fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3355 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3355 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

[The Lord of the Rings]

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02.

[Digimon Story: Cyber Sleuth]

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03.

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04.

[Partners in Crime]

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05.

[The 100]

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06.

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07.

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08. [SPOILERS for Undertale]

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09. [SPOILERS for The 100]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #479.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I do try to be self reflective and engage with this dialogue. I don't think that requires me to lineup to get personally yelled at. I certainly don't think that'd be healthy for me.

The other dynamic here, I think, is that there is - from the point of view of a motivated critique - no thing that could ever be enough. You can always find some flaw or think of some other mode of structural oppression. Which I think is kind of an accurate attitude, derived from the fact that structural oppression is super human - that is to say it is historic and systemic and massive in scope. But we still have to live as human beings, you know? So it just feels like a very self defeating thing to try to talk about whether your own practice matches up to the scale of the thing.

I don't think that requires me to lineup to get personally yelled at. I certainly don't think that'd be healthy for me.

Why are you so defensive? Nobody is yelling at you. I'm not yelling at you.

So it just feels like a very self defeating thing to try to talk about whether your own practice matches up to the scale of the thing.

So your solution is... to do as little as possible?

Why are you so defensive? Nobody is yelling at you. I'm not yelling at you.

Because there is one way this conversation has ever gone on the Internet.

So your solution is... to do as little as possible?

No, I try to do what I can. I try to be mindful about my own practices and life choices and behavior (which I think is a moral requirement) and I try to support pro-woman policies and be aware and listen as much as possible and all of that But my point is that from a certain point of view nothing could ever be enough, and I have my own personal limitations as a person. So no matter what I did someone could always come along and yell at me for not doing enough.

OP here. I think someone is imitating me in an attempt to make this seem like I'm a crazy asshole. Sorry.

I don't see what was so crazy about those questions.

Fair enough. Replace Crazy for Judgey.

They're only as judgey as the original question.

I'd agree, so to a degree I can understand why people might be hesitant to answer the thread. I'm trying to put people at ease as best I can (now. I did slip up and accuse someone of being defensive why they may not have been. Oops.) but Yeah, I suppose people are going to be nervouse about talking openly about this.

The second part of that comment is remarkably well thought out. I kind of agree, and I thank you for sharing your thoughts.

The question as you wrote it came off as suspiciously loaded. The use of the word "enough" implies a subjective limit, as someone downthread posited. This is why people don't want to answer it.

F!S has dealt with radfem trolls for a number of years and questions worded exactly like this are basically traps set by trolls so they can yell at someone for giving a "wrong" answer -- and all the answers are wrong. Instead of getting defensive (while accusing others of being defensive and aggressive) and insisting that the question wasn't loaded, you could actually explain what the fuck you were trying to get at when you asked that question.

I did respond below to that, but let me reiterate. "Enough" related to the question of whether people meet their own subjective limit.

I am aware of our history with the more ... forceful people here. I am not one of them, as demonstrated by the fact that I have shown no judgement or lack of respect to the few people who did answer my question. And saving that one slip up, which I point out again, I apologised for, I have been as respectful as possible to everyone.

What I was trying to get at has been explained already: I wanted to know if people lived up to their own ideas in this matter, and where those ideals sit. I insist the question wasn't loaded because it wasn't and that is what people keep throwing at me.

Maybe try this again tomorrow or perhaps better Monday, and rewrite the question to be more elaborate as to your intent. You could have asked directly, "do you feel you live up to your own standards on this?" You didn't, and now we have this shitshow of a thread you started. Good job.

AYRT

Yeah, I get where you were coming from now, and I apologize for being snappish, it's been a long day. And it is... extremely, extremely loaded territory, you know? So anyway, yeah, sorry about that.

Don't worry about it.

[ SECRET POST #3355 ]

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