Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2016-03-13 04:15 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2016-03-13 04:15 pm
[ SECRET POST #3357 ]
⌈ Secret Post #3357 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 078 secrets from Secret Submission Post #480.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
Re: confession thread
I feel like that in person, too. I really have zero things to say, and yesterday my aunt was asking me what my plans were and what university degree I'm thinking about, and I couldn't say that I probably won't get one now since I don't think I'll be able to repay any loans I get and I doubt I could handle anywhere near the amount of prolonged concentration and energy to study. Then my uncle was trying to tell me he was sure I was going to get better soon and he was asking me how long I thought it would take for me to get better.
I know I had a good day yesterday and I should be happy but I guess it just confuses people and I don't want to bring down the mood by telling them I can't make big plans and I'm not actually better. I usually pay for having good days because I overdo it. I had a fall earlier and I feel like hell, but nobody will actually see that because I don't want them to.
I hate complaining. I don't want to be complaining.
The only time I've felt positive about the future recently was when I looked into euthanasia. That's cheerful.
Re: confession thread
Re: confession thread
I just needed to unload, but not on any of the people that I'm close to. I don't think that's very fair on them. Also, the euthanasia stuff would probably freak them out.
I just feel better when I can plan for all eventualities. Even the super depressing ones where I don't have any good days or quality of life.
Re: confession thread
Of course it's not good to constantly unload on people, but your loved ones care about you - don't keep everything bottled away from them either :)
Re: confession thread
(Anonymous) 2016-03-14 05:57 am (UTC)(link)Re: confession thread
Re: confession thread
You don't have to pretend to be positive to me, in case you were wondering or on the fence. I'm intimately familiar with where you are right now... I just happened to win the chronic/terminal illness lottery. The roughest part is trying to reassure friends that you're all right when you're definitively not because it's easier to deal with your own pain than deal with the pain of others.
If you ever need to vent to someone who understands and isn't going to feel overly sorry for you, I'd be glad to listen. Plus, I have a lot of experience listening, and I promise I'm only a jerk and a troll about stuff that isn't serious lol.
Re: confession thread
Yeah. I am super tired right now so I was just nodding in agreement rather than actually typing a reply.
You are allowed to feel sorry for me if you ever feel the need to express your emotions with baked goods. Just saying.