together. We'll vacation together, go out to lunch together, shop, and I still live at home so I see her all of the time as it is.

My dad and I bicker and fight a lot more, but we're both incredibly stubborn and we'll defend each other when necessary and understand where the other is sometimes coming from.

I'm blessed to have a good relationship with my parents because I was a terrible, terrible teenager but I went really far away for college and that definitely strengthened my relationship with them.

It's okay. I love them. I call my mom every week, though I have to steer clear of some topics of conversation with her. My dad I don't speak with as much. He was an alcoholic asshole while we were growing up. He's somewhat better now.

Great. The only thing I'd wish for is for my mom to be into genre stuff or for my dad to be better at discussing stuff or conversation in general. But, we agree on a lot of the same stuff, and we can live together with few issues. I definitely feel lucky to have them as my parents.

My mom is my best friend, my dad...we're working on it, I guess.

Egalitarian and adult, with my mom. My dad has been dead for ... dang. Over a decade now.

My parents were good parents. I was raised an atheist, feminist, academic, and scientist by people who wanted to be friends with their children when they were adults and who let us make our own decisions without harassment or judgement.

The more I learn about other people's parents, the more I realize mine did damn near everything right.

We get on pretty well, I'm closer to my dad than my mum but that's simply because me and my dad are pretty similar humour and personality-wise but I still get on with my mum absolutely fine, she just doesn't always understand why I'm excited about certain geeky things sometimes.

Time to Get Real......complicated. We make each other laugh, and I love and admire them very much. But there are things they've said and done, both with regards to me and my brother or just in their lives, that I can't quite reconcile. There are times I feel like they raised me with a moral code they abandoned sometime a few years ago. For various reasons, I feel bad for them; for various other reasons, I'll always be at least a little mad at them. I hope that I can be as good a parent as they were to my brother and I when we were small, but extricate myself from some of the ugliness that happened later on. Addiction scares me because I've seen the first and secondhand damage it's done to them. There are times when I truly can't understand why they'd ever make the choices they made, but there are also things they've done I hope I'd be strong enough to do with the grace they did. I wish they were less weird about me being gay, but I know in the grand scheme of things, I'm lucky on that count. We're best when we're distant, but I know I got my humor and my bullheadedness from them, and both of those are a lot of who I am and how I fare forward.

Well, when my dad died, and my mom told me he'd been run over, my first response was a big relieved grin and a "finally!"--the crying started later. People used to think he was dead before he died, because I talked about him in the past tense. He saved my life once, but he never wanted kids and definitely not girls. He was dyslexic and in great physical shape and a dictator about what my mom and I ate, what we could spend money on, and how much we exercised. He didn't understand what reading and books meant to me and that when I was freaking out because I was a short fat nerd and didn't know how to handle bullies, "kill them," a knife, and instructions on where to stab were no help whatsoever. And then he became a drug addict, spent all my parents' savings, my mom divorced him, and he died. We were never sure if it was suicide or not.

My mom was a buffer between my dad and me and was artistic, creative, kind, and generous. She was and is also a drunk. She has terminal cancer, and when she goes I'll be inconsolable, but when our bad depression days coincide, and she's drunk or drugged (or both) herself into a sullen stupor, and I scream that I can't take watching her attempt suicide every day and I hate it and wish she'd get it over with, her response is either "fuck off," or "I always knew you must hate me, you'll be better off when I'm dead."

My father is incredibly intelligent, generous, patient, considerate. A lifelong feminist. Very liberally, politically. He's a bit of an iconoclast. We have similar taste in music, movies, TV. He's my best friend and always has been. He knows me better than anyone else ever will, and I've never seen him use that knowledge unfairly.

My mother is...she believes she's generous but she's actually a very stingy person - tightfisted about everything. She seems to view children as inherently less important than adults. If they make themselves helpful and agreeable and appreciate her (like elves in a workshop), she likes them, but if they don't behave like little helper elves, she thinks they're spoiled and bratty and deserve to be punished. She's not someone who's ever had much use for intellectual pursuits, though she's not stupid. Nor is she a hateful or close-minded person in general.

Now that I'm an adult, living completely independent of her, she and I have both made the effort to build a mother/daughter relationship that works for us. And I'm glad for it. I've accepted that she'll probably never acknowledge any of the things she did that hurt me so badly, shaped me, made me grow up the way I am. But that doesn't mean I've forgiven her, or that I feel like I need to. The child part of me might hate her a little, but I'm fine with that; I can love her with the part of me that's an adult.

A case of keeping my mouth shut and trying not to yell. They were never interested in me as such, only in themselves or what I could do for them (being my mother's marriage guidance counsellor, primarily.) They certainly helped in material ways but I never got the impression they cared about me. When they go, which will be in the not too distant future, I'll mourn the relationship I wish we had.

I feel so guilty about this but it's what you do, not what you think, that counts, or so I've heard?

What's your relationship with your parents like, OP?

It's pretty good. My parents are both amazing, hardworking people who always took time to make me and my sisters feel appreciated and loved. They always took time to helps us out with homework and take us to the park. I have no reason to complain about them and I feel pretty rotten for what I'm about to write next.

I know my parents mean well, but sometimes I feel like their love is a little smothering. I live with them for financial reasons, but I pay rent and my own bills and help around the house with chores and stuff. Since I live with them, I feel like they think I'm not grown-up enough. I mentioned that I was going to go do my taxes last week and they kept wanting to go with me because they thought I wouldn't know what to do and might get cheated out of a return. They want to be the ones to set up my doctor's appointments and pack my lunches. They want to do a lot of hand holding and it drives me a little nuts, but it doesn't feel right to complain about it because I know they're just doing things like that because they love me.

It's fine. They're good parents despite the disagreements we have. However I honestly feel nothing for them. As long as I knew they were doing okay, I could live with never seeing them again and it would make no difference to me.

Chill? We get along better as adults but sometimes I think they miss their little girl. Pretty supportive.

Good? I love them, they love me, they've got problems but only in that everyone's-got-problems way like money stress and differences of opinions. They were never abusive or neglectful in any way and always tried their best to do right by my brother and me, but my mom's an alcoholic, and for various reasons I'm gonna have to move back in with them in a few months. I feel conflicted about that but have no other choice.

Re: What's your relationship with your parents like?

(Anonymous) - 2016-03-01 22:45 (UTC) - Expand

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