Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2008-06-27 05:00 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2008-06-27 05:00 pm
[ SECRET POST #539 ]
⌈ Secret Post #539 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #077.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 2 3 - repeat ], [ 1 - response ], [ 1 2 - personal attack ], [ 1 - troll; yes, I remember it's you ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
109. TL;DR COMING YOUR WAY!
This is from a rant I made on the subject a while ago and is going to be extremely opinionated and TL;DR. No, really.
No. Really. Don't say I didn't warn you.
In the past, I've made it pretty clear that I hate the top/bottom trend with a fiery passion. NOT because I don't think people have preferences, as I know most do. It's when those preferences are founded on whether a character is short, tall, has long hair, pretty eyes, or any number of ridiculous “masculine” or “feminine” traits... But before I continue, I want to preface this by stressing that this is only my opinion and I don't think it's wrong in the slightest for people to like this sort of thing. I'm simply irked that it establishes an accepted and expected perception of what a character does or does not like in bed based on whether or not they have a "dominant" or "submissive" personality, or worse, what they look like. What's even more distressing is that, from what I've seen, a lot of those ideas carry over to what people think of gay men in real life.
Again, this is all my opinion, but I have an irrational, pressing need to state exactly why I want to rip my hair out every time someone asks me, "lol you think [insert character name] tops/bottoms? newb"
I like realism. I do. And in reality, sexual preferences (of the "this is the position I like" variety, not the "this is what I identify as" kind) are determined by what feels good, not who's dominant or submissive. Yes, that's a kink. There are people who go out looking for someone to dominate them just as there are people who go out looking for someone to bend to their will, but that's something slightly different and also rarely has anything to do with their personality outside of the bedroom, let alone what they look like. Granted, a character's personality is going to have some affect on how they act during a sexual encounter, but I'd like to think it primarily portends to how likely they are to initiate affection, how far they're willing to go, what they're willing to try, etc, but when all is said and done and they're comfortable with their preferences, it has nothing to do with whether or not they like to take it up the ass. Again, that's something that's determined by what feels good.
AND THOSE, DEAR OP, ARE MY THOUGHTS ON YAOI.
Re: 109. TL;DR COMING YOUR WAY!
Re: 109. TL;DR COMING YOUR WAY!
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Re: 109. TL;DR COMING YOUR WAY!
Re: 109. TL;DR COMING YOUR WAY!
Re: 109. TL;DR COMING YOUR WAY!
That said, I do think some relationships (more than the total d/s kink ones) have a kind of power dynamic where someone's more passive just to "hold on to" the other person, but I also don't think that's a very healthy kind of relationship.
It also annoys me that people want the more "feminine" man to bottom. Can he top once plz? Or just fewer stereotypes?