[ SECRET POST #3824 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3824 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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02.
[BoJack Horseman]


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06.
[Horizon Zero Dawn]


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09. [WARNING for possible discussion of harassment/sexual assault?]



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10. [WARNING for discussion of rape]

(Bill Cosby and Keshia Knight Pulliam)


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11. [WARNING for discussion of harassment/cyberbulling, abortion, child sexual abuse]















Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #547.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I mean on one hand if I read that I'd sign and roll my eyes because the vast majority of people I personally know who've gotten an abortion at some time felt relief about it if it was what they wanted. And only felt torn up and regretful if it was medically necessary but not what they wanted. But pop culture loves to push this narrative of a woman crying in the waiting room and how it's the hardest thing ever and women are good moral people who feel properly guilty about this terrible thing they had to do for the greater good.

The constant defense of "No one WANTS to get an abortion" is like saying "No one WANTS to take antibiotics!" Like... yeah, I'd totally rather not take antibiotics, but if I go swimming and I get an ear infection even though I'm careful I'm not going to cry in the waiting room picking up my antibiotics to fix that. And when that's brought up constantly in a debate on if keeping women from getting antibiotics will make them think twice before they do something stupid like go swimming then I'm going to roll my eyes and be annoyed at the trope.

But you know what I'd do faced with a fic like that? Click away, maybe block/ao3 savior the author if I'm feeling particularly salty. If someone's response is a witch hunt then they've got serious problems.

[(Anonymous)]

Talking with my friends, some of them said that they wished they had better options available at the time, but none of them have said that they feel they made the wrong decision.

(Though admittedly this self-selects for people who are willing to talk about it, and someone who was seriously regretting it might not be.)

But of course, the regret narrative is impossible to refute concretely, because even in the unlikely event that a woman says, on her deathbed, "you know that abortion I had all those decades ago? For the record, I'd just like to say that I'm still fine with my decision" they will still say that she's going to regret it when she's standing before God to be judged/burning for eternity in the lake of fire.

[jazmin-firewing.livejournal.com]

I work at a Planned Parenthood clinic. Part of my job is talking to patients about their feelings around the decision. While the vast majority say that they're confident that they're making the right decision, I'd say only half tell me that they feel good about it. I agree with the secret that it sounds like the writer drew on her own experience with abortion. I've heard quite a few people say that they wrestled with the decision, that it wasn't easy at all, that while they logically know that to terminate is the best decision, they still feel regret that they had to make the decision in the first place.

Now I really want a link to this story so I can go and anonymously drop the Exhale hotline number.

[(Anonymous)]

I have absolutely no doubt that the people who feel bad about it do exist and are a significant portion. I am purely criticising that it's the only experience I see pushed in fiction and talked about. There's a definite feeling that women who shrug, take Plan B, and go along with their lives as if it was any other medical treatment are Heartless Monsters and not the women to hold up as worthy of admiration in this discussion.

It's the same kneejerk thing that when birth control comes up almost inevitably you'll see "It's not JUST for sluts who can't keep their legs closed! Pure Godly women use it for medical reasons!" Like somehow using it to prevent pregnancy is less feminist than using it to treat hormone imbalances.