fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3514 ]

[ SECRET POST #3514 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3514 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Love it or List it]

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[ALF]

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Notes:

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Does anyone else have any kinks they wish they didn't have?

All of them. I wish I didn't have a libido.

NAYRT

Why do you say that?

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-17 23:25 (UTC) - Expand

same here tbh. I don't like sex but I'm still always horny and end up masturbating at least once a day. I think life would be easier if I just didn't feel the urge

I feel you. I would be a lot less frustrated and able to concentrate on other things if I had no libido.

I recently realized that one of my biggest kinks, something I didn't even realize I had, is something I really wish didn't turn me on as much as it does.

So for some odd reason I have this kink for sex scenes that are only about one person. Either they are being selfish and only care about getting themselves off, or their partner is totally focused on them and doesn't care about getting off (and my not even get off).

It doesn't seem to matter to me which partner is which. Just, if only one person is the focus, instant turn on for me. It makes me uncomfortable because it is something I like not just in fic, but in porn (though I wish mainstream porn were more equal opportunity about it and let it be all about the woman sometimes). And I worry that this particular kink might actually affect me in real life.

But I'm not even sure if it is possible to get rid of a kink.

If you're worried about this affecting your sex life, idk that it necessarily would? Not all sex has to be focused on both partners getting off. I think a lot of BDSM-type stuff can tend towards the kind of sexual encounter where only one person is really getting 'sexed up.' And since you said it doesn't matter which partner, presumably if you were dating someone it wouldn't cause much friction as long as you switched back and forth. Or, did your kinky scene and then took a little break and came back for the other person?

I can't really think why anyone would really object to the kind of tag-team sex you're describing once you've explained it really gets you going. Tbeing able to be turned on by focusing attention only on your partner seems like a big plus for your sex life.

If you're willing to switch it up with mutual pleasure if your partner wants that, what's the issue?

As someone who gets off on getting my partner off (it's a control thing) it's not necessarily a bad thing? Especially if you recognize it and make sure that even if your partner's needs aren't being met in THAT session, that they get met in another session that IS all about them?

Third party forcing other men to have sex with each other. I've almost ficced about it but I figure its too disturbing for most readers.

There's an entire H/C fic subgenre called 'Aliens made them do it' for a reason. It's all good.

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 00:07 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 00:17 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 07:06 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 01:14 (UTC) - Expand

Like this: http://archiveofourown.org/works/922826 or more explicitly non-con?

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 02:20 (UTC) - Expand

noncon

the only way I can really get off anymore is if I either read noncon fic or imagine that someone is forcing me to have sex and it's starting to make me wonder if I have some genuine problems

Weight gain.

(I'm fine with it staying in fantasy though. I'm actually helping my SO lose weight atm. I feel kinda weird about it at times but it's okay.)

I wish I didn't have any of my kinks. Apparently everything that gets me off is terrible and problematic. Sometimes I go into crying fits just wishing I could be a normal person with normal sexual fantasies so I wouldn't have to spend my life feeling this unbearable shame.

Have you considered seeing a sexual therapist about these feelings of shame? I feel like talking to someone might help you work through your feelings.

As long as something is either consensual or exists only in fantasy (and any depictions of that fantasy aren't coerced), you're good. If you aren't hurting anyone, why are you hurting yourself?

underage (not straight up pedo, but I've gotten close a few times if I'm honest)

I very rarely indulge in it though. There are other things that get me off. And whatever dynamic appeals to me in statutory rape can usually be duplicated in less ethically dubious ways.
It seems to me, the more you get off to the stuff you know is wrong, the more strongly the association becomes between unacceptable things and good orgasms. And I don't want that!

Congratulations on being able to choose what gets you off.

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 00:46 (UTC) - Expand

Yea, but it's pretty tame (like I'm pretty sure most people wouldn't even bat an eye if they found out) and I don't think about it too often/seek it out. It's kinda just... there, and when I come across it (again, a non-offensive, popular kink) it's kinda like whatever I guess.

Is it even a kink if it's not uncommon in popular media even and I don't care about it that much?

Wild guess, but are you the sneezing/something to do with nose blowing kink anon from a secret a while back?

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 04:45 (UTC) - Expand

Both of these are awful but forced impreg and corrective rape porn turn me on. I am a lesbian. I am literally horrified by myself and wish they didn't :/

my biggest kink involves men in high heels and stockings. ...and pegging.
it's kind of a problem sometimes because i'm not really interested in "vanilla sex" with men (i'm a dominant bi woman) and so far i've never ever had sex with one because i'm kind of scared men would be put off by my kinks.
idek man sexuality and kinks are awkward in general. wish i had none of this shit sometimes

fwiw, I'm sure there's plenty of men out there who would Not Mind At Allllll

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 07:09 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Kinks you wish you didn't have

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-18 01:50 (UTC) - Expand

Sketchy, emotionally manipulative and coercive sex, between older dude and younger lady of younger dude. Especially if the lady is pinned down face first.

Being a sadist.

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