fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3800 ]

[ SECRET POST #3800 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3800 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Killing Stalking]

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[The 100, Echo and Bellamy]

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04.

[Anne (the new remake of L.M. Montgomery's Anne of Green Gables)]

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05.

[Pokémon ORAS]

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06.

[Homestuck]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 24 secrets from Secret Submission Post #544.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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When I was at work today, letting my mind drift while doing some tedious, soul-sucking task as usual, my thoughts turned to Arranged Marriage AUs and the Arranged Marriage trope in Romance novels and fiction in general.

I love this trope myself, and I know it's really popular, but what are your thoughts on ~~yaoi~~ why? Arranged marriages were the norm for centuries in our collective memories and are still happening today around the world, so most of us probably know someone (either personally today or know of someone in our family history) who had an arranged marriage that was not happy. So what is it about the idea that makes it so popular in fiction and fanfiction?

My thoughts:

In smut/explicit romance/sexual fantasy, I see it as a "more genteel" version of a rape fantasy, in that it involves being forced (but not violently or scarily) to have sex with someone despite your reluctance, at least at first. But not even going that far, it's also a scenario of forced (again, though, not violently) intimacy and vulnerability with a near-stranger.

Even in a PG-rated/non-sexually explicit story, it usually involves both people in the couple starting off shy and awkward around each other, learning to deal with each other in more intimate circumstances than they would usually be in with near-strangers (handling the household chores, eating meals together, socializing with others), and then falling in love.

But, like, why does this appeal to me more than a story that's basically got the same components, just in a different order? Feeling shy, falling in love, getting married, being intimate and domestic. That's not nearly as fun for me to read, for some reason.

IDK...who else feels this way, and what do you think about all this?

Yeah, I totally get what you're saying. I think that putting it out of order helps you to highlight it and emphasize specific aspects of it, and also provides an excuse to really spend a lot of time focusing on that while still fitting it into a fairly logical plot? In particular, the matter of "people in a couple navigating how to be a couple together" is actually pretty different in an arranged marriage scenario versus a more typical relationship narrative.

Also, people just love Beatrice and Benedick stuff.

Also, personally, for me, the arranged marriage trope happens to facilitate a lot of relationship dynamics that I typically like, specifically people who don't believe they'll ever be in love and are surprised and ambushed and bushwhacked by love.

I'll come at this from a writer's POV, it's a little like sex pollen or even A/O/B - it's a ready-made conflict that immediately puts two people together in a romantic situation. You can bypass the getting-to-know-you stuff that takes a while to develop well and can drag the story. You can bypass trying to come up with a situation to have these two interact in a way that develops the romance. Especially for pairings where canon would make romance a hard sell, it pushes them that way with minimal setup and lets the story focus on the conflict of their personalities or the conflict of their romance, rather than on coming up with a believable way they would decide to marry or date.

The conflict makes the story interesting but the fact that there should be a happy ending (for those who don't like subversion) is reassuring.

I think the appeal breaks down into a few categories:

-Taboo. It's out of the ordinary and it's interesting, and it comes with its own unique set of challenges.

-Arranged marriage fanfic is a great way to pair off two characters who outright hate each other in canon or who aren't friends or don't know each other that well, or whatever. It's an easy set-up to throw them together and force them to learn to understand one another so that the arranged marriage eases into a functional marriage they choose to stay in.

-I personally just love romantic stories involving characters who don't like each other but who come to respect and then love one another. It's my fave. Idk. I think respect is really important, and I think that's the common ground all Arranged Marriage trope stories break: taking you on a journey of two characters finding respect for each other.

Your response really resonates with me -- the arranged marriage pairings that I really enjoy always have some element of being interesting people who, for whatever reason, the other person would not normally choose to get to know. Throwing them together into an immediately-close relationship under the same roof lets them break down those barriers and learn why they're each pretty cool people that they then grow to love and (you're very right on this point) respect.

Omg, you just made me remember the Harry Potter Marriage Law Challenge! I like(d) it because it was an easy way to throw two people together who would normally be difficult to ship or pair off under normal circumstances. I saw it as a fun way to try out a rare pair!

I read some meta on that trope that stuck with me; a very charitable interpretation, leaving aside the sexual stuff, is that Arranged Marriages that work out is basically a fantasy about you/most humans actually being unique, deep-thinking, interesting people that anyone would love if they just took (were made to take) the time to get to truly know them. Y'know? It's actually a very roundabout validation "kink"/human need.

Yes, this makes sense!

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[ SECRET POST #3800 ]

Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?

Re: Arranged marriage trope -- why so popular?