fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3819 ]

[ SECRET POST #3819 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3819 ⌋

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

NAYRT
I don't understand why victim blaming is 100% bad. Lessons learned used to be a thing. It's stupid for people to share their personal data online, but now we're supposed to pretend that it wasn't stupid for them to do that? Of course it was fucking stupid!

because it ignores the actual problem, viz, the people who are actually committing the crime or doing the bad things

TO give an example. Victim blaming means teaching women it is their responsibility to avoid being raped while not actually bothering to fucking teach men not to go a'raping. Stop asking "why was she wearing a short skirt after midnight" and start asking "who is protecting that fucking raping rapist who rapes". Wearing a short skirt after midnight is not illegal, but rape is. How come it is the former that gets all the attention?

But we're not talking about rape.

Put it this way: do you lock the doors of your home? Will your insurance company pay out if you leave the doors unlocaked or the windows open and you're robbed? People absolutely can take precautions to safeguard their identity, their personal belongings, and themselves. And these particular people did the exact opposite.

It's not relevant to the question of whether or not they deserved to be harassed, or really relevant to talking about their harassment

like, if you want to have a symposium about privacy and identity on the Internet, there's nothing wrong with that. the problem is when it's your response to someone getting harassed. that's where it's inadequate. and it at least runs an extremely close line to actual straight-up victim blaming.

No one said they deserved to be harassed. OP pointed out that harassment is a widely known possible result of giving personal information to strangers on the internet. I don't blame them for getting harassed, but I do think they and others should look at what happened as a cautionary tale. I'm aware some consider that victim blaming and that goes back to my point that I don't see victim blaming as being 100% bad. I also don't really think it's victim blaming to begin with but most people seem to think it is. If my neighbour left their house unlocaked and they were robbed, I would be sorry for them that they were robbed, I'd also feel sorry for them because they would know they put themselves at a much higher and unnecessary risk and I imagine that they would feel a lot of guilt. Not every stupid thing people do has negative consequences but it isn't surprising when they do.

If there's an epidemic of robberies in your city, and robberies are happening left and right, and your neighbor was an idiot who got robbed, and the city held a town hall meeting to discuss all the robberies, and you got up and told the city council that the real problem was that your neighbor was an idiot, then in that situation, you would be the asshole.

DA
Actually, no. Especially if it is widely known that there's an epidemic of robberies, people will have exponentially less sympathies for someone who threw caution to the wind and, say, refused to check up on his house's security measures despite being situation in a robbery hotspot.

Did you read my post

However little sympathy you have for the person in question, that should not be the focus when you're discussing the broader question of home robberies

Where do you people get this myth from that men are supposedly not taught not to rape anyone? Rape is the number one most revolting crime for most people. It constantly gets the "fate worse than death" treatment (which, btw, is immensely shitty for survivors). Even in prison, rapists are down at the very bottom of the food chain. Men know raping is bad. A few rapists just don't care, the way murderers know murder is wrong yet still do it.

they're taught not to rape, but they're also taught a radically incorrect and extremely limited definition of rape.

this. most people think of rapists only as scary men who lurk in dark alleyways and drag women into their cars.

So? Women get taught they can't possibly be rapists themselves.

And that's wrong as well, so I'm not sure what force your argument could possibly have.

The fact that it's not a male-only problem when it comes to educating people about the nuances of rape.

Nobody... said... it was a male-only problem?

It's probably more harmful overall, because of the fact that we live in a deeply patriarchal society, but of course both men and women should be educated about it correctly.

"Teach men not to rape" and all those rape prevention ads are not heavily implying or outrightly stating it's just a male only problem?

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