fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3852 ]

[ SECRET POST #3852 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3852 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03. http://i.imgur.com/4sW0XLi.jpg
[Mary Elizabeth Winstead in Fargo, season 3 - linked/OP warned for nudity]

__________________________________________________

04. [SPOILERS for Fargo]

__________________________________________________

05. [WARNING for discussion of abortion]

__________________________________________________

06. [WARNING for physical and psychological abuse]

__________________________________________________

07. [WARNING for incest]

__________________________________________________

08. [WARNING for dub con/non con]

[Jafar/Jasmine, Aladdin]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #551.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Okay, so I'm going to a family friend's wedding tomorrow, and there's a guy my age who's going to be there. He's exactly my type, and although we don't see each other very often, we always pick up right where we left off the last time we saw each other.

I'm thinking this would be a good occasion/opportunity to fool around with him. Maybe not all the way, but like, some stuff.

Any advice? Tip? Tricks? Suggestions? Cautionary tales?

Additional info: I'm a 24 year old female. He's a 27 year old male.

Well, how far have you gone with him so far? Easier to give advice if we know what personal boundaries you want to exceed this time.

seconded.

We've never fooled around before. He lives out of state. I'm so fucking sick of being a virgin and I feel like he's my best shot at just fucking getting rid of that monicker.

And please don't tell me that I don't have to and that virginity is a social construct. I get it. Whatever. I just want to sleep with someone I trust to see if I like it and I want to have fun and feel wanted and attractive for once.

definitely bring lube. (and condoms, but I'm sure you know that.)

well, if it's your goal to shoot for the home run instead of second or third base, as it were, then I'd advise that you:

Make sure you are on the same page, first and foremost. If he doesn't feel like the time is right to go all the way, you'll have to negotiate what he is okay with doing. If he is down with doing the horizontal tango, then by all means proceed.

Like people are saying below, use protection, and lube would probably be a very good thing to have on hand. You don't know that you'll need it, but it's better to have it and not need it then find you do need it and not have any around.

Don't try to just jump into intercourse all at once. Take your time and get acquainted with each other's bodies. Start with hands, start slow. Make sure that both of you are comfortable with how things are progressing before you move ahead. Try getting mouths involved if you want, but don't feel like you have to do everything the same night. You've got your whole lives to practice and experiment and find out what you like.

Since it's your first time, take penetration slowly. Make sure you're slippery as an eel downstairs before you try putting anything in there (this is where the lube might come in handy if you happen to be one of those people who can sometimes have trouble getting as wet as they'd like.) Once he's in, take it slowly then as well. No jackhammers right off the bat. Get yourself used to how it feels before you try anything especially athletic. But if you feel like you're ready to really crank it up, try that too! It's all about how you two feel when you're actually in action.

Don't be alarmed or surprised if you're a bit sore the next day. Your body isn't used to sex and it might protest a bit---those tissues are delicate. The soreness will go away. Don't be alarmed either if you end up bleeding a little bit---this can happen sometimes if the opening of the vagina gets a little more roughly handled than it's used to. A little pain during initial penetration can be normal---nervousness about the new experience can cause you to unconsciously be a little tense. It shouldn't keep hurting for very long. If it does, you might be a little mismatched size-wise, or there may not be enough lubrication. Or the position or angle of penetration might need a little fixing.

Don't even try to have a simultaneous orgasm, lol. You'll only frustrate yourselves. Don't expect to come from intercourse, either---most women have a very hard time doing that and some can't (it all depends on the position of the clitoris.) My advice here is that you have him get you off right before you start going for full-on PIV, because that will not only be fun for you but will also help you get extra wet. But don't put too much pressure on either of you to orgasm. It's your first time---not everyone comes their first time, and too much pressure can make it harder to come. Just focus on each other and having fun!

Edited 2017-07-22 01:06 (UTC)

Omg, thank you!

While I agree with the last paragraph, I'd like to add that it's important to remember that clitoral stimulation is a *part* of sex and not a seperate chore that can only happen before or after penetration. I think at this point in the game, having him get you off first is not a bad idea, and definitely don't try to time your orgasm, but your pleasure and his pleasure are not two seperate endeavors that cannot overlap. You can touch your clit during penetration. He can touch your clit during penetration. Also, even if you can't orgasm, from penetration alone (and I think the statistic is more than half of women can't - including me) penetration can still be very pleasurable (eventually, if not initially) so enjoy the sensations of that, too - it's not only for him!

What they said! And yes - there is *nothing* wrong with you reaching down (probably easier if he's balancing over you) or him reaching up or around or whatever and touching your clit/around your clit however feels good and gets you off. Because while orgasm with clitoral stimulation alone is great, paired with the right penetration, it can be *really* great. Definitely something you should experience at some point.

Literally nothing changes after losing it. The moniker doesn't seem like anything like a big deal once it's gone.

If you want to fuck because you want to fuck, good stuff, go with God. But if you want to fuck because you want to be different, maybe think twice.

Use a condom.

Condom condom condom.

Don't let the two of you get too drunk first. Consent issues aside, too much alcohol can inhibit a guy's ability to get an erection, and I assume you'd like to remember it the next day.

Laughter is good. Physical activity beforehand is good. Excitement is good. Don't try to force things to be super serious. You are not characters in a dramatic movie. Being really serious is usually a mood-killer.

I think "Let's just get this over with" is a good attitude, actually (don't phrase it to him that way, though). There's a lot of weirdness built up around the first time a woman has sex, from a variety of directions. This includes the idea that it's some kind of foundational event that she will remember forever. I was 24 the first time I had sex. I was stone cold sober and it was with my boyfriend at the time, who had been my best friend before we started dating, so not exactly a forgettable guy... and I remember almost nothing of the actual sex. (The upshot is that it wasn't really bad sex, since I expect I'd remember that!) So, don't worry about it being ~*magical*~ or anything or let people give you crap if it isn't (hopefully he's not going to be weird about it, if he even knows you are a virgin - you don't have to tell him). Just have fun!

Go get 'em, tiger. Be safe, have fun, don't feel like you have to just do it because you think you shouldn't be a virgin anymore if it doesn't genuinely feel fun for you.

Don't be self-conscious or worried. When I lost my virginity I thought it was going to be a big awkward deal, but it wasn't. And feel free to let him lead if you don't think you know what you're doing.

Establish your boundaries with him. He can't read your mind, so tell him what you feel comfortable with.

And as also mentioned, use a condom. Maybe bring some yourself if you don't know if he'll have any.

And of course, have fun!

Don't forget to bring a ~~towel~~ condom. Also Plan B, in case you're female and don't want to get pregnant.

TMI: Again, if female I believe masturbating before doing the do will help you relax and lubricated. But I'd say it also depends on whether you can have an orgasm after the first one or if you just can do it just once and then get sleepy/have to wait. Also foreplay.

That said, have fun!

I second (or is it fourth by now?) the lube. Better to have it and not need it, etc. I thought for YEARS that there was some deep-seated psychological reason I couldn't enjoy sex. Nope, just needed some lube.

You can get small sample sizes at the adult store for a few bucks, which will let you try out different ones, as well as fitting discreetly in even the tiniest purse. Or tucked into Victoria's Secret Compartment, if you prefer.

It's good that you're planning, but you might be putting the cart before the horse. Especiallly if you guys have never done anything before. How do you know he's even interested in you that way?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #3852 ]

Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?

Re: Losing my virginity?