[ SECRET POST #3464 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3464 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 27 secrets from Secret Submission Post #495.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Do you have any triggers?

[soldatsasha]

Not... specific ones. Not in the way people usually mean. My PTSD and panic+anxiety attacks and obsessive thoughts are triggered more by specific trains of thought and specific emotions than external stimuli, I guess?

Like, I can read all the horrific rape fic I want, or watch a video of gangbang porn, or read people's accounts of it, and that in itself won't bother me. It lacks the emotional resonance that I was feeling at the time of the trauma. But infidelity, especially between people or characters I care about, will set me right off because I empathize too much with the person who was betrayed.

I also have to be careful with character deaths in fiction. If I see or read about a character dying, it sometimes flips over in my head to where I'll feel like that character is dying for real. Like they'll be gone forever, just erased from existence, like they were never created at all. I guess this is because of the abandonment portion of my traumatic experiences?

There's other more straight forward ones, but they don't affect me as much. Loud noises like fireworks or thunder, if I'm not expecting it. Extreme heat like from a fire or oven. People looming.

ETA: the nonny below reminded me. Sleep deprivation as a means of manipulation, and tampering with medications. especially tampering with them as a means of fucking with someone's head. NOPE